It was the first day of the semester and Steve was feeling positive about his Senior year. This was his last year and he wanted everything to be perfect. He wanted to graduate with his friends, make his parents proud and most importantly enjoy himself.
He wasn't the party type because he worked hard to get to college and didn't fancy blowing his opportunity at an education. He did, however, feel like his chances of graduating with flying colors were very high and maybe letting off some steam this year wasn't such a bad idea, as long as he found the right balance between the work load and having fun.
Steve wasn't boring, though. He did have fun with his friends by going out to eat and watching the sports teams play. They went to movies, had small gatherings in their house and hung out on campus.
The people Steve lived with and who he'd become great friends with were Thor, the jock from Sweden and his Gothic brother Loki. Thor played on the football team and Steve and he had met in their freshman year when Steve tried out for the team. Steve eventually stopped playing to focus more on his classes, but he still supported the team as if he were still playing. Loki was his step-brother who was the same age and kind of came as a package deal.
They couldn't be more different from each other if they tried. Thor had shoulder length blonde hair and a 'rough n ready' stubble that caressed his chiseled jaw line perfectly. He was also dating Jane Foster who was intelligent, hot and funny, which Steve always envied. Loki, on the other hand, had jet black hair and wore nothing but grays, blacks and dark blues. He usually kept himself to himself, but did come out and socialize with the group.
Steve's third room mate was Natasha. The pair had met in the cafeteria in their sophomore year when Natasha got into a fight with the football players. Steve had stuck up for her and calmed her down and since then they'd been pretty much inseparable. Steve knew how to handle her fierce Russian ways and Natasha was Steve's rock.
The four of them had decided to move in together and had since been the best of friends.
Steve arrived at the house they shared and had unpacked his things before going back downstairs into the kitchen where the rest of them stood, beers in hands, waiting. Natasha handed Steve a beer, flicking her red hair off her shoulder and raising her bottle.
"To our senior year!" she cheered.
The other three cheered too, each gulping down their cold beers before grabbing boxes of beer and heading out. There was the annual new school year all-day party. Luckily it took place in a few of the houses around campus as it was too cold to be partying outside.
As Thor rushed ahead with the beer, spotting his football teammates, Natasha took Steve's arm in hers and walked with him.
"It's good to be back, right?" she smiled.
"I've missed this place. I've missed all this" his free arm gesturing to the field and beautiful buildings that stood around them and Thor being tackled to the floor by the other jocks.
~
It was starting to get too cold to keep jumping from house to house so they decided to stay at Jane's. Thor was verging on paralytic but still going. Loki was on his phone, headphones on, in the corner of the room. Natasha was dancing with a couple of girls from her foreign languages and literature class and Steve was in the kitchen with a few of his history class mates. There were other people scattered around the house, music still on loud, competing with neighbors. There were faint screams and cheering from outside, fireworks being let off and 'oohs' and 'awes'
Steve excused himself from the kitchen and stood outside for a moment, watching the fireworks in the sky above. He leaned against the rail on the stairs and put his bottle to his lips, just about to take a swig, before he saw three people drunkenly staggering up the pathway, heading for the house.
"Oh my god! If it isn't Steve fucking Rogers!"
Steve knew that voice. It was Clint Barton, of course.
"My man! How, how are you?" Clint laughed as he patted him on the arm, still holding up one side of a very drunken guy in a suit.
"I'm well, thanks. I see you're enjoying your night" Steve smirked, turning his focus to the middle man.
"This fine fellow is Bruce Banner. He can't handle his shit, but he's still a god damn beast nonetheless" Clint laughed, setting Bruce down on the steps.
Steve laughed and then the third guy spoke.
"I keep telling him..." he looked down, dark eyes glinting in the light of the fireworks, his features illuminating softly. "I said, sweetie, I said, if you're going to drink, do not try and keep up with me" he laughed, kneeling down and placing his hands on Bruce's shoulders. Bruce's head dropped and he slurred something incomprehensible. Clint started laughing and made his way into the house where he was greeted by cheers.
The man stood up after a second of making sure Bruce was okay. He straightened himself out before offering his hand to Steve.
"Tony Stark" he grinned, his goatee and glasses complimented his features.
Steve took his hand in his. The guy had a firm handshake. Rough hands, workers hands, like his fathers.
"Steve. Nice to meet you" he returned the smile.
Tony took his hand back and fished a flask out of his blazer pocket. He took a big gulp and held the flask out to Steve, who shook his head, declining politely. Tony shrugged his shoulders and laughed.
"More for me, I guess"
"How come I haven't seen you before?" Steve asked, startled by his own sudden query.
"I don't know. Different majors, social circles" he took another gulp.
"But we have Clint as a mutual friend?" Steve asked, tilting his head slightly.
"Ah! Well, must have just missed each other, I guess. It's a big place" Tony rocked on his heels. He was obviously uncomfortable by Steve's questions, but Steve couldn't figure out why. "Anyway, I should really get my drunken boyfriend home. Say bye to Clint for me, and hi to Jane, will you?" Tony smiled, eyes crinkling in the corners.
"Of course. Bye, and nice to meet you" Steve said before clearing his throat and heading inside.
Steve went into the bathroom on his own. How could he have never seen Tony before? Or Bruce? His 'boyfriend'. Steve felt something in the pit of his stomach. He hoped to god it wasn't the alcohol telling him he'd had enough.
After everyone had cleared out of Jane's, Natasha and Steve left. They searched for Loki but they gathered that he must have sneaked out when no one was looking. He was good at that. Thor decided he was staying at Jane's so the pair walked home together.
Natasha was babbling on about how she couldn't stand Clint and how the thought of him being in the same room as her made her feel sick. They had dated at the beginning of college and it ended badly as Clint was found with a professor in a rather compromising position in the staff parking lot.
"Steve are you even listening?! I mean the guys a total jerk and he expects me to apologize to him for telling him to stay away from me!" Natasha moaned.
"Hey, Natasha. What do you know about Tony Stark?" he said, bluntly cutting in on her rant, making her stop in her tracks.
"Tony Stark? Why?" she narrowed her eyes at him.
"I met him tonight. Never knew he existed until tonight. I just thought it was weird, is all" Steve said innocently.
"Well. Tony Stark is fucking rich. His dad owns this weapons company. He's totally big headed, knows how much of a genius he is and gets all the guys. He's pretty rad, actually. I don't understand how you've never heard nor met him" she says, disbelief in her eyes.
"He was with his boyfriend too. Bruce Ba-"
"Banner, yes. He's this massive science geek. He's totally brilliant of course. I didn't even think Tony did boyfriends but hey, people change. They probably met through that as Tony does engineering, you know, all that mechanical stuff" she laughed, pulling on Steve's arm so they could walk again.
~
Steve laid in his bed and stared up at the ceiling. Thoughts of how he'd never met Tony before flooded his mind. How could he have never met the guy if everyone else seemed to know him? Natasha had told him how they had met at a couple of parties. She told him about how much of a player Tony was, but it was okay because he was 'totally hot' and 'totally clever' Damn, Natasha said 'totally' a lot. He rolled his eyes at the realisation and remembered the feeling of Tony's skin against his. He smiled and rolled on to his side.
History dragged on, as did Literature class and finally Steve found himself in Starbucks waiting for his coffee. As he emptied a sachet of sugar into the cup, his other hand reached for a stirrer, but instead of grabbing the stick, he felt flesh. He pulled his hand back quickly and looked up.
"Oh hey! Steve, right?" Tony said, beaming at him.
Steve flushed and cleared his throat.
"Hey" he choked, reaching for the stirrer again, this time not making any contact with Tony. "Did you and Bruce get home okay last night?" he asked, regaining his composure.
"Yeah, thanks. Was a battle, but nothing I can't handle. Just picking up some coffee for sleeping beauty" he laughed.
They started walking out of the double doors together. Seemingly headed the same way, Steve chanced a couple of looks at Tony. He was incredibly attractive. His soft facial hair complimented his olive complexion, dark eyes under long lashes and full, pink lips. His dark hair fell messily on top of his head and his body looked as if it would be sculpted and toned underneath the band tee and skinny jeans.
"Steve?" Tony interrupted his thoughts.
"Yes? Sorry" he said, flushing again.
"I asked where you were off to today" Tony laughed, taking a sip of his coffee.
"Library. Just needed a pick-me-up before getting some studying done. Hey, Tony, are you and Bruce busy tonight?" he asked, not knowing exactly where he was going with the question and where exactly it came from.
"No, not that I know of, why?" the pair stopped as they approached the entrance of the Library.
"I just thought that maybe you'd want to go for a drink with me and a couple of my friends?" he said, realizing he was biting his lip and stopping.
"Sounds awesome. What's your number? I will text you when I've woken Bruce and I'm out of the lab" Tony held out his phone, waiting for Steve.
They exchanged numbers and parted. Steve smiled at the numbers that sat underneath Tony's name and headed into the library. Sitting at the desk, books open and paper and pens scattered around them, Steve sat up abruptly. "Do I like Tony?" he breathed. His eyes widened, scoping the room to make sure no one heard him.
Of course not. He didn't even know the guy. Sure he was extremely hot, but Tony was a genius, rich, had a boyfriend and they'd only spoken twice. Steve then thought back to the feeling he had in his stomach when Tony had left Jane's. He had only felt that when he knew he couldn't have something. Jealousy.
He shook his head. No fucking way. Steve then proceeded to pack up his things off the large oak desk and hurried out of the library back to the house. He desperately hoped no one was in, and to his surprise, his wish had come true.
Throwing his bag on his bed he lunged forward and started searching his desk draws. Finally finding the thing he was looking for, he placed it on the desk and tidied up again.
Sitting at his desk, he unfolded the piece of paper he had so desperately searched for and straightened it out in front of him, placing his hands on either side of it.
"Things to do in college"
Pass every class possible
Make mom and dad proud
Make as many friends as possible before deciding which ones to move in with
Try not to party too much
If there are parties, do everything an American college student should do
Experiment with different sexual partners
Maybe have a gay experience
Don't do drugs
Join the football team
Graduate
There it was. "Have a gay experience" Fuck. He read it over and over again, then ran his hand through his soft blond hair, sighing out loud. He had written it the summer before he started college. How naïve of him. He did pretty much everything on the list, bar graduate and sleep with a guy.
Steve didn't know what this meant for him. Was this strange attraction to Tony just his subconscious reminding him he hasn't completed his silly little list that was written four years ago? Or did it go deeper? Or was it just because Tony was.. well; Tony.
He screwed up the piece of paper and threw it in the corner of the room. Confusion coursed his veins and he rubbed his eyes. Before he got up, his phone vibrated against the desk and it made him jump.
T - Bruce is alive, I'm done in the lab and we're up for that drink. Time? Place? -
S - Cool. 8 muddy Charles?
T - Sweet, see you there -
They all gathered around in a booth, bringing extra chairs over. Natasha wasn't sure about going for the drink with Tony and Bruce but Steve had managed to persuade her by promising her drinks. Thor was happy to go out, bringing Jane. Loki had locked himself in his room and Steve had also emailed Clint.
Steve knew Clint from his freshman year. They had grown apart when Steve joined the football team and he joined the archery team. They acknowledged each other whenever they saw one another but they didn't hang out. Steve had missed him, in all honesty.
After a few hours of drinking and everyone catching up, apart from Clint and Natasha, who just kept glaring at each other across the table, they were all starting to feel the effect of the alcohol, especially as they had been doing shots. Thor and Jane excused themselves.
"Right, I've had enough. I have a one thousand word assignment already and I still feel like death after last nights fiasco" Bruce announced, getting up.
"Do you want me to come with you, baby?" Tony asked, looking up at his boyfriend.
"No it's fine. I'm not going to be much company anyway. You stay. Guys, thanks and see you soon" Bruce said, bending down to kiss Tony before disappearing out of the door.
"Since when did you have boyfriends, Stark?" Natasha asked, curiously.
"Can't a guy change for the right sexual partner, ooh, I mean, for the right guy" he smirked, winking at Natasha before the table started to laugh.
"So does that mean you actually like Bruce?" Clint asked.
"It's strange, I know, but I've got feelings for this guy. He's sweet you know. And intelligent. Not as clever as I am, but he can keep up with me... in more ways than one" he grinned, flashing Steve a toothy smile.
"You put it in such a romantic way" Clint laughed.
Tony shrugged his shoulders. "My dear Clint, you should know me by now"
A couple more hours passed before Clint and Natasha eventually got sick of each other and left. Steve decided to stay, hoping Tony would too. They were alone in the booth. There wasn't many other people in the bar and the lights were dimmed, it was nearly closing time. As Steve finished up the last of his beer, Tony started to laugh.
"What?" Steve said, confused.
"Nothing. It's just. I feel stupid" Tony laughed again.
"Care to explain?" Steve encouraged.
"I lied to you. I knew who you were before we met properly yesterday. I mean, we never actually ever went to a party together or had the same classes, but I knew of you. Knew that you played on the football team, knew you do history and lit and knew that you were fucking hot. I just thought it was easier if I pretended not to know who you were. Also, you had no fucking clue who I am!" Tony laughed, necking the rest of his neat whiskey.
Steve sat silent for a moment, considering what to say. He was flattered about the 'fucking hot' comment. He didn't care that Tony had lied to him. He wouldn't have been any the wiser unless Tony had told him, but he was glad in a way that he did. He also felt embarrassed not knowing who Tony Stark was. He was basically a celebrity on campus, so he had been told by his friends. He drew a sharp breath before speaking.
"Dude, it's cool. I feel sort of stupid for not knowing who you were, if I'm being honest" he could feel the flush rising in his cheeks.
Tony laughed, looking deep into Steve's eyes, watching him sink under his gaze.
"Ah, maybe I shouldn't be so up my own ass. I'm not that special. It's just a name" he shrugged.
Steve didn't answer. He wasn't sure how to. He didn't know exactly what Tony had meant so decided it was better to just smile awkwardly before glancing over at the bartender who was obviously waiting for them to finish up so he could close the bar.
The pair decided they didn't want to finish the night yet. Tony invited Steve to his apartment off campus for a drink and Steve had accepted, a little too eagerly maybe, but who cares.
Tony's place was huge. For an apartment, it was anyway. The architecture was breath taking. They took the elevator up to the top floor before Tony typed in a code and gestured for Steve to go in first.
"So this is my humble abode" he slurred. The cold air had hit him a bit harder than expected after drinking all that whiskey.
"Sweet place" Steve said, trying to act cool. The place was fucking incredible, unlike anywhere Steve had ever seen before.
The tall white walls were covered in art and metal sculptures stood in the corners of the room, as well as a large white couch and an expensive looking plasma screen television, which Steve guessed was about fifty inches, give or take. It was all open plan and really well kept.
"What would you like to drink?" Tony said, waltzing into the kitchen.
"I don't mind" Steve said.
"Whiskey it is! Make yourself at home" Tony said as he took glasses from the cupboards and poured them each a drink.
Tony joined Steve on the couch, handing him the drink and 'cheersing' him. Steve took a big gulp. Big mistake. He managed to suffice the cough that lingered in the back of his throat. Steve felt incredibly awkward but he wanted to get to know Tony. He turned on the couch to face him and began asking him a few questions.
"How did you meet Clint?"
"He was friends with someone I was sleeping with last year. He was supposed to tell me off for ignoring his friend and instead we just kind of hit it off. He's a great guy" Tony laughed at the memory.
"And Bruce?"
"We worked together on a couple of projects. He was sweet to me, helped me when I was going through some... things" Tony put his glass on the coffee table and put his hand on the back of his neck. Steve could tell he didn't want to talk anymore about it. "So, anything else you want to know?" he smirked, a little glint in his eye that made Steve shudder.
"No. Sorry. I didn't realize I was being so interrogative" Steve laughed awkwardly.
Tony laughed before getting up and bringing the bottle over with him, pouring himself another drink. He asked if Steve wanted another but he was struggling as it was. The bottle looked vintage, very expensive.
"Now you're done, I'd love to ask you some questions" he said, a wolfish grin spreading across his face.
"Okay" Steve prepared himself.
"Why did you want to know how I met Bruce?" his face turning serious.
"Oh, um. I don't know. I guess just because you were talking about him earlier. I just wondered, is all. Sorry if I over-stepped a line or anyth-"
"No, no! It's nothing like that. It's cool, you were just being nosy" Tony laughed, taking a sip.
"I'm sorry" Steve blushed.
Tony put his hand on Steve's.
"You really need to stop blushing, honey... You're not as innocent as you come across, are you, Steve" he said with a wink.
It only made him blush more. He could feel the intense look in Tony's dark eyes. He felt really lightheaded and put his glass down. He stared at Tony's hand, which was still upon his. He then looked up into Tony's eyes and before he realized it, he had pressed his lips against Tony's and they were kissing each other hard, ripping at their clothing. Tony had dropped his glass on the rug, spilling the whiskey on the white fur. Steve could feel his heart pounding in his ears as he pushed Tony's shirt over his shoulders and began kissing his neck, down to his collarbones. Tony was undoing his pants and pulling them down, then proceeding to do the same to Steve. The pair had started to kiss each other upon the lips once more and then Steve ran his fingertips down Tony's torso and fingered the waistband on Tony's boxers, teasing him.
Tony moaned into Steve's mouth, spurring him to carry on. He slipped his hand underneath the material and took him in his hand. He slowly started to stroke his length as Tony breathed harder and slid his tongue into Steve's mouth deeper.
The buzzer rang loudly throughout the apartment, making them both jump and stop what they were doing. Tony realized it could only be one person and quickly began getting his clothes back on.
"Fuck, Steve. You need to fucking leave. Fuck, how did I let this happen?" Tony panicked, dressing and running over to the phone.
Steve gathered his clothes and tried to get rid of his hard on. Dressing as quickly as humanly possible, he patted down the couch that looked more fucked than he did, unfortunately, and stood awkwardly waiting for Tony to stop talking to Bruce on the other end of the line.
"Tony, I..." Steve started.
"No. Not now. Not here. Meet me in the library tomorrow at four" Tony said, his eyes were wide.
"Sure" Steve said before the door opened and Bruce stood puzzled before him.
"Hey, Steve" Bruce said, almost as a question.
"Steve came over for a drink after the rest left. Wanted to know more about the Stark trade" he lied.
Bruce relaxed and smiled, moving past Steve and Tony and into the apartment. Tony visibly relaxed and his eyes gestured for him to leave. Steve nodded, mouthing 'sorry' before leaving through the door. Tony closed the door a little harder than expected and turned back to see Bruce spread out on the couch. He smiled and went over to him, offering him a drink. Bruce looked tired, Tony knew he wasn't getting laid.
How the fuck did that just happen? Steve cursed himself. He had goosebumps but didn't know if it was from the near-sexual-experience with Tony, being busted by Bruce or the sudden cold air on his skin. He decided upon all three. He rushed home and got into bed, thinking about how Tony felt in his hand and began to jerk himself off.
Time couldn't go quick enough. After he finished up in the lab, Tony looked at the clock for the hundredth time that day and made his way over to the library. Steve was sat on a desk in the corner. He pulled up a chair opposite Steve and they sat in silence for a while before he opened his mouth but instead of words coming out of his mouth, Steve was the one talking.
"Look, I'm sorry about last night. I don't know what I was thinking. I understand if you are angry at me. I don't want to come in between you and Bruce. Like, I know I was the one that made a move so I hope you don't feel like it was your fault. I take full responsibility and it won't happen again" Steve apologized.
Tony sat, still open mouthed, absorbing everything he had just heard. He felt a pang of disappointment in his chest and nodded. What he felt with Steve was overwhelming. He'd seen him around before, noticed how undeniably good looking he was. He had wanted him for a long time, fantasied about him. But he never knew he would have an opportunity to actually talk to him, let alone almost have sex with him. He also couldn't believe that it would happen whilst he, of all people, was in a relationship.
Bruce's and his relationship was good. It was strong. Stronger than any of his other attempts at being monogamous. He cursed himself for letting Bruce down. He had been there for Tony through his lowest points and this was how he repaid him. It wasn't fair on Bruce. But Steve. Steve was breath-taking. He was beautiful and Tony just couldn't help himself as he looked into Steve's bright pools of blue.
"It was both of our faults. I'm sorry. Don't completely take the blame. I should've stopped you. But, I, I..." he stopped, not wanting Steve to know about his long-term crush on the blond.
"What did Bruce say?" Steve asked.
"Nothing. He came over to sleep as he sleeps better knowing I'm okay" Shit, he'd said too much.
Steve looked at him hard. It made Tony uncomfortable, as he shifted in his seat.
"Look. I can tell whatever you and Bruce have between you is between you, but just know that you can talk to me. I'm quite a trustworthy guy" Steve smiled.
"I know. I'm sorry. Maybe we should just forget it happened. It's easier that way" Tony said. He was lying of course. It wasn't going to be easier, but he couldn't face telling Bruce.
"Okay. Good. Can we still be... friends?" Steve asked, tilting his head in the most adorable but concerned way.
"I'd like that" Tony bit his lip, trying to push the flashbacks of last night out of his mind.
Almost a month passed and it was coming up to Halloween. There were a few parties going on that the group had been invited to and Thor was more excited than anyone. He loved dressing up and it put everyone in a good mood. They had decided to go to one of Thor's football buddies parties and the theme was 'superheroes' They spent a couple of days planning their costumes and decorating their house in fake spiderwebs and pumpkins with candles melting wax all over the place.
When the 31st rolled round, Thor was literally bouncing off the walls.
"I would like to express to the house that tonight will be one of the greatest nights in our college career. I'd like to raise this glass in honor of our final Halloween together and I must say, we look mighty fine in our superhero clothing!" He toasted, lifting his glass, encouraging everyone else to do the same.
They got to the party and it was in full swing. They quickly dispersed into separate groups and Steve found himself in the kitchen with a bottle of beer in his hand, scanning the room. There was no sign of Tony, though he wasn't sure if he even knew about this party. They hadn't seen each other in a couple of weeks as Tony had been really busy with his latest project, but they had shared the occasional text. Steve pulled out his phone.
S - We're at a party where the theme is superheroes. It would be great to see you. -
T - Call me in about ten minutes -
Steve suddenly felt worried. He didn't know why but there was a strange feeling pulling in his chest that suggested Tony might be in trouble. He shrugged it off and downed his beer, hoping it would give him the confidence to call him. Not seeing him for a while had made him anxious and talking to people on the phone panicked him even more.
Ten minutes had passed and Steve took a sharp breath, exhaled slowly and pressed call.
"Hello, Tony?"
"Hiya"
"You okay?"
"Yes, fine. Um, Could you... could you come over?" Tony choked into the phone.
"Is everything okay? You sound upset" Steve asked.
"Please come over" Tony pleaded.
"Yeah, yeah sure. Be there as soon as I can"
Tony buzzed him into the apartment and as soon as Steve stepped through the door, he immediately ran over to Tony who was crying into his hands on the couch. He looked up when he felt Steve hover over him. Red cheeks and watery dark eyes met Steve's shocked expression, making Tony look down and cry even harder.
Steve sat behind Tony on the couch and pulled him into his muscly chest. He didn't mind that Tony had almost soaked his shirt as he rocked to and fro with him in his arms, trying to sooth him. He kissed the top of his head and buried his nose in Tony's hair.
"I'm such a terrible person, Steve" Tony breathed through short, sharp intakes of air. His lip still trembling as he turned and looked at Steve.
"No you're not, Tony. You're brilliant. What's happened?" Steve said, taking Tony's hands in his.
Something caught his eye. He hadn't looked around the apartment when he'd first come in. It was a complete mess. The coffee table had been moved over to the other side of the room, broken glass laid on the floor and books and pillows were darted around the room.
"What happened, Tony?" he begged for an answer.
"Bruce and I broke up" he said, wiping his eyes.
"What? Why?!" he gasped.
"Because I fucked up" he looked down.
Steve stroked his fingers with his own. He really didn't want to see Tony like this. It was heart breaking. Spending time away from Tony had really got to him. It had made him realize how much he did enjoy spending time with him and how much he liked him. He didn't say anything to Tony because he didn't want to ruin his relationship. A selfish part of him did, but Steve wasn't that guy. He was somewhat innocent and caring. Not home-wrecking and untrustworthy.
Taking his hands back, Tony sat at the other end of the couch and brought his knees up to his chin. His lip had stopped trembling and Steve got up to get him a tissue. Sitting back down and handing him a box of Kleenex, he smiled weakly, trying to comfort his friend.
"I told him about us, Steve. What happened. He flipped the fuck out. Which I get, but fuck. Look at this place" he looked around, Steve's eyes following.
"Wait. Why did this even happen? What started it off?" Steve said, trying to get the story straight in his head before panic set in.
"We were having a drink after dinner and, oh god it sounds so fucking stupid to say it out loud" Tony took a deep breath and continued, throwing his head back. "Bruce hasn't wanted to have sex in so long. He kept saying he was tired all the time and how he was stressed about his work. He knows how sexual I am and I got shitty with him. He said I shouldn't be so immature and how sex shouldn't define me as that's why I've never been in a real relationship before. I just snapped and told him that if he paid me any attention, I wouldn't have to stray... I know, it just came out and then he asked me if I had fucked anyone and I told him about what happened between us. I said it was me that made a move, and that you freaked out. He got crazy and started throwing shit before leaving" Tony said, his voice trembling.
Steve sat quietly, taking it all in. He felt awful for Tony taking the blame though he was the one that had initiated that night. Bruce deserved the truth but looking around it kind of scared him. He moved closer to Tony and put his hands on his shoulders.
"I'm sorry you felt like you should take all the blame" Steve breathed, moving his hands up Tony's neck.
"I wouldn't want you to get hurt because of something I took part in and.. enjoyed just as much. Bruce is the sweetest guy but he can flip just like that. Fuck Steve, I just feel so awful. Maybe I do let sex define me. Maybe I'm not cut out for relationships or worthy of love or-"
Steve cut him off with a firm kiss. Tony pulled away and blinked hard before taking his face between his hands and kissing Steve back.
"You're very worthy of love, Tony. Don't say things like that" Steve breathed as he kissed him again.
Tony pulled away and gave him a faint smile. He mouthed 'thank you' and looked down into his lap. Steve then used his fingertips to guide Tony's chin so he would look up and there eyes met. Steve bit hit lip and it drove Tony wild. He pulled him into a passionate kiss and they began undressing before Tony stopped Steve once more. He sunk back into the couch but Tony shook his head and stood up, extending his hand. Steve took it and Tony led him into his bedroom.
Pushing Steve down onto the bed and watching his blond hair sweep across his forehead, his eyes intense, hot, he climbed seductively on to the bed and pressed his body down on to the perfectly sculpted muscles Steve bared under his shirt. Tony began kissing him hard, first on the lips and then he made his way down his neck, sucking his warm skin, taking it between his teeth playfully. Steve let out a moan that sent a wave of pleasure down Tony's spine and he craved the sound almost instantly again.
"Are you sure you want to do this?" Steve said, trying not to ruin the moment, but also not take advantage of the situation.
Tony kissed him on the lips again, nodding before pushing himself up and taking his shirt off. He then tugged Steve's t-shirt over his head and marveled his perfect athletic build before running his tongue down Steve's torso, to his 'V'.
Quickly un-buttoning his jeans and taking his boxers down at the same time, Tony revealed Steve's impressive cock and smiled, flashing a hungry look at Steve. He discarded the rest of Steve's clothing and began to stroke his length, rubbing his thumb over the end of Steve's cock. He wanted to take his time as this was what he had fantasized about ever since seeing him and he would treat the moment like it would never happen again. He wanted the blond beauty to enjoy Tony's touch and revel in his pleasure.
Throwing his head against the pillow and closing his eyes as tight as he could, he bit his lip to contain the outbursts of pleasure he was building. He had wanted Tony like this for a long time. Even if it was under an awful situation, he looked past it because being with Tony in this moment was worth it.
Tony took Steve in his mouth, still holding onto the base of Steve's cock, slightly jerking it as he ran his tongue along Steve's impressive size and sucked, expertly. Steve tightened a grip around the bed sheets and bit his lip, trying not to let out a sound. He could feel the intensity of his climax building. Tony sucked and licked Steve, dragging out the pleasure, aching himself but wanting to make Steve come.
Steve finally came, giving into the moans that had overtook his ability to speak and Tony swallowed, wiped his mouth and released him from his grip. He then slid up Steve's body, his hard on digging into Steve's hip and kissed him on the lips.
Looking down and seeing how hard Tony was made Steve tingle with excitement. He had made Tony hard like that and he wanted to take care of it. He took Tony in his hand and began jerking him, gently, then working faster whilst Tony let out throaty moans. Steve kissed along his collarbones as he took Tony to climax and ended with a deep, wet, passionate kiss on Tony's lips before they both sank on to the bed, thoroughly fucked.
The buzzer awakened Tony and he looked around the dark room and then to the alarm clock that showed Three A.M. His eyes adjusted and he saw the outline of Steve's naked body laying face down on the mattress, fast asleep. He smiled and lost himself in the perfection of the man beside him before being disturbed once more by the buzzer.
"Who the fuck is this?" Tony hissed down the phone.
"To- Tony, it's me. Please let me in. Fuck, just fucking let me in. I. I need to, to. Tony, talk to you" Bruce slurred down the phone.
Sheer panic spread through Tony's entire body as he realized the very reason Bruce had stormed off was laying in his bed, naked.
"No. Come back tomorrow when you're sober" Tony said, gathering all the energy he could to turn Bruce away. His stomach was in knots, vomit threatening him as sweat beads gathered on his forehead.
"But Tony, I loooove you. I need you and I I am so f-f-fucking sorry, baby" he hiccuped, sadness corrupting his voice.
"Please don't do this, Bruce. Come back tomorrow"
Something snapped in Bruce once more. "He's fucking there isn't he?!"he demanded.
"Just go" Tony spat hanging up the phone. He fell to the floor, clutching at the air. What the fuck was Tony Stark going to have to do to get out of this one?
Sunshine streamed through the half-open blinds and blinking hard, Steve rolled over and found he was in an empty bed. He got up quickly and began dressing before leaving the room and heading for the kitchen.
"Hello? Tony?" he called out.
"Oh hey, Steve. Made coffee, help yourself" Tony said, peering at him from over the top of the paper. It made him look older than he was and Steve laughed to himself.
"How are you?" Steve asked, placing himself down on the stool next to Tony behind the breakfast bar.
"Yes, fine. Well. Bruce came by early this morning but I didn't let him in. He guessed you were here, though"
Steve shot him a worried look before taking a long swig of his coffee. Fuck, what if Bruce cornered him as he left the apartment? He shook his head, trying to settle his nerves. He had made his bed, and he would have to lay in it.
"It's fine. Just go about your usual day and I will give you a call later, yeah?" Tony said, interrupting Steve's thoughts.
Steve left after drinking his coffee, kissing Tony on the lips gently beforehand.
He kept his head down as he went across campus to his Literature class. Natasha stopped him before he went through the classroom door and pulled his arm so he crashed against the wall. She stood in front of him, expression unreadable.
"Where were you last night?" she narrowed her eyes at his, holding his arm.
"Nat, I'm late... I've, I've got to go..." he stammered.
"No, Steve. Where were you? You never stay out. I was worried. You didn't call and I left you a voice message. Wait... did you get laid?" she smirked, loosening her grip. She could tell by Steve's expression that he did and she stepped back, shocked. "Who?!" she said, realizing she was too loud and instantly covered her mouth with her hand and looking round.
"Meet me after class and I will tell you everything" he whispered, her forehead tightened but she nodded, moving back again and gesturing him to go into his class.
He didn't know what he was going to tell her, but she'd always been understanding before. Surely she wouldn't be any different about this? Whatever 'this' was.
Bruce brushed past Tony as he was let into the apartment. His face was more hurt than angry and Tony's stomach started to knot again. He felt the lump in his throat rising before closing the door and waiting for Bruce to say something. Bruce stood, his long dark hair, tinted with a slight gray (which Tony had always like, it showed experience and intelligence in his eyes. It made Bruce look older, but in an attractive way) and he buried his hands deep in his tweed jacket pockets.
Taking a deep breath, Tony stood opposite him and put his hand on the back of his neck about to say something to break the silence until Bruce shot him a glare and shook his head. Tony looked down, embarrassed. He just wanted it to be over with.
Bruce paced the room, putting his fingertips on his chin, stroking his stubble. He then stopped and turned sharply, taking a deep breath before moving closer to Tony. Out of instinct, Tony jumped back causing Bruce to lower his gaze to the floor and turn around again, his back to Tony.
"I don't know what I'm doing, Tony. I didn't mean to flip out last night. I just need to know one thing" he murmured before turning round again and looking at Tony, who looked frightened by the man who he once saw a future with. Tony's silence hinted for Bruce to carry on.
"I just want to know why you would choose him over all the guys you know would jump at the chance to have you for the night" Bruce said in a blisteringly cold voice.
"I. It's Steve Rogers. He's the fantasy. I'm sorry, Bruce" Tony forced.
"Don't say sorry when I know you're not" Bruce spat.
"Are we done?" Tony said, folding his arms, a slight tinge of anger in his tone. He couldn't help but try and be cruel to be kind. It was his motto when ending things that cut him up inside. He never really had feelings for people but if he felt a slight bit more for someone, it scared him and he pushed that person away. Bruce was his first real boyfriend and after four months of being happy, Tony realized that it wasn't enough.
"If that's what you want, then yes. I'm sure you and 'the fantasy' will be very happy together. Bye Tony" Bruce said, moving past him to open the door. It shook Tony off balance and he stumbled back with a small gasp.
"I am sorry, Bruce"
"Fuck you, Tony"
Finishing up in lit, Steve was first out the door and he basically ran home. Natasha was sitting on the couch reading a poetry book, the TV flickering on mute. She took her reading glasses off and patted the seat next to her for Steve to join her. He slung his bag over the banister and sat next to her. She smiled and then began the interrogation.
"Who was it?"
"Tony Stark"
After the initial shock, she gathered herself and asked a few more questions. Steve told her about what had happened and she sat in silence, hands on her face as Steve rambled on about what it all meant.
"Wait, hold up. So you like, totally did it?" she questioned, almost laughing.
"No, like, we did stuff, but... What does that matter? The point is I've ruined a relationship!" Steve argued.
"If the relationship was okay, Tony wouldn't have bothered with you in the first place. He obviously likes you enough to realize that the relationship with Bruce was done" Natasha reasoned.
Steve sunk into the couch and she moved in closer to him, putting her head on his shoulder. He let out a long sigh before saying "Do you think I've made a mistake?"
"Do you like him?" she asked.
"Yes" the realization had hit him whilst he'd been in his class, drawing himself and Tony on scrap paper. He really liked him. He just hoped that Tony wasn't going to use him for sex like he had done with others before he was with Bruce. He hoped that he'd be enough for Tony.
"Then you do what makes you happy, dude"
They hadn't seen each other in a couple of days. They didn't text or call or even run into each other by chance. Steve assumed Tony was dealing with the break-up in his own way and didn't want to push him to answer questions he wasn't sure he could bring himself to ask.
Tony drank on his own in his apartment and didn't go to any of his classes. He didn't know what he wanted and talking to Steve was on a long list of things he couldn't cope with just yet.
Another couple of days went past before Natasha came home and announced that Bruce had dropped out of college to finish his year somewhere else. Steve felt a pang of guilt and went up to his room. He laid on his bed cursing himself for getting himself into the situation. Out of the corner of his eye, he spotted the screwed up ball of paper and got up to read it again.
In that moment he wished he was that naïve eighteen year old again. Putting the paper on his bedside table, he breathed out a long sigh, running his hands over his face and digging the palms of his hands into his eyes.
"Hey dude, we're going for a drink. Fancy tagging along?" Natasha asked, startling him.
"Not really. I'm going to chill out, you know, get my head straight, figure out my next move" he smiled weakly as she nodded.
She then moved forward and pulled him into her. Natasha wasn't a hugging person. She listened to people's problems, would give her advice, but she didn't do touchy-feely-things. Only with Steve was it an exception. She rubbed his back and looked up at him after breaking away.
"You'll sort it out, you're a smart guy. And he'll come to you, just give him time. He is totally crazy if he doesn't! Anyway, see you later, yeah?" she smiled, hopeful that it would at least cheer him up.
"Thanks, Nat. See you later" he said, giving her another smile before she turned and left, closing his door behind her.
He then pulled out his phone and started a text to Tony but couldn't get himself to send it. Throwing himself back onto his bed, he was again startled by a knock at the door. He assumed he was alone when he's heard the front door slam. "Come in" Steve said, a little worried about who was behind it.
To his surprise, Loki stood in the doorway, dressed in black, eyeliner around his pale blue eyes. Steve sat up and gave him a look of confusion.
"Steve" he said in a quiet voice, then clearing his throat he carried on. "I just wanted to say that I know a lot about what goes on in this place and I wanted you to know that you shouldn't blame yourself for others problems. Of course you could've handled things differently, in a better manner. But you're not a bad person, I hope you find happiness with Anthony" he said, a strange look spread across his face like he was harboring a secret.
"Um, thanks, Loki?" Steve said, a dumbfounded look still plastered on his face.
Loki nodded before closing the door again. Steve shook his head in disbelief. Did that really just happen? He laid back down. How come everyone wants him to be happy with Tony when he doesn't even know what he wants. Sure he likes the guy but how could they ever be together when they had hurt Bruce so badly. And then there's that saying 'if they cheat with you, they'll cheat on you' Steve felt exhausted by it all and decided to take his mind off it with mindless sitcoms.
Just as he sat on the couch, a knock came from the door. Steve stiffened before moving slowly over to the door. Opening it in, he was met by a very drunk Tony, who stumbled forwards, and fell into Steve's arms. Tony had passed out. Steve could smell the whiskey pouring off him and laid him on the couch, putting a couple of cushions beneath his head before getting a couple Advil and a glass of water. He watched him sleep, checking on him occasionally and making sure he was breathing. He watched him for two hours before Tony finally stirred and let out a groan of discomfort.
"Where, where the fuck am I?" he slurred, trying to move off the couch.
"Tony, you're at mine, at Steve's" the blonde reassured.
"Oh.. oh. I'm sorry" Tony whined, covering his face with his hands.
Steve moved over to him and took his hands away from his face, kissing his forehead.
"It's fine... Here, have some water" Steve passed the pills and water, helping Tony sit up.
"I'm really sorry for coming over. I was feeling low and it just seemed like a good idea. I didn't mean to intrude. I'll go if you want" he muttered, trying to get up off the cream couch.
"No, don't go. I want to look after you. You're not intruding at all" Steve said, a little too hastily.
Tony leaned back, thankful that he didn't have to walk when he head felt like it had been hit with a bag of bricks. His mouth was dry and he clutched at the water again, drinking it down and breathing out in satisfaction. Steve watched him intently. He had looked so cute asleep.
"Look, I know I've not been in contact, but I've been... I'm not going to lie, I've been drinking myself stupid trying to figure out what the fuck I am doing with my life" Tony said, truthfully.
"And?"
"And what?"
"What have you decided to do about it?" Steve asked, worry catching in his throat.
"I've decided that... I want you to be in it at least" Tony said, his cheeks tinting pink.
Steve let out a sigh of relief before saying "I'm glad you want me to be in it. I was starting to worry that you thought you'd made a mistake the other night"
"I've liked you since forever, there's no way what happened was a mistake. Not in my eyes, honey. So, what do you say?" Tony said, looking at Steve so intensely that it made Steve shudder in excitement.
"I'm happy if you're happy, Tony" he smiled, biting his lip.
"Sweet" Tony said, beaming at him.
They didn't talk about Bruce leaving, it seemed they both understood the reasons and it was pointless to talk about it when it would only upset them. The pair, instead, focused on getting to know each other better. They went on dates, out with friends, to parties. They went for dinners in expensive restaurants that Tony paid for and drove around exploring in Tony's Jag. Steve was comfortable in Tony's company and enjoyed every second they spent together.
One night after a party, the pair decided to go back to Steve's place as it was closer to stumble back to. They giggled as Steve pulled Tony up the stairs and into his bedroom. They usually spent their time together at Tony's as there were no distractions and they could be alone. They began undressing each other in a sloppy manner and laid down on Steve's bed. Kissing each other deeply, running hands and drunken fingertips over each others flesh, they decided there first 'time' should be when they were sober and instead Tony gave Steve a blowjob and they spooned until they slept.
Steve woke to an empty bed. He looked over at the space where Tony had been and reached over to pick up his phone off the bedside table. His stomach dropped as he saw a piece of paper that he'd put there a few days ago. Fuck.
Underneath where it had said 'Maybe have a gay experience" Tony had written in sloppy handwriting:
"Wow, I guess you can tick this off your list now, Steve"
Steve threw himself out of bed and scrambled for clothes before running out of the house and heading over to Tony's. He buzzed the door but there was no answer. He took his phone out of his jean pockets.
S - I'm sorry, it's not what you think. I wrote that four years ago. I didn't mean for you to see it. It meant nothing. You mean everything, please Tony. Please believe me -
S - Where are you?
S - Tony please answer me. I've tried to call three times. I'm at your apartment.
Steve didn't get a reply. He sat outside Tony's apartment for an hour before the dark haired man turned up. Steve jumped up but Tony put his hand out to stop him from speaking and shook his head. He tapped in the code to let himself up and held the door open for Steve, still not saying a word.
He gestured for Steve to sit down and then disappeared into his bedroom. When he came back he had a notepad and a set of pens in his hand. He laid them on the coffee table in front of Steve, who was looking at him with a confused expression.
"I want you to write a new list of goals, then say why you want to achieve them.. No, don't say anything. Think hard and long. I'm going to make some dinner. Pasta okay?" he said, no readable expression on his face, but a little glint in his eye that knew Tony was serious. Steve swallowed hard and nodded.
Tony fumbled around in the kitchen, cussing as he spilled pasta shells, burnt himself and dropped a plate. Finally, he had finished dinner. He put the plates down on the breakfast bar, with a glass of water and summoned Steve who had been waiting patiently after doing as Tony had told him to.
"Looks great" Steve managed, still not sure how Tony was feeling about everything.
Tony didn't say anything and they ate in silence, occasionally brushing elbows and apologizing to one another. Tony took the plates when they were both finished, washed them up and then took a bottle of wine from the refrigerator and poured them both a glass. He then swayed over to the coffee table and picked up the finished list. He began to read aloud:
"Things I want to do in the future"
Graduate. I want to graduate because that's what I came to college to do. I want to achieve my grades and go onto finding a placement in a high school and become a teaching assistant, eventually furthering my learning and becoming a teacher myself. I'm undecided about what I'd like to teach.
I want to continue to make my parents proud of me because they put me through college and I owe it to them.
Apologize. Tony, I'm sorry. I want a future with you. You aren't a tick next to a stupid four year old, naïve number on a list. You're more than that. You've let me in to your world and every moment I spend with you i feel incredible and i feel like I'm actually being myself. I feel like I know you better than any of my friend and I've fallen for you. I want to be with you...
Tony looked at him, his eyes welling up. He dropped the list and set his wine down before taking Steve in his arms and kissing him tenderly. He eventually stopped for air and Steve looked up at the man who had made his heart stutter.
"I know it's not been easy, but I adore being in your company. I know it also hasn't been that long that we've known each other, but from what I've learned about you, I really like you. And to be honest, and I hope you feel the same way, but I would go as far as saying that, well, Tony, I think I love you" Steve whispered.
Tony's jaw dropped. His eyes buried into Steve, but a smile tugged at his lips and he kissed Steve hard again, taking his breath away. Tony broke for breath and held Steve tightly against him, their heart beats synchronizing as they stood in silence. Tony took a breath before leaning into Steve's ear and saying "I love you too, Mr Rogers"
The rest of the year was perfect. Steve and Tony were inseparable and the house mates had accepted him. Clint and Natasha had even made up and Steve had suspicions they were together again but didn't press Natasha on the subject. He couldn't be happier with his life; his classes were going well, he had brilliant and accepting friends and Tony was the best part of his happiness. Loki started hanging out with them all too, to Thor's surprise, but he was glad that he was finally joining in. "Better late than never"
Graduation was drawing closer and everyone was starting to get emotional. They were preparing to say their goodbyes, getting everything in order. Natasha had decided to go traveling for a year before deciding her next step and Thor, Jane and Loki were going to Sweden to live and find work. Steve had got himself a placement at a high school in New York and Tony was going to work at his fathers company, which was located in New York, also, so when Tony suggested they lived together, Steve was ecstatic.
The day of graduation was a beautiful summers day in June. As the friends took their seats on the field where the event was taking place, Steve scanned the parents seats for his mom and dad. He spotted them and his mom had a tissue pressed to her cheek already, pride oozing from her being, his father smiling with just as much pride written across his face. He waved at them before sitting down. Tony did the same, spotting his mother sitting on the phone to someone, his dad on a hand held. Typical, but at least they were there.
After receiving their certificates, the students threw their caps in the air for a photo. Tony grabbed Steve in amongst the red caps falling from the sky and kissed him on the lips.
"Well done, honey" Tony smiled as he broke away.
"And you, Tony" he smiled back, breathless.
That night, Steve and Tony made the best love they had ever made before falling asleep in each others arms, completely, comfortably, beyond satisfied.
~End~