Fierce
Chapter 1
When I was younger, I believed in happy endings. I believed in all the clichés that came with the perfect life. Perfect friends, perfect match and then, the perfect wedding. Love at first sight, tender moments, love proofs and never ending smiles.
I entered highschool, and my vision of the romantic world started to change as I entered the complex world of dating. It went from wonderful, to good, all the way down to "meh".
It seems funny to me now, that I'm going through the fourth break up in a year. Ino says I should take a break in relationships. That's funny also, I never noticed I was tired of going through the same things over and over again. It took a bottle of tequila, a pack of cigarettes, a clouded night sky and my crazy bleached haired best friend to come into that realization. Don't get me wrong, I'm not oblivious, I don't even do oblivious. It's just that, there's this part of me that doesn't want to be alone, a part of me that's scared of being alone, a part of me that needs to be completed. I don't ask for mr. Perfect, I ask for someone that is the cherry on top of my cake, someone who reads through me so I don't have to explain myself, that not only reads but writes me, that understands my fucked up mind and actually likes it. Someone who cares with actions and not needless words.
Don't get me wrong, I have Ino. I'm always telling her that if I swung the other way I'd snag her. But you know? She's my best friend, but she's not the cherry on top of my cake, she's half of what my cake's made of. She reads through me because she's part of my story, she's the letters to my words, and don't even get me started on our minds because if I'm a storm, she's a hurricane. What I mean is, I need some heated contrast in my life, I need fire and passion, I want to take a ride to someplace so outside of this world not even Lady Gaga could come up with. I want somebody to teach me the purpose of the blood running through my veins because I don't want to become obsolete, dead.
I walked in to the balcony of my apartment, on the 7th floor. I took a deep breath of fresh air before I lit a cigarette, using my hand to prevent the wind from blowing it out.
"I seriously should stop smoking." I muttered to no one, sitting on the dark pink beanbag, settling comfortably while putting down the pack of Sobranie Mint on the little table. It felt good to feel the cool air on my skin and enjoy the darkness night offered. My eyes were closed, but I felt Ino nearing.
"Absolutely." She said smoothly while plopping herself down on the purple one on my left. It was handpicked by her when I moved in, she thinks it goes well with the wooden tiled floor. When I looked at her she already had one of the minty sticks in her full red lips. "It's a shame though," she continued concetrated on the process of litting it, "they're so fancy."
I gave her a wary look. She was grinning at me, with a mischevious look in her eyes. After a moment she scratched her temple for like, two seconds. I glanced at her long fingernails, which were painted in a vivid red, then back at her. "Yes..they are." I approached the guilty pleasure to my lips, but stopped before it actually touched them "Ino." I said, retracting the hand holding the cigarette.
"Hmmm?" She dragged out, exhaling a light grey cloud of smoke. I looked at her, not really sure if I wanted to start this conversation. When I called Ino earlier I only told her what happened, and she knew exactly what to do. Thirty minutes later she was rigging the bell with three packs of said Sobranie and a bottle of Tequila. I didn't cry for the fourth time, although I should, because we had a name for this and I should honour the namesake. The fourth break-up night and I wasn't feeling bad exactly, I was relaxed, and halfway hammered. And I had to work next day, but I would call in sick.
I didn't notice I was staring at the table for like, a minute, and I didn't notice the ashes falling on the ground. Ino snapped me out of daze, putting out the cigarette on the ashtray, hers was finished. Slumping down in her seat, hands behing her head, she said with her sparkling blue eyes closed "Sweetheart, I got a bottle of tequila back there, it's like 3:30 AM, and if you don't have nothing to say then I'll-"
"Do you think I'm a whore?" I blurted out.
My best friend chuckled. "Where did that come from?" She was now sitting straight, looking at me. "Listen, you've had four relationships in a year. Gorgeous guys, might I add." She playfully said, smirking. And I glared just for the hell of it. "Don't look at me like that, Saki, you know you're lucky. For some reason it didn't work out the way you'd want to, but it's okay, because you know what? It's fun." I finished mine, and put it in the ashtray. "It's fun because you get to know different types of guys and explore them. It is not slutty to have sex with four different guys, at different times, especially since they were boyfriends, and since you don't get frisky..." She trailled off, sniffing because of the cold air. "And if you think that's slutty, than I think I might be a slut, because I get in with guys I don't even know their names in the morning." She snorted, looking away. "Watch and learn, Sakura. No strings attached, it's called being practical. And it's marvellous until you get what you're looking for, because that's what it is in the end, exausting search."
"Heh.." I breathed out, "I hope it pays off." I got up, letting out a yawn without covering my mouth, there goes my manners. I heard Ino coughing in her seat, and extended a hand, which she took.
"Damn fancy cigarettes..." she whispered.
"It's not my fancy cigarettes fault you went outside in shorts and a tank top." I replied, with an unmistakable tint of annoyance in my voice. "Come on pig, you're going to get a cold."
Ino and I went in the house, with our teeth chattering in cold.
We finished our amazing tequilla during the night, I think I might've fallen asleep during some True Blood's episode I had in my DVR I hadn't seen yet. So when I woke up in my black leather couch with Ino on the floor, the sun beamed through the windows as if knowing I'd wake up hungover, I felt like it just wanted to piss me off. Like, 'Hi, I'm the sun, rise and shine.' which seemed to me like a failed joke. I stirred, getting used to the light. The TV was still on, I turned it off. Reaching for my beautiful BlackBerry at the opposite end, I checked the time. It was 9:50 AM and I was twenty minutes late if I was actually going, which I was not because I was nowhere near ready. I ran a hand through my pink locks as I got up, stepping on Ino. She protested in mumbles which ran along the lines of "don't do that again bitch, I'm gonna kill you." I smiled.
"As if you could."
I went to the bathroom. I've got this weird fascination with my bathroom because it's huge, and I had the best bathtub in the world, and God forbid me, I was going to use it.
"I certainly could use some relaxing.." I said, taking off my clothes, the small buzzing in my head turning into an headache. I sighed deeply when I felt the warm water in my skin, and my mind drifted off to La La Land. Thirty minutes later I was humming contentedly to some The Ronettes song I dreamed of, don't ask me why but I think it has to do with me and the girls watching Dirty Dancing the other day.
I'm sure I looked stupid when Ino busted through the door claiming she really had to pee, because while she was sitting down the toilet she eyed me suspiciously.
"What's with the stupid smile?" She asked, face leaning into her palms. You see, this is one of those awkward situations I would be embarassed of if it wasn't Ino. And I'm sure this would be embarassing for Ino if it wasn't me on the bathtub. She would never bust in like that in the first place, or at least I like to think. Yeah, I like to think I'm special. Regarding someone as your bestfriend it's like giving them a free pass into your whole life, and in this case, your own privacy. The only thing I'm bummed about though, it's the fact that she left the door open, and suddenly I'm freezing here.
"Just pee already, wipe your vagoo and get the hell out of my bathroom." I said annoyed. She giggled stupidly. "Oh, and while you're at it," I continued, "close the door."
Ino was laughing, and it was getting rather annoying. I didn't want to yell because that shit makes wrinkles and that would ruin my chances of marrying the guy of my dreams. Okay, maybe I shouldn't be so dramatic, but hey, I'm not getting any younger, you know. Just sayin'. Since she was taking her time in leaving I decided I should help, so I grabbed a bottle of shampoo and threw it at her. She dodged just in time and held her hands in defeat, feigning hurt.
"Saki.." She said, her voice coming down in a whine, and the puppy eyes coming into play. I never fell for that, nor either I should, because it was downright repulsive. Seriously, how could anyone feel sorry of that? She looked like a hag.
"Piggy.. Your ugliness depresses me." I said, in that same tone, pouting. I dropped the act right after and snorted. Ino picked up the bottle and threw it right back at me, I threw my hands in front of my face to protect myself but it fell right into the water, sprinkling everywhere. I glared at her and she left the room, muttering a low "bitch." and I glared some more.
I heard the pig roaming through my walk-in closet, and I wished from the bottom of my heart she didn't mess up everything, but I was positive she did. Oh well. A loud gasp ressonated through the walls as I looked at myself in the mirror. I had a huge pimple in my neck and I imediately regreted eating that fabulous mousse au chocolat I had in the fridge the day before. It's not like I had cravings or anything. I contemplated it for a while and just thought "the hell with it." The hell with the redness appearing in that spot after I popped it, I could cover it with a little bit of foudation. Thank you, L'Oréal.
"Ugh. I'm disturbing." I said, a little bit disgusted with my urge to pop pimples.
"Sakura, just hurry up. We're going out!" Ino yelled from my room. We would go shopping so I guess I should nevermind staying in for the day. I called Tenten, my mom called, my sister called right after and I was glad it was all in one go, so I had them out of the way. It was almost eleven when we reached the mall, I dragged Ino to Starbucks because I was in desperate need of some cafeine. After I got that out of the way also, we resorted to our womanly routine which was amazing, even though I hate to try outfits because I'm too lazy take off and put on clothes, I rather just buy them and if something's wrong I can always return.
When I got home, I randomly checked my cellphone and stiffened a little when I saw Leo's text, apologizing and all. Leo is my ex, well, one of them, as in the most recent adition. I'm starting to think that if it's becoming a trend, and it sticks, then maybe I should form a club or something and organize these amazing dinners were we'd reminisce and I'd secretly oggle at them, but keep it low profile. I pushed that thought away and ran through the rest of the texts. I had one from Tenten, asking if I was alright and saying that she had major dirt on Tsunade. Needless to say I was interested, I mean.. she's only my boss. Having nothing better to do, and being really interested I called my amazing co-worker.
"Hello?"
"Hi Ten. How's it going at the office?"
"You won't believe it."
"Try me."
"Tsunade's having her way with Kakashi."
I had to restrain myself from laugher, even though I cringed a little. "Shut the fuck up." I said, with disbelief.
"I'm serious. Like, today I got here early because I had to take care of some details, you know, the Katy Perry photoshoot."
Shit.
"Yeah.. about that, sorry, I wasn't feeling good today."
"No problem sweetie, I've got you covered. It looks perfect, I just need your opinion on the cover."
"Did I already told you I love you?"
"You did, and I already told you I know. But anyway, we're getting off topic."
"I know right? Do elaborate, please."
"Okay, so, I thought no one was there. For some reason I felt like I was the boss so I went to Tsunade's office. When I got there I heard someone, but I didn't enter, obviously. My gossip senses were tingling and I was like, 'I'm in for something huge'. Sure thing Saki, I came at the right time, Tsunade was all over the place. Jiraya suspects something's going on, and even sent a detective after her! I know because apparently, Kakashi figured something strange at the office. Isn't he just awesome? "
"Damn right he is. But how do you know it's not Tsunade with someone else?"
"Because, I heard him say she shouldn't be worrying, and then papers shuffling, a grunt and some moaning."
"Uh..Okay..Disturbing." I cringed even harder. "I don't blame the man though, she has huge coconuts."
"That's disgusting Sakura, shame on you."
"You're such an hypocrite Tenten."
"You should be ashamed of looking into another woman's breasts." She said in a disapprovingly tone. I laughed. "Well, I gotta go princess, behave yourself."
"Yeah yeah, take care Tenten." I figured she had a date with Neji, our talented photographer.
I had this smile plastered on my face that I just couldn't wipe off, I knew Tsunade had the hots for my man Kakashi but I never knew they had actually hook up. I couldn't help but wonder though, what would happen if Jiraya, (her husband and half owner of Fierce) found out the truth. If he hadn't already. It wasn't like their marriage was going well but hey, cheating will always be cheating. Everybody can tell that he's not very fond of our beloved magazine, he had only actually found it with Tsunade because it always had been her dream. He could fuck us up if the truth came out and I didn't want to even think about it, neither I should, because nobody knows but me and Tenten (Tsunade and Kakashi too, but they didn't know we knew so... yeah.) and if she doesn't worry, than I won't.
All's fair in love and war.
I spent the last two weeks working like crazy. I was officially over Leo and tried to follow Ino's rule of "No strings attached." I kinda did. Well, I had to because she insisted in bringing me over to these crazy parties, clubs and whatnot. I can't complain because it distracted me along with work, and those guys were hunks. But Ino would always be Ino and I would always be Sakura, so I'd never take that rule seriously because I'm not like that. I wish I was though, lucky her. At the office, people were already buzzing about Tsunade and Kakashi but no one had the guts to mention this at the aformentioned's face. I can asure you that neither Tenten or me opened their mouths about it, it's just that they're getting kinda sloppy in hiding their relationship. For example, one of these days I had to show Tsunade some sample editions of Fierce to see which of them she liked, so naturally I knocked on the door and she took her time to send me in. I heard some whispers and found it strange but it all made sense when Kakashi left the office hurriedly without even aknowledging me and Tsunade was all flustered and tense, smoothing her hair. I smirked knowingly and she gulped, asking me what was the problem so I left her the samples innocently, closed the door innocently, and literally RAN to Tenten.
Tenten's pretty cool, I couldn't ask for a better friend but as a co-worker, I could. Well, in some instances. For example this one, where I sat for 10 minutes in my car while she got ready, completely pissed because I thought she was when I called her before leaving my house.
I closed my eyes and clasped my hands in front of my face praying to God. "Lord, please make the guys at the repair shop return her car flawlessly so I can go back to work in time." I pleaded sadly, without noticing her arrival. She sat beside me, fixing her hair at the rear-view mirror. I mean, seriously why do all of my friends have to be so obnoxiously stupid? "I never knew you were the religious type." She said simply, going back down to her seat. Doesn't she know that right in front of her there's a mirror on the sun visor for that exact purpose? And that the act of pulling it down is ridiculously easy ?
I started the engine, slightly grunting. "Not quite. But if you keep being late I might turn into a nun or something." I said, glancing at the brunette quickly. She was frantically looking for something in her purse all of a sudden, which turned out to be her Iphone. While she was reading the text, I wondered how could she feel the vibration with the amount of stuff she puts in there and how could she always get which of her cell phones she has right. She nodded curtly to herself at the end and put the Iphone back in the purse. "I don't think you could pull that off easily Saki." She said in reply to my previous statement, though I had already rest my case. She was looking serious despite of her remark, and I asked what was wrong. She only told me to hurry because we had a last minute meeting to attend. I nodded. "You see Tenten, that's why we should always be on time, we never know with Tsunade." I told her playfully.
"Hmmhmm." Came the muffled reply. I glanced at her again and saw her biting her fingernails. I had this weird feeling when she told me about the meeting and now she confirmed it just by that simple gesture. Everyone who knows Tenten knows what are her most prized possessions. Her black BMW 6 series convertible, her credit card, her three cell phones and last but not least: her beautiful fingernails in which she invested a lot of time (and money).
It's not that I'm a psychic, by any means. Tsunade, despite her flings is a very efficient businesswoman and I have nothing but respect for her (don't hate because every woman likes her gossip session). In my six years working at the editor with her, we've grown to be good friends, even though it didn't start that way. So.. I can say I know a thing or two about her. I one thing I know for sure is that she's very meticulous when it comes to these things, all the more reason to be worried.
Perhaps it has something to do with the Tsunade-Kakashi-Jiraya thing? I hoped not.
When me and Tenten entered the editor it was pretty obvious we could cut the tension with a knife. I looked around and everybody seemed to be busying themselves with the normal tasks. My boss came up to me looking stressed and said she needed to talk in private, and that's not good in anyone's book. I straightened my back and followed her quietly because I didn't want to disturb her any further. She sat down in her chair and invited me to sit down, and I was not liking this one bit.
"What's th-"
"I'm leaving for a while." She interrupted me, going straight to the point. Tsunade was never one to lose time anyway. When I widened my eyes in surprise she sighed. "I'm leaving to take care of some personal matters, so I wanted to speak to you before the meeting, just to let you know that I've assigned you to take my duties while I'm gone." She said, and leaned back in her seat with her hands clasped in front of her face in a thoughtful manner. I could tell she wasn't expecting no for an awswer but I was so freaking nervous I couldn't even formulate a sentence.
"I..." I started, unsure of what to say. I opened my mouth to speak but nothing came out. "I appreciate your reliability in me but..." a ghost of a smile appeared on my lips for a second, and it was hard to face her big amber eyes that observed in hope, expectancy. "I'm just a journalist, I'm not sure I can handle this."
"Nonsense. You've grown to be so much more and you know it. I'd think you knew me a little more, Sakura. I wouldn't give you this chance if I didn't think you weren't worthy." She chuckled, the sound reminding me of cinnamon muffins. There was pride in her voice and I couldn't help but feel good. "I'm well aware that you don't have much experience in the corporative department, but don't worry. I talked to someone that'll guide you through that."
"Yeah, that makes me feel so much better." I mumbled distractedly. She chuckled again in that velvety sound that reminded me now of plain honey and I couldn't help but think that if I ate Tsunade's chuckles I'd be fat right now.
"Oh please, Sakura. You act like this is going to be a disaster of massive proportions." She said, looking at me with that playfull glint in her eyes. It's good that I get this from her now, because when I started she was vicious and I only got sneers and drowned everyday in sarcasm. I guess it's my fault that I was such a brat back then, and if I'm not much nowadays I owe it to her, because she taught me the hard way. I wonder what would she do if she even sensed that Tenten and I knew about her little fling with Kakashi. Probably ripped our heads off. "I might be getting old, but I'm not getting senile. Now go make yourself pretty, you'll meet your 'partner' in a minute."
I smirked and stood up. "As if.." I started in moking arrogance. "I need to make myself pretty." Despite playing around, I walked to the door but I still don't know how could I even stand up. I still wasn't believing that I would be in charge of "Fierce".
Temporarily.
But still.
I would be sitting right in that chair.
I would be in charge.
That's right, me, Haruno Sakura. In charge. Hear me roar.
Before I reached the door handle I heard a quiet voice behind me said, "Make me proud, Sakura."
I tensed, momentarilly, feeling what she meant by that. I felt the responsability and I absolutely couldn't dissappoint anyone, especially her. If I fucked up, I'd kill myself. Seriously. Closing the door behing me, I leaned against it, sighing in a mix of feelings. Anxiety, enthusiasm, fear, pride, satisfaction. "Well," I thought. "If I really have to do this, I really have to do this."
I was scared.
Scared shitless.
I didn't know how were they going to react to this. I mean, it's only temporary but I'm bound to be hated.
Everybody was looking at me as the new boss. And I was staring at them as my new..employees? Argh, it would take time to get used to this. I glanced at Tenten. She had this huge smile on her face and was making a 'thumbs up' sign. Cool, no problem there. Neji, standing beside her had an impassive look on his face. He always had an impassive look on his face, but I knew that if he was against me he wouldn't look like that. Hinata, Kakashi's assistant was smiling, Kakashi himself, was unaffected, reading his little orange book (I'm sure that's porn). The rest of the people seemed pretty much ok with it. The only person that was seemed pissed was Karin, Tsunade's assistant. She never really liked me so I guess that's fine. She was jealous of my friendship with her, so I willing to bet if she could, she'd kill me. I hope when Tsunade said to 'take her duties' she didn't mean to take her assistant as well, because I don't want her bad energies near me. Nuh-huh.
I didn't realize I was staring for a long time, until I heard a knock on the door.
"Come in." Tsunade said.
I turned my head in the door's direction and my jaw dropped. Let me tell you, it hurts after a while and I needed a glass of water asap because my mouth was getting dry and I was feeling a little hot, because this gorgeous man entered the room and he was sizzling. He was perfect in my eyes. Tall, pale, strong aristocratic features, perfect nose, perfect jawline, perfect lips, beautiful black hair, dark eyes. (His haircut was a little strange, but the hair looked really smooth, and I wanted to touch it, just in case.) Yes, I guess I'm a sucker for this type. It's like, if you throw Bill Compton and Eric Northman at me, I'd chose Bill. Don't know why. In my daze I wondered briefly if he got the place wrong.
I must have looked really stupid when he passed me by, because I could only blink and stare. I'm positive that he raised the same reaction from the girls.
"Oh! I'm glad you made it. This is my staff," Tsunade said, everybody greeted him and he nodded expressionless in response. "Guys, this is Uchiha Sasuke. He's the son of an old friend of mine and he's going to assist Sakura in the corporative department, so I suggest you treat him like you'd treat me, and help him out in everything you can."
I took in all what Tsunade said. I was fidgeting nervously, suddenly this was too much for me. First, she hands me control of the magazine, then, she brings in this GOD to work with me. But damn, I'll make sure he helps me in more ways than he should. If you get my drift.
Anyway, I honestly couldn't take my eyes off him, if I was a child freezing, he'd be my blanket. It was instant attraction, like some physical or chemical reaction.
"She can be a little stubborn and nosy, but all in all she's really nice." I faintly heard Tsunade say, and realized she was talking about me. He was listening respectfully to her, nodding every now and then, and I felt my eyes narrow a little. The nerve of her, right in my face! Not focusing on anything in specific I saw that Tsunade was explaining something to him. I figured he was a man of few words. Couldn't stop myself from glaring daggers at my boss, for she was talking about me as if I weren't there. A minute seemed like an eternity, and I wanted to get out of there. Hot guy or not, my nerves were getting the best of me, and I had plenty of time to deal with him.
Out of nowhere he casually flicked his head and my direction and smirked, looking away slowly. It was as if he knew I got my eyes on him.
That was intense.
I didn't know what to expect but..
I must admit he caught my attention.
Authors Note: I don't own any of the labels I mentioned in this chapter, and I don't own the characters, just the plot. I don't know if there's a "Fierce Magazine" either, but if it does, then I don't own it. Can I borrow it though? :)
Oh and review please :P
Much love, ApartOfMee.