We never had "the talk"
AN: So I wanted to start by saying I'm overwhelmed by the response to my fic Ladies Night. You guys are awesome! I appreciate every favorite and review. So due to number of folks asking me to do a follow up or one from the guys perspective; I have decided to write a fic with the same theme. After thinking it over; I decided that alcohol would not do the trick. The women trust each and are fairly emotionally open. The men on the other hand are very much closed and emotionally damaged; so I decided the best way to get the embarrassing sex conversation going is by using the kid that doesn't know what he's saying. As always...nothing says lovin like a review ;-)
The ladies felt bad for sleeping in and moving a bit slower the net day; so they made it up to the guys by preparing them some cookie and milk. Carl was slowly coming around; having other children around him appeared to help restore some of his youthful spirit. It was easy to forget how young Carl really is. Hershel was absorbed in his daily bible study; so the guys flied into the main room separated out some cookies for him and helped themselves.
Glen smirked as he chewed on the chocolate chip goodness. "So the other night; what do you think the girls were talking about?"
Daryl had one leg resting on the end of the table while he ate. "I don't know and I don't wanna know. Probally a bunch o nonsense anyhow; they was all three sheets to the wind."
Carl perked up his head inquisitively. "What does that mean?"
Everyone got quiet and looked to Rick. Rick shot Daryl a very harsh look, to which Daryl just shrugged. Rick turned his attention back to his son and decided that he had better explain. After all the kid was capable of defending himself against human and walker threats; so he deserved an adult answer. He was trying to formulate an answer when Daryl spoke up.
"It's a term used by sailors back when boats had sails. A sheet was the rope used to secure the sails. If the sail wernt secure it was 'in the wind'. If a sailor was really drunk; his mates would say he was three sheets in the wind."
Everyone stared at him. "Shit aint yall never read a book?"
Carl nodded. "Oh, so stumbling around like those dudes on cops?"
Daryl nodded.
Carl grabbed up two more cookies and chugged his milk. "Ok; I get it. So what does it mean when someone says "her legs go all the way to the top…where do they go? The top of what?"
Glen decided to field this one. "It means that she has nice legs and that it looks like they go all the way to the top of her body. I wouldn't say that to a girl because it's kind of rude to talk about just her legs."
Carl looked to his father. "I'm sure dad didn't mean to be rude about Michonne. Her legs are really nice so it was just a complement right dad?"
Everyone shot Rick a look. He very nearly spit his drink out, leaning forward with his palm to his mouth. Taking a moment to clear his throat and think of a response, he drew in a deep breath.
"Well I mean, I'm a widow but I'm not blind or dead."
Carl raised an eyebrow. "So does that mean you like Michonne?"
Rick began to fidget in his chair; obviously uncomfortable with the subject matter.
"I like her just fine son."
Carl's eyes narrowed. "Yea but do you like her like her? You know; like Maggie and Glen."
"I don't know about all that; I was just complementing her legs...like you said."
Carl thought for a moment "Oh, ok. Do you think she likes you?"
Rick began to massage his temple, all the other men leaned in, smiling at his discomfort.
"I have no idea what she thinks about me."
Carl turned to Glen "How did you know that Maggie liked you?"
Glen quickly glanced around the room, he suddenly realized that the tables had turned on him. Given the very sexual start of his relationship with Maggie; he was racking his brain for an answer that was appropriate for someone Carl's age.
"Umm, well ah when a girl likes you, she will sometimes let you do stuff with her. Like...holding her hand or kissing her on the cheek."
Carl reflected on this while chewing yet another cookie. "When you say that girls will let you do stuff with them if they like you; dose that include tapping them?"
Glen looked confused "I guess so; but tapping?"
Carl nodded "Yea, I'm not sure why you'd want to tap a girl. Merle use to say 'He needs to quit pussyfooting around and tap that' anytime Daryl was with Carol. They hang out a lot so I figured that they like each other." Turning to Daryl "So it's cool if you wanna tap Carol; but I still don't know why you'd want to tap a girl in the first place. Unless you're playing tag."
Daryl had turn a lovely shade of fuchsia and was trying to sink into the depths of his chair with little success. All of the guys were desperately trying not to outright laugh.
"Yea Daryl; you wanna play tag with Carol?" Rick was unable to resist the dig.
"Shut the fuck up man...you know it aint like that...fucking Merle."
Carl turned back to Glen "So if you do like a girl and you wanted to do stuff with her; what do you do. I mean, did you just ask Maggie to do stuff, or what?"
Daryl jumped on the opportunity to get the focus off him.
"Yea Glen; how did you and Maggie hook up? The boy's got questions."
Glen's eyebrows rose. "Uhh...well...umm...I mean it's different for everyone. You can't really go by what me and Maggie did...not that we did anything wrong, I mean it was fast but the word did kinda go to hell...shouldn't you be having this conversation with your dad?" Glen's voice raised several octaves as he spoke.
Rick smiled and decided to give the guys a break. After all Carl was his son. "Carl if you don't mind me asking, where are these questions about girls coming from?"
At that moment; the air was filled with singing. On the upper level, Beth had emerged from on the rooms; Judith nestled in her arm.
"If I could save time in a bottle; the first thing that I'd like to do is to save everyday till eternity passes away; just to spend them with you.
If I could make days last forever; if words could make wishes come true. I'd save everyday like a treasure and then, again I would spend them with you.
But there never seems to be enough time to do the things you want to do once you find them. I've looked around enough to know that you're the one I want to go through time with."
The men were now staring up at her, totally entranced. Beth had that effect whenever she sang. Rick glanced at his companions when he noticed that Carl was almost mesmerized by her presence. Suddenly all his questions about girls was making sense.
"Oh, sorry guys. I didn't mean to bother you."
Rick called up to her. "It's no bother, we all enjoy your voice. Oh and thanks again for the cookies."
"Oh you're welcome. Well, I guess I'll go now." She quickly ducked back into a cell.
Rick took some cookies and placed them on a napkin. He gently wrapped them up and slid them in front of Carl.
"You know, I find that if I want a girl to like me; a really good start is to bring her something. Like candy or cookies maybe."
Carl's eyes lit up. He quickly snatched the napkin of cookies and turned toward the stairs. "Thanks dad" he spoke over his shoulder.
Rick grinned as he watched his son disappear into the cell that Beth had just entered.
Daryl leaned over after Carl was out of earshot. "You have got to have 'the talk' with that boy."
Glen nodded in agreement. "Yea man that was awkward. Speaking of which; what was all that about Michonne's legs?"
Rick closed his eyes, he had hoped that that part of the conversation was forgotten. No such luck.
"What, she has nice legs. I know you got Maggie and all but even you had to notice."
Glen held his hands up "Whoa, its cool man. I mean yea, she a nice looking lady. I just think it's cool that you're noticing that kind of stuff. It's a good thing." He smiled at Rick and placed a hand on his shoulder. Everyone was concerned that Rick would just shut down totally after Lori, so he knew what Glen was saying. He returned Glen's smile and glanced at Daryl.
"Yea; you know I think all that mess with the governor is behind us. It's like this is a fresh start. Seems as if there are a lot of good things going on."
Daryl quickly crammed a cookie in his mouth and mumble something under his breath. Rick just smiled and leaned back in his chair. He knew that this peace would not remain, but he was damn well going to enjoy the calm before the storm. He started to get up and then turned back to the cookies on the table. Quickly grabbing a few, he wrapped them into a napkin and walked away smiling to himself. Michonne was on watch right now, perhaps she would enjoy some cookies.
