Author's note: So this is my first fic in three and a half years. Please be kind, and let me know if I should keep on going or not. If I do, I can promise an elephant in chapter three. I'm not kidding.
Also, the title may be a wee bit misleading at the moment...I promise that you'll understand when all is said and done.
Disclaimer: Don't own a damn thing. Wish I owned the elephant, though. That would be cool.
Rating: R for language, I'm guessing, 'cause....damn, bitch.
Prologue
All things considered, he should have seen it coming.
"All things," in this case, were the untrustworthiness of Julie Cooper, the immorality of Caleb Nichol, the general havoc caused by the combination thereof, Marissa's penchant for ruining his nights, the relative calm in which he had been living for the past few weeks and his own uncanny ability to have absolutely everything in his life go wrong at the exact same time.
It had started out so simply, so innocently. Kirsten had started it, in fact. Generally speaking, one could trust Kirsten.
"Ryan!" The call came from inside the kitchen. Ryan meandered in from where he had been pitting Pikachu against Yoshi in a titanic Smash Bros. grudge match and noticed that Kirsten was – there was no other way to say it – flipping out.
"Ryan, what are you doing right now? – oh, damn." This was said somewhat breathlessly, as Kirsten managed to drop an entire folder of papers onto the floor, where they skidded across the room.
"Helping you?" he guessed as he knelt down to help her gather her files.
"Oh, that would be wonderful. I wouldn't ask, only Sandy will be working late and Seth is nowhere to be found, and I've got to get these things over to the contractors or they'll never get done on time and then we won't be able to show the house on time and for some reason I can't find my keys – "
"Whoa, whoa, it's okay!" he said bemusedly, putting an end to her outburst. "What do you need me to do?"
She stopped scrabbling at papers, smiled, and grabbed an envelope from the countertop. "Just drop this check off at my office. It needs to get there today. Is that okay?"
"Yeah, sure it is," he answered, taking the check from her. "Anything else?"
"That's it. Take the Range Rover. Thank you so much, Ryan – you're a lifesaver."
"No problem. See you for dinner." He headed out the door and hopped in the Range Rover, pulled out of the driveway, and turned towards the Newport Group and Julie Cooper.
Yeah, he definitely should have seen it coming.