Not Handsome Enough to Tempt Me
by imafeckingstarr

Summary: Sitting at the bar in a nightclub, Lizzy happens to overhear a conversation between two guys when one of them insults her. Unimpressed with the arrogance on display, she decides to take the guy down… completely and utterly AU

A/N: Love, love, love Pride and Prejudice, it's one of my favourite novels in existence! I hope I do Jane Austen justice

Disclaimer: I do not own the fabulous works of Jane Austen, nor do I own the characters, I am making no profit out of this either. This is merely for my own amusement!

'Mr Douchey'

Lizzy perched at the bar as she ordered another drink, desperate to get away from the crowd of boys surrounding her sister Lydia. Charlotte was nowhere to be seen, and Lizzy presumed she had gone to the toilet to find Jane. She was beginning to think she wasn't going to be able to hack the rest of the week – Freshers only came round twice a year, after all. Never again was she going to let Lydia coax her into wearing ridiculous looking stilettoes simply because they made her outfit look 'super cute'. She knew not to listen to her younger sister's advice, after all, she was the one wearing the skimpiest outfit possible whilst grinding on some poor, helpless boy. The bar tender handed Lizzy her drink – double vodka and diet coke – and leaned against it, shaking her head at her sisters behaviour. Lydia was known for her seemingly provocative dancing in their local hometown, Lizzy hoped she would have toned it down for hers and Jane's visit – apparently not.

"Darcy you must… must come dance!" One man slurred as he stumbled over to his friend. The music was blaring loudly, Lizzy was surprised that she could hear him, let alone his friend.

"Charles I don't like dancing, you're drunk not stupid. Enjoy your evening."

Charles grinned widely, spilt a little of his drink, and then frowned when he realised that his friend was trying to get rid of him. "Dammit man, you have to dance! Look at all these beautiful ladies!"

Lizzy spotted both Jane and Charlotte, who were trying to pry a very drunk Lydia off a metal pole she had assumed was there for her to spin on. From the corner of her eye, Lizzy could see the two men look in their direction, one of the men – Darcy – nodded at them.

"Are you talking about the girl you met over by the stairs? Yes, I guess she is good looking. Go fucking dance with her, stop talking to me about it and let me finish my drink."

He didn't sound pleased with his friends efforts of trying to get him to dance. Lizzy smiled a little. It was very rare for Jane to meet someone she seemed likable, and in a club of all places.

"I don't think I've ever met someone quite as good looking on a night out Darcy… get me another drink, will you? Make it two? I want to get her a drink… I can't find my wallet…"

"That's because you're patting your chest, Charles."

Lizzy had to stop herself from laughing.

"Oh…"

"Forget the drinks, go dance. I'll be here."

"No… no… you must come and dance! Look, look over there!"

As Lizzy turned around to pick up her drink, the men had turned in her direction.

"She's pretty… rather pretty… you should ask her to go dance! Go on! I dare you."

From where she was standing, it sounded like Darcy had snorted into his drink. Lizzy couldn't be sure though, the music was beginning to ring loudly in her ears.

"Yes I guess she is. Not pretty enough for me to actually go dance with though. Go fucking enjoy the rest of your night Charles, you won't remember a thing in the morning."

Lizzy just stood there, cup gently resting against her lips. Did he just insult her? What right did he have to say she wasn't pretty enough to dance with? Sure, she's not half as pretty as Jane, nor does she know how to move to the music like Lydia did, but what did that matter in a club filled with drunk strangers? Lizzy was seething. How dare he! He didn't know her, he couldn't pass a judgment as such without even saying 'hello' first! Who did he think he was to show such arrogance?

'Just go up to him.' Lizzy thought, 'smack him… throw a punch… throw something at him… spill your drink on him… do something! Elizabeth Bennett you are a strong, independent woman, you will not be slighted by such arrogance!'

Downing her drink and asking for another, Lizzy made up her mind to go and talk to Mr Douchey. She had consumed a fair amount of alcohol, her confidence was soaring. Paying for her final drink of the night, Lizzy held her head up high and approached the man who had found himself so superior to everyone else.

"Not pretty enough to dance with you, huh?"

"I beg your pardon?"

Lizzy smiled sweetly, "You heard me. Who said I wanted to dance with you? Who said I wanted to dance at all? Thank you so much for the confidence boost though, men like you should receive an award. 'Destroyer of Self-Confidence', sounds fancy, doesn't it?"

Darcy said nothing, he simply stared at her. Lizzy began to get agitated, she was not one to be trifled with!

"You're not going to apologise?"

"For what?"

"You're joking right?" Lizzy asked incredulously, "You had the audacity to insult me to your friend, and you won't even apologise? What kind of man are you? Are you really that arrogant to not see where you've gone wrong?"

Darcy blinked. Lizzy knew she wasn't going to get the answer she wanted, yet she persisted. He was not going to get away with this arrogance.

"Lizzy!"

Charlotte called out to her as the song changed to something less upbeat. Lizzy turned to see Charlotte struggling to keep hold of Lydia, who was on the verge of collapsing at any moment. She knew she should go and help her best friend, but she wanted her answer. She needed to get him to apologise.

"Your friends need you." Darcy said finally, pointing in the direction of Charlotte and Lydia. Jane looked helpless, she didn't know what to do other than occupy Charles by preventing him from falling over.

"As does yours." Lizzy replied hotly, "Arrogance will get you no-where. I sincerely hope you're happy with yourself."

Satisfied with Darcy's startled expression, Lizzy placed her glass back on the bar and walked towards Charlotte to help her with a very drunk Lydia. She never got her apology, but calling him out on his arrogance made her feel warm inside. It was refreshing.

'Now to get Lydia back home safely…'