A Yu-Gi-Oh! Fanfiction by SpookyChild
Author's Notes:
Here I am, writing another sequel… I think I should get a title, something like "The Ruler and Master of All Things Good, Holy and Sequel-y." Because I'm boss like that.
…Yeah, I promise to never say that again. So, here's another story starring the one and only MALIK! Everyone's favorite spasmodic Egyptian. [Malik is just another version of me, so help me God…] So Malik decides to stay in for the night. Watch as everything turns to MADNESS! Well, actually…no.
Disclaimer: So then Kazuki Takahashi says to me, he says, "You'll never get Yu-Gi-Oh! It's mine I tell you! MINE! MWAHAHAHAHAAAAA!" Then he makes a mad dash out of the building. Pssh. Loser.
The First Chapter in a Story of Many Chapters!
[That means chapter one.]
"No, sorry Yami, my brother can't come to the phone right now." Isis said into the phone. She stood up on her toes to grab a roll of paper towels from the cupboard. "He's with the Psycho."
"What are they doing?" Came the Pharaoh's voice.
"Hiding in the linen closet." Isis stated.
"Why?"
"Well, Bakura was over earlier and decided to play a trick on Yami Malik by showing him the movie 'Armageddon' and telling him that it was a news report. So now he's hiding in the linen cupboard, convinced that the end is happening 'sooner than we think'." Isis made air quotes with her fingers before remembering that Yami couldn't see her.
"And Malik?"
"Looking for his Christmas towels."
"Okay…do you think you could go get him for me?"
Isis shrugged. "Sure. Hold on." She sat the phone down and walked out of the kitchen, making her way down the hall and eventually to the linen cabinet. Isis opened the door and poked her head in. "Malik, Yami Yuugi is on the phone and he wants to speak-,"
"RADIATION POISONING! UNCLEAN! UNCLEAN! SHUT THE DOOR!" Yami Malik shrieked, pointing a water pistol at Isis's head and pulling the trigger. Isis frowned and wiped the water off of her forehead.
"Hey, Psycho, I know for a fact that there's a package of Popsicles in the freezer that would really like for you to rescue them from unimaginable torment." She said to the Egyptian spirit on the floor. Y. Malik perked up.
"Like in 'Saving Private Ryan'?" He asked. Isis sighed.
"Yes, Psycho. Like in 'Saving Private Ryan'." She mumbled sarcastically. Y. Malik jumped up from his crouched position.
"I'm going in." He did a ridiculously dangerous tumble out of the linen cabinet, in search of the ill-fated Popsicles. Isis rolled her eyes and looked up when Malik hopped down from the top shelf of the cabinet, wearing a bandana around his head and rubber gloves on his hands. He dropped a box down with him.
"Found them." He stated happily, dusting off his sweater. "They were in the crawl space. Man, do you know how many dead pigeons I found up there?"
"Yami's on the phone for you. And did you say dead pigeons?" Malik shrugged and walked past her, taking off his rubber gloves and picking the phone up.
"Hello?"
"Hey, Malik. Bakura and I were wondering if you wanted to come over. We were going to play a trick on Kaiba." Yami's voice said over the phone. Malik raised his eyebrow.
"Like what?" He asked.
"I don't know. Bakura said something about switching a piñata with a hornet's nest, but I don't believe he's thinking it through. I mean, where are we going to get a piñata?"
"Eh…" Malik shifted slightly. "Actually, I think I'm just going to stay home tonight. You know, clean, watch some 'Martha's Kitchen', maybe rent some movies."
"…My Ra, Malik, are you nesting or something?!"
"I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it's none of your business." Malik said sharply, frowning.
"Fine, Malik. Call us when you grow a penis."
"Why, so you can see what one looks like? IN YOUR FACE!" Malik quickly hung up the phone and giggled.
"So, what did he want?" Isis asked, walking into the kitchen. Malik rolled his eyes.
"Don't ask. Hey, you want to rent some movies tonight?" He asked. Isis shrugged.
"Sure." She turned and left the kitchen. Malik picked up the phone and dialed a number.
"Hello?" Came Ryou's voice after a few rings.
"Hey Ryou. Want to come over tonight? I'm going to rent some movies."
"I don't know…" Ryou's voice sounded uncertain.
"Oh, come on Ryou." Malik persisted. "We could rent 'Meet Joe Black'. Brad Pitt and Anthony Hopkins. If you pause it just right you can see his Maytag refrigerator."
"I don't know. I'm waiting for Bakura to get home."
Malik frowned. "Where is he?"
"I sent him to the grocery store three hours ago for milk." Ryou sighed over the phone. "It's amazing how fast 'going to the grocery store' turned into 'going to the strip club'."
"Yeah, I know what you mean." Malik leaned against the kitchen counter. "I've got the same problem over here."
"…How?"
"Listen, just come over later." Malik hung up and went into the hallway, grabbing his jacket on his way. He stuck his head into the living room. "Hey, Yami! Wanna come with me to the movie store?"
"But what about the meteors?" Y. Malik cried from on the couch. Malik paused for a moment before opening the hall closet and pulling out an army helmet. He tossed it to Y. Malik.
"There you go. Now come on." Y. Malik rushed out the door and Malik turned to his sister. "Hey, remember to tape 'Buffy' for me." He stopped and chuckled to himself. "Oh, that Buffy. She's always slaying those vampires." Still laughing, he walked out the door. Isis watched him go before snorting.
"Yeah, whatever. Jackass." She added before sitting down on the couch to watch 'The Real World'.
***
"-So then the Pharaoh says to me, he says, 'As if!', and I'm all like, 'Oh, don't GO there!'" Malik shouted loudly. "Man, the Pharaoh is such a LOSER!" He used his index finger and his thumb to make an 'L' on his forehead.
"Wow, you're manly!" Y. Malik exclaimed, still wearing the army helmet on his head. He spun his water pistol around with his finger, but it fell off mid-spin and dropped to the ground. "Oops."
"Just leave it." Malik said, hopping over the broken plastic toy. "It'll be a casualty." Y. Malik shrugged.
"Okay."
So, our heroes continued their Awesome and Important Journey to the Enchanted Video Store of Doom.
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(A/N)
So, what movies will Malik rent? Will Ryou come over later? Will Y. Malik leave his water pistol on the sidewalk as a 'casualty'? Will Isis record 'Buffy'? Does anyone even care? Not bloody likely…
Stay tuned for: The Second Chapter in a Story of Many Chapters! [That means chapter two.]
Thanks for doing that thing!