A present for MayAlice on tumblr for the Captain Swan Secret Valentine! You wanted Hogwarts AU, this is what I came up with! :) Hope you enjoy!
Emma sits outside, leaning against a tree while picking the grass. Being early March, the grass is only starting to peek up through the murky brown of the dirt. It amuses Emma, that such small amounts of rebirth can happen, little bits of magic in the world where she is surrounded by magic.
Hogwarts castle looms high above her, it's turrets and towers casting shadows along the courtyard. It's a beautiful sight, but it is also bittersweet. Emma should be in class, listening to Professor Flitwick talk about advanced charms, teaching her things she definitely needs to know for her N.E.W.T.S. next month. But she isn't – because it's the first nice day after the snow melted. And because she has too much on her mind with their last Quidditch game tomorrow.
The game is important – it will be her legacy – the first time in over a hundred years that Gryffindor will win a Quidditch Cup for ten years in a row. Well, the first time they will win if Emma manages to rally her team properly. They've been playing great, really, making it this far with only a few near misses. But their last game had one of their chasers get injured, and with the head-shot she was taken off of Quidditch for the season. So now they must play the last game without one of their own, their back-up chaser not really meshing perfectly with the team.
But really, moreso than being worried about losing the game, Emma is worried about what comes after. Because this is really the last shot at being a kid, the last shot of fitting in somewhere and having a home. After this game, they have to gear up for N.E.W.T.s and finals, then job interviews with the Ministry and beyond, and everything she knows about life will change. She just – she doesn't want to think about any of that. And especially doesn't want to think about charms class, or learning how to add animate features to inanimate objects. Mostly, though, she doesn't want to think about how this will be the last time she gets to play Quidditch alongside Killian Jones.
Because she knows for a fact her best friend of 7 years, the one friend she made in her first year of Hogwarts, the guy she thinks she wouldn't be able to live without, is heading to a life of stardom. Scouts are coming to their game – they want to see the great Killian Jones in action. Want to see him block and deflect and just survive his way through a game. Killian is a keeper who doesn't let anything through, and he likes to show off a little, and he'd be great on any professional quidditch team. But with professional quidditch comes travel, and with travel comes leaving your best friend, and Emma is just not ready.
So she is avoiding everything by just picking at the grass, like any normal 17 year old witch who's entire life is about to change in a few short hours would do.
"Swan!" Emma hears, not looking up from the piece of grass she is playing with, but a smile forming on her face. "Shouldn't you be in charms?"
"And shouldn't you be getting your, what do you call it-" Emma pauses, looking up at Killian with a smirk, "good luck? From some fifth or sixth year? Who was it before the last game, that girl Tink from Hufflepuff?"
"Oh, Emma," Killian says, plopping himself down on the grass next to Emma. "It's our final game tomorrow. All the luck I need is sitting right next to me."
Emma lets out a snort, her arm involuntarily coming out to give her best friend a shove. "Yeah, well, I am not sucking face with you to pass on that luck. I'm going to keep it for myself, thank you very much."
"I wasn't – I didn't –" Killian lets out a huff, not finishing his sentence. Emma doesn't look back at him, too scared to see the truth written on his face. They've been dancing around this for a while, the comradery between them. The flirtation. The something more that Emma has been avoiding for the past two years.
It was easy when at every turn she would find Killian sucking face with some other student. Easy to forget him during her trysts with August or Graham (whom she totally would've kept dating if only he wasn't two years older and graduated already). But now – with so much standing on this game, and so much standing on the next few months - now it is hard to ignore just how hard her heart is beating with Killian sitting next to her. Hard to ignore the way he smells – something oddly Killian beneath the layers of robes. Hard to ignore the blush she can just see peeking around his ears as she finally bears to look at him.
"Emma, you know I didn't mean-" he starts, trying to ease the tension. Emma doesn't let him finish, grabbing his hand and holding it in hers.
"I know," she says, looking down at their now joined hands. "I'm just… I don't know. Scared. Worried. Nervous. So I think I need to hold onto my luck, thank you."
Killian frowns, rearranging himself so he can lean against the tree as well, forcing Emma to be half leaning on his chest. All the while, he doesn't let go of her hand.
"What are you scared about? The game? We are playing Slytherin, and they haven't beaten us all year. We've already won this cup."
Emma sighs, shaking her head. She leans her head back, and pulls their joined hand around so that they are now entwined in a half-hug. "It's not the game. It's what comes after the game."
"The party?" Killian asks. Emma wants to respond, but it takes her a moment. Killian has started rubbing his hand up and down her palm, drawing small little patterns. "I know you hate them, love, but for once maybe staying more than five minutes could do you some good?"
Emma knows Killian is smirking behind her, but it doesn't brighten her spirits like it normally would.
"No, not the party. More, life. The world after Hogwarts. Having to go be a lost girl again." She sighs, trying to figure out her thoughts, but gets distracted again. It seems Killian is writing out some sort of message on her palm. "And would you stop doing that? You're distracting me."
"Sorry!" Killian's hand jumps back, leaving Emma's hand and moving instead to sit next to them on the grass. It's things like this that make Emma question her entire relationship with Killian – make her question if he likes her as more than a friend. If he'd be willing to –
Emma pushes herself up, standing and taking a step or two away from the tree they were leaning on. She cannot let her mind trail to those thoughts, not the day before the big game. And definitely not while pretty much laying on Killian's lap.
It takes a moment, but Killian is standing next to her before Emma can really get her mind moving again.
"Swan," he says, "you won't be a lost girl again. Not while I'm here to find you, okay?"
"Can we at least be lost together? Because I feel very lost about the future." Emma replies, and she relaxes when she sees a sparkle return to Killian's eye.
"Oh, absolutely!" he says, the exuberance of her best friend returning. "It'll be brilliant. Swan and Jones, taking on the world! Exploring new things, failing in jobs at the ministry, taking on evil at every turn!"
Killian pulls out his wand, twirling in a weird sort-of pattern and swishing at imaginary bad guys.
"You're an idiot," Emma says, but watching Killian jump around has an air of fun to it. Emma can't help it – she lets out a loud laugh, then pulls her wand out too and joins in.
"Just when Jones thinks he is in too much trouble, there is Swan, jumping in to get him out of the dirt!" She cries, laughter ringing free. She and Killian continue for a few moments, both jumping around, coming up with crazier and crazier stories and situations they could be in.
"Emma Swan runs into Harry Potter, helps him cross the street using a freezing charm on the muggle cars!" Killian cries.
"Jones wins his second Quidditch World Cup, but forgoes the winnings to sail around the world instead!"
The tales spin higher and higher, to a point where Emma is laughing so hard she is tearing, and unable to stand straight. When she finally rights herself, Killian is just a foot away, his eyes shining with a smile.
"Don't worry, Emma," he says, pulling her in for a hug. His voice is infinitely quieter when he talks again, "with you and I together, there is nothing that can stop us."
Emma nods into the embrace, her arms encircling Killian and holding on tight. She can't tell when, but at some point the tears of laughter have morphed into tears of another kind. It takes two or three shaky breaths, but when she pulls out of the embrace Emma thinks she has a bit more of her life together. If only she could get rid of these pesky feelings.
"Let's go win a Quidditch cup."
Killian nods, but then frowns and takes a step back. He eyes Emma, looking her up and down, then walks around her with an odd look on his face. When he returns to her front, he again seems to be assessing something.
"What?" Emma asks incredulously. "Do I have weird grass stains on my robes or something?"
"No, nothing like that." Killian replies. "Though, I am trying to figure out how you are going to play quidditch without a broom."
"Killian, no. Not this ag-"
"Perhaps I can be of service for that? After all, if you don't have a broom, ride a Quidditch player." He turns around so his back is facing Emma, clearly intending her to get on.
Emma shakes her head, unsure if she should laugh at how ridiculous her best friend is, or cry because that was the worst pick-up line she's ever heard. "I cannot believe you just said that."
Killian frowns, turning back to face Emma. "I realize now it sounded like an awful pick-up line. But I'm being serious. Do you remember in first year, when you needed extra practice for flying lessons? But we couldn't get the broomsticks?"
"Killian, I am not getting on your back."
"Come on. For old times sake."
"Killian, no. It'll be ridiculous."
"You said you don't want to grow up."
"Yeah but I didn't want to get on your back and pretend to be flying. Not when I can just go grab my broom and fly for real."
"Just, Emma," Killian frowns. "Do I have to come over there and grab you myself? I've learnt a few charms that could allow me to fully position you on my back without even having to lift a finger."
Emma shakes her head, letting out a groan, but she pushes Killian over so she can climb onto his back. "God, you are such an ass sometimes."
"Ah, but I am your ass," Killian replies, a big smile on his face as he begins to walk them back to the castle. "Though, in this case I think I am more of a Cleansweep than a donkey."
"Oh, shut up." Emma replies, smacking Killian lightly on his shoulder. "Let's fly, broomstick. We've got a quidditch game to win tomorrow!"
It's probably an hour into the celebratory party in Gryffindor Common Room by the time Killian finds his way upstairs, his face shining with the brightest smile he's ever worn. He was going to head straight up – the Quidditch Cup held high above his and Emma's heads, but he was caught by Professor McGonagall on his way back from the change rooms. After a congratulatory hug, and a snide comment about how Slytherin can kiss their "longest streak in Hogwarts History" goodbye, she had become more somber and serious. Killian was worried something was wrong, but it turns out she just wanted to introduce him to a former student – and head Keeper for Puddlemere United – Oliver Wood.
That conversation lasted half an hour, and ended with an invitation to a scrimmage and open play session where Puddlemere, and a variety of other British minor league teams, will be recruiting for the upcoming season. It just added an even bigger piece of excitement to the buzz already flowing through his veins.
As soon as Killian steps foot into the party, he searches the room for Emma. He wants to share this with her, tell her that he may have a chance at life after all, that he won't end up some deadbeat like his father. He wants to find her, and the excited and happy part of him wants to spread the joy and just kiss her, because the only thing that could top winning the Quidditch cup AND being asked to a scrimmage is to finally, finally, let Emma know how he feels about her.
And it isn't that he hasn't tried – every time Killian seems to pluck up some courage to tell Emma how much she means to him, she is either already dating someone new, or takes his "you mean so much to me" to equal friendship. Perhaps he does need to just kiss her – truly show where his emotions lie – because after hearing Emma's fears the previous day he has a small inkling she may feel the same.
He steps through the room, smiling and nodding as he gets pats of congratulations. He has to fend off a few first years staring at him with awe in their eyes, side-stepping their seeker Ruby as she downs what looks like fire whiskey. Killian sighs, knowing he will probably be in charge of making sure that stays with the seventh years, and doesn't find its way into the goblets of anyone under the age of 16.
He scans the room once more, not sure where he could have missed Emma in the commotion, before finally seeing a glimpse of gold hair sitting on a couch near the fireplace. Killian lets out a sigh of relief, knowing these types of parties aren't Emma's favourite, before letting his happiness swell up again. He bounds to the couch, jumping over the back to land hap-hazardously next to Emma.
"Well, Swan! We did it!" He cries, laughing as his head lands on her lap, feet thankfully staying clear of the 2nd year on the other end of the couch.
Emma rolls her eyes, but Killian sees a smile there before she pushes him off of her and into an upright position. "Yeah, no help from you! You let, what, two goals in? Come on, Jones. There is no way we could've won had Ruby not caught the snitch!"
Killian eyes Emma strangely. "Swan," he says, leaning forward and grabbing her head. He moves it around, examining closely. "Did you get hit in the head by a bludger or something? We were up 180-20 when Ruby caught the snitch. We would've won anyways."
Emma fidgets, knocking Killian off of her again. She then punches him in the shoulder. "It was a joke, dummy. And, by the way, what took you so long? Without you up here, I had to help Ruby smuggle in all the fire whiskey. Which is not an easy job when your other roommate is head girl!"
"YOU helped?" Killian asks incredulously. "Emma Swan, self-proclaimed anti-party-goer, helped Ruby smuggle up fire whiskey? And is still at the party after-" he checks his watch "-fourty minutes have gone by? I would've expected you to be tucked in to bed by now."
Emma shrugs, crossing her arms and turning away from Killian. "Well, I didn't…"
Killian can't quite make out what Emma is saying, her voice getting drowned out by the shouting and cheering around them.
"Swan, can you repeat that? I couldn't quite hear."
"It's nothing," Emma replies, turning to face Killian again and plastering on a fake smile. "I just… wanted to be able to congratulate you again before bed. You know, for helping us win and all that."
"Ah, of course," Killian says.
Emma smiles, but it is a small, sad thing. "Well, with that, I should go to bed. Good job, Jones."
Killian jolts when he feels Emma reach in, her arms wrapping around him and holding on tight. He doesn't know what is bringing this on, but he basks in it, squeezing Emma and trying to convey his feelings for her into the one motion. Trying to pass on how much he loves her and cares for her and doesn't want to see her sad. Emma begins to pull back, so Killian loosens his grip. It takes her another moment, but Emma sits back on the couch and gives him another one of those smiles that don't quite reach her eyes.
"You've got some fans…" she says, motioning behind Killian. He turns to look, seeing a group of second-year students with quills and parchment, seemingly wanting his autograph. By the time Killian turns back to Emma, she is already gone. Off to bed, or upstairs, or wherever it is she hides during these events. So Killian sighs, and then takes a big breath to brace himself for a night surrounded by people who want to hang out with him, but without the one person he truly wants to spend time with.
"So?" Killian asks, fake smile and raised eyebrow in place. "Who should I make it out to?"
It takes another hour for Killian to realize he never got to tell Emma about the scrimmage.
Emma thinks it is safe to go to the common room by 4AM. Ruby has finally come back and is snoring soundly in the bed next to her, and Emma just needs maybe five minutes to go somewhere quiet and think.
She trudges slowly down the steps, her feet heavy and tired but her mind racing. She gets down towards the common room embracing the silence, but just before she reaches the last step she hears muttering and the sounds of something cleaning.
"Bloody buggering idiot you are, Jones. Couldn't have manned up tonight? You just sat there and talked, and didn't even. When on earth will you learn to just go for your gut and-"
Emma coughs, interrupting the monologue her best friend seems to be saying to himself. She takes another step down, eyes taking in the myriad of enchanted broomsticks and cleaning supplies making the common room look how it should, and not like it just had a party until 3AM.
"Emma?" Killian says, eyes wide. "How long have you been standing there?"
"Just a minute or two," Emma says. She sees him visibly relax a little, obviously glad she didn't hear everything that he has been saying for the past who-knows-how-long. Though, she is a little upset with what she did hear. Obviously he is talking about a girl, and obviously he is really worked up about it. Emma should never have come down, she should've stayed upstairs like some normal seventh year who doesn't feel like she is losing her best friend.
"Well, I'll just go back to bed."
"Emma, wait!" Killian stops her before she even has a chance to turn around, running towards her across the common room and grabbing her arm. "I… I wanted to tell you tonight. When Professor McGonagall stopped me earlier – she introduced me to Oliver Wood, of Puddlemere United. He invited me to a scrimmage this summer!"
Emma's eyes soften as she sees the genuine excitement in Killian's eyes, but her heart breaks a little more knowing how this will truly separate them this summer. Quidditch is rough, and it makes you travel, and there is no way Killian will have time for a best friend if he is off playing professionally and meeting groupies at every game. Nevertheless, she must be proud of him for all his success. So, she braces herself, smiles, and says, "Killian, that's fantastic."
But yet, Killian's response is not what she thought it would be. His smile turns into a frown, and his hand comes up to her chin.
"Emma, what's wrong?"
Emma takes a deep breath, willing the tears to stay back. "Nothing," she tries, but her voice cracks breaking the façade. "I'm fine."
"Emma Swan, how long have I known you? You are not fine, and if there is a way I could help, if there was-"
Emma cuts Killian off, and not in the normal way she would. She doesn't punch him, or kick him, or throw out some snarky comment. Oh, no. This time, she does what she has wanted to do for what feels like forever but has been terrified of for just as long. This time, she grabs Killian by the robes and pulls him in close until their lips meet. It is awkward, and a little weird, kissing her best friend, but something about it also feels right. Killian stays stiff for a moment, and Emma almost panics and pulls away, but then his hand is tangling in her hair and he is kissing her back and it is everything she has ever dreamed.
They break for air after a moment, and Killian's hand comes up to tuck an errant curl back behind Emma's ear.
"What was that?" Killian asks, his voice a little more high pitched than normal.
"I'm sorry, I didn't – " Emma starts, but Killian shakes his head.
"Don't apologize, Emma." They stay in silence for a moment, Killian's eyes soft and smiling as he stares with awe at her.
Finally, after a moment, Killian breaks the silence. "Emma, can I ask you just one question? How long have you wanted to do that for? Because I've been wanting to kiss you since partway through first year."
Emma blanches, a small laugh escaping her mouth. "Seriously?" she asks. When Killian's face doesn't change from its reverent stare, she allows her forehead to fall forward and hide in the crook of Killian's neck.
"Emma?"
"Here I was so worried that everything was going to change because we are graduating, and then I go and make everything change by kissing my best friend," Emma lets out a groan, pulling back to look into Killian's eyes. "This isn't a mistake, right?"
"Do you think it's a mistake?" Emma can sense the fear in Killian's voice, so instead of answering, she leans back up and places another kiss on his lips.
"Absolutely not," she replies, the first genuine smile of the night gracing her face. "After all, not only am I making out with the Captain of Gryffindor's winning Quidditch team, I am also making out with one of England's newest Professional Quidditch players."
"Emma," Killian groans, the backs of his ears turning pink. "I still have to try out, you know. They won't take me on a team just because I'm the Captain. I'll need more practice."
"I think we can practice quite a few things to get you ready for your quidditch try-outs," Emma replies, leaning back in to kiss Killian and feeling his arms wrap around her to pull her close. After a moment, he breaks their kiss, but continues to move his lips down the side of her neck, mumbling small nothings about how he can't wait to graduate Hogwarts to start their future together, how they both will always have a home in each other even after Hogwarts. Emma's heart swells with happiness, a small piece of her future falling into place.
She pulls him back up to her, tangling their lips and tongues together in a quidditch match of their own.
"You're magnificent," Killian says when they finally break, his mouth swollen and eyes shining.
Emma shrugs, giving Killian a small punch. "You aren't so bad yourself."
They look around, the common room finally clean and all of Killian's enchanted objects moving back to their storage spaces. She tries to stop it, but a loud yawn escapes from Emma's mouth. Killian follows suit, his own eyes beginning to droop after such a long and exciting day.
"Well, I suppose we should both retire then."
"Yeah, probably," Emma replies, her hands tangling with Killian's. Their fingers match perfectly, holding tight like there is nothing in the world keeping them apart.
"So does this make you my girlfriend?" Killian asks, eyebrow raising and tongue moving garishly into his cheek.
Emma lets out a laugh, dropping his hands and turning towards the towers. "Goodnight, Killian."
"Goodnight Swan," she hears. Emma takes a few steps up, the smile not leaving her face, before she jumps back down to find Killian still standing in the same dumbfounded spot she left him in.
"Oh, and by the way, I wanted to do that since second year. So, goodnight!" Emma places one more peck on Killian's mouth, just because she can now, before dashing upstairs to dream of a beautiful future with her best friend. Suddenly it doesn't seem as scary anymore, knowing they will face it together.
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Hope you enjoyed and Happy Valentine's!