Title: Heart Made of Glass
Summary: I could never be what eveyone wanted me to be, I tried, really, I did. I gave it everything I had, but in the end, it got me nowhere with my family and friends, That didn't matter, I would soon be what I wanted to be.
Rating: M
Pairing: Sora/Kairi if you squint really hard, but otherwise, no pairings. Not a romance story.
Author's Note:
Warning: This story contains the eating disorder know as Bulimia Nervosa and may be triggering to some people. DO NOT READ THIS IF YOU THINK YOU COULD BE AT RISK. I cannot be more serious about this people, because it's based on true events. Reader discreation is advised.
This fic is rated M and is meant for people that can deal with the events taking place. It is NOT for the weak hearted. There is no sexual content in this story, so if you are looking for that and nothing else, refer to your lovely glowing backspace arrow in the upper far left corner of you browser page.
Thank you.
She was absolutely beautiful in her little white dress. Her plain white dress was just so plain, most people walking by wouldn't even give her a second look and that was perfectly fine with her.
Not me.
She needed to be noticed.
And she was.
That's how it all started. Me, always watching her and admiring her figure from afar. I hated her so much, but I wanted to be her friend too. She had everything that I ever wanted in my appearance. Blond hair pulled to the side of her face, clear skin, pale blue eyes, pale skin, but not the sickly kind of pale that makes you look like you just crawled out of your very own death bed. Her legs her thin and smooth, she didn't have a freckle or mole in site.
She was everything that I wasn't. I had red hair, freckles everywhere, and I have a couple of moles on my legs, granted just dark freckles and nothing totally gag refluxing, it's not like there is hair growing out of them, but still, I would rather me not have fat them at all. They're so ugly on me. My thighs were fat, my upper arms were fat, I was fat.
Fat.
I told Sora that one day while I was hanging out with him at his house. We were sitting on the couch watching a movie, his feet were resting in my lap.
"Sora, I'm fat." Sora grabbed the remote and paused the movie; he then turned to look at me. I had never seen Sora glare at someone until now, which made me feel even worse.
"If you're fat Kairi, then Riku is one big ass son of bitch." I couldn't help it, I laughed. Riku was one of the skinniest guys I know, besides Axel, Sora, and Roxas, their bodies like look like a little twelve year old girls, Axel was just way taller then them.
"Sora…" I said one I was done laughing. "I'm being serious."
"So am I." Then he said it. "You know Naminé, right? I nodded. "How everyone is all flaunting about her perfect appearance. I think your appearance is just as perfect as hers. You're beautiful Kairi. Please, don't be so hard on yourself."
He was wrong, but I just nodded and we continued watching the movie.
When I got home that night, I went straight to the bathroom, turned the shower on and took my clothes off. I started at myself in the mirror, turning in every angle to look at the fat dripping off my body. I wanted to cry, so matter what type of exercise I did, it just wouldn't go away. I looked at my thighs. They were awful, so plump and gross. So I did cry, and after that, I went into the shower and throw up.
I had been throwing up my food for over two months, sure I ate a little here and there, an apple and fruit and things that wouldn't fatten me up. I had been so obsessed with my weight that I didn't notice the way my mother and father looked at me. If I had, I would have been more careful. I made sure to brush my teeth every chance I got, so my stomach acid wouldn't rot them out, but it never worked. It wasn't until I starting missing my period that I noticed that I had a problem. I could hardly get out of bed anymore or stand up for a long period of time, but I couldn't stop. All the weight needed to come off.
Here is a question for you guys. What kind of child goes up to there mother and says:
"Why did you give birth to me?"
The horrible kind, the kind that takes their mothers love for granted. Ever heard the saying; "Mother is the word of God on a child's tongue."? It's so true. Don't take anything for granted, because you will lose it and you will want it back and you will reget not loving it the way you should have.
The last thing I remember hearing was my mother calling my name over and over again, Dad calling me, Axel, Roxas, Sora and Riku busting in the room, a loud beeping sound, and nursed telling people to calm down. There were warms drops of water falling on my hand as my vision faded and I closed my eyes.
I was perfect.
