Title: Bad Romance
Pairing: Eames/Arthur. AU.
Summary: In which Eames accidentally found out that Arthur works part time as a lead dancer in a gay pub.
Inspired by Lady Gaga's Bad Romance. Enjoy!

The italic words are the lyrics..


Oh~ Oh~ Caught in a bad romance
Oh~ Oh~ Caught in a bad romance

Rather than a bad romance, Arthur caught himself in a very bad situation. Standing on the stage with neon lights flashing down on him, he froze in his steps when his eyes met Eames. Eames, who is sitting very close to the stage, caught Arthur staring at him too. He smirked at Arthur, cleverly masking his shocked feelings with that smirk thrown at Arthur. The point man on the stage blinked for a while, before continue dancing reluctantly, mainly because a certain forger had been staring at him, boring his eyes into each and every of Arthur's movements.

"Why?" Arthur thought to himself, "Why Eames?"


Rah, rah, ah, ah, ah
Roma, roma, ma
Gaga, ooh la la
Want your bad romance

Rah, rah, ah, ah, ah
Roma, roma, ma
Gaga, ooh la la
Want your bad romance

What's worse, the DJ chose to play Bad Romance at this extremely awkward moment.

"It's for the money, Arthur." The point man reminded himself, "It's only for the money. And that stupid forger is just one of your potential customers..."

Taking a deep breath, Arthur smiled and danced to the music, moving his alluring legs and rocking his hips in every way he could to attract the other customers' attention. And of course, their money. While the other men cheered for Arthur, the point man turned his gaze back to Eames, blowing him a kiss and winked at him, while pointing at him and mouthed "Want your bad romance" to him.


I want your ugly, I want your disease
I want your everything as long as it's free
I want your love
Love, love, love, I want your love

Now the other men is looking at Eames with eyes that spelled 'jealousy' perfectly. The man sitting beside Eames nudged him and said, "Hey dude. How much are you paying for Arleen?"

"Huh?" Eames don't get what the man was implying, and he shook his head.

"You're one hell of a lucky guy." The man said and patted his back, "Arleen never made any intimate eye contact with anyone here in the bar, for as long as I can remember. Even if we pay him a lot of cash."

While the guy sighed at his own lack of luck, Eames took the time to rearrange everything in his mind. Then he got a conclusion. Arthur's identity must've been Arleen in here, and the cash... well, maybe the guys are paying Arthur to get him to notice them. He got out from his thinking, and continued to look at Arthur's dancing.


I want your drama, the touch of your hand
I want your leather studded kiss in the sand
I want your love
Love, love, love, I want your love
(Love, love, love, I want your love)

By the time Arthur had made a full, sexy turn around the pole, he had expected for Eames to stare at him with disbelief, but when he turned around, he met Eames's eyes, which are clouded with lust, and a bit of something that challenged Arthur to continue impressing him. Eames winked back at Arthur, and the point man turned bright red as he caught sight of Eames's tongue running through the forger's lips. Eames saw the blush, of course, and sees that as an open invitation for him to openly harass Arthur. Checking his wallet for some cash he had earned from several rounds of gambling earlier, Eames had formed a plan in his mind.


You know that I want you
And you know that I need you
I want it bad, bad romance

As Eames waited for Arthur to make his way back to himself, Arthur saw a man waving a stack of fresh cash towards himself. Grinning, Arthur jumped off the stage and walked towards the man, and sat on his lap, before directing his hips to thrust forward, grinding at the man's rising erection. The crowd beside them whooped as Arthur did his stuff and the man looking like he will come at any moment. Being a professional at this, Arthur stopped when he saw that the man could not hold it anymore. Smirking evilly like Eames, Arthur stuffed the cash down his pocket, before giving the man's dampened spot in between his legs a nudge.

"Be sure to clean that mess." Arthur said before leaving the man by himself to catch his breath as he strutted back to the stage.


I want your love, and I want your revenge
You and me could write a bad romance
I want your love, and all your love is revenge
You and me could write a bad romance

When Arthur returned to the stage, Eames got up and walked towards the stage, ignoring the strange glances from the other men. He made his way towards Arthur, and ignored the point man's glare, as he planted a gentle, yet demanding kiss on Arthur's lips. Putting both hands on Eames's chest, Arthur is ready to push the other man away, but Eames had learned to act faster than Arthur, so he circled his arms around Arthur's slender waist, securing him in his embrace.

"N..No, Eames! You can't just..." Arthur protested against Eames's lips, but the stronger man of the two did not had any intention to let go.

"Arthur, darling," Eames whispered into Arthur's ear, "I love you."

"Eames!" Arthur shouted, "Everyone knows you love me, but I don't love you!"


Oh, caught in a bad romance
Oh, caught in a bad romance

Rah, rah, ah, ah, ah,
Roma, roma, ma
Gaga, ooh la la
Want your bad romance

Now cheering voices rang from the crowd. Even the other dancers on the stage also stopped and watched the kissing unravel in front of them.

"See? They liked it." Eames muttered, didn't let go of Arthur and his lips for even a second. Continuing his assault, he slid his hands into the back of Arthur's thin clothing, and began to pull Arthur's shirt up, a little bit at a time. The cheering voices became louder, as Arthur's back slowly made contact with the chilling air. When Eames finally took off Arthur's clothes, the cheering in the crowd reached it's peak, and Arthur quickly hugged Eames, in order to get warmth and cover himself from the other men's eyes.

"I hate you, Eames." Arthur muttered, "I hate you."

"Yeah, and I love you too, Arthur." Eames said, secretly enjoying the feel of Arthur's bare front pressed against his shirt, and his breath tingling on his collar.


I want your horror, I want your design
'Cause you're a criminal as long as you're mine
I want your love
Love, love, love, I want your love

The next morning, Arthur had went to work as the neat Arthur. When he stepped into the base, he saw that everyone is already there, including Saito.

"Oh.. Am I late?" Arthur asked, and Cobb looked up from his paperwork.

"I'd say yes, but Eames had already explained to us that you have a part-time job." Cobb said, "So it's okay, Arthur. All of us need some rest once in a while."

"Thank you, Cobb." Arthur said, his eyes now glaring at Eames. Eames shrugged, before flashed several pieces of cash in between his fingers.

Then it came to Arthur that he had forgotten to rob Eames of his money. Arthur mentally face-palmed himself, before resisting the urge to reach out to the cash, as he sat down on his seat and began to work.

Saito caught all of it in his sight. He began to wonder what was actually happening between the forger and the point man.


I want your psycho, your vertical stick
Want you in my rear window, baby, you're sick
I want your love
Love, love, love, I want your love
(Love, love, love, I want your love)

Taking a short break from his work, Arthur got up from his seat and walked towards a more secluded place in the base to make some coffee to refresh himself. Eames got up from his seat and quietly followed Arthur from his behind. Arthur froze in his steps when he sensed that somebody is following him.

"Please, Eames." Arthur said, sighing in defeat, "Do not drive me crazy."

"But you nearly drove me crazy yesterday night!" Eames protested, "Do you know how much it took me to not tackle you down and..."

"Shut up, Eames!" Arthur shouted out, and then realized that he had been shouting at the top of his voice at the forger, because everyone in the team now directed their gaze and attention towards the both of them.

Eames was momentarily taken back by Arthur's sudden rage, but seeing the flushing Arthur fumbling around to make out the perfect apology, the shock and the bit of sadness inside him vaporized into thin air. But still, he had to toy around with Arthur a bit. It's in his nature.

Purposely showing a disappointed expression, Eames ruffled Arthur's head, making his hair loosen up from the gel he had been using for a bit, before saying, "It's okay, Arthur. I know. I will keep quiet from now on."

Walking away, Eames had missed the shocked and sad look on Arthur's face.


You know that I want you
And you know that I need you
('Cause I'm a freak, baby)
I want it bad, bad romance

At that night, Arthur returned to the club and did his thing as a dancer, but his expression was blank and his moves are quite tensed. Arthur admitted, he had been thinking about Eames for the whole day. It's embarrassing, but Arthur did have a thing for Eames. Although the forger always started some small bickering with him, and sometimes even playing pranks on him, but Arthur had always secretly enjoying those small things between them. But since that morning earlier, Eames had not talked, or rather, even glanced at Arthur for a second, and that made Arthur very confused, and depressed for no obvious reason.

Letting out one long sigh for the umpteenth time for the day, Arthur continued with his dancing below the striking neon spotlight, before he spotted another stack of cash waving his direction. Arthur got down from the stage, and dragged the man with the cash away from the crowd, towards one of the many VIP rooms specially built for dancers to deliver 'special treatments'.

"You got any more than this?" Arthur asked, grabbing the man's money over from him. While waiting for the man's reply, Arthur examined the man from head to toe. The man is taller than Arthur, and have an equally striking blonde hair, that is cropped short. The man also had a very handsome face, which threw Arthur a smile when he caught Arthur checking him out.

"Of course, babe." The man said, "That's just something to get your attention." The man then showed his wallet, which is stuffed with flashy green cash. Arthur didn't feel at all excited upon sighting those money. He felt weird, because he'd usually get happy when he saw those money. He had started to doubt himself whether if all his weirdness today is caused by a certain forger. Shaking his head, he decided that he have to do something to get his mind off Eames.

"Okay. Shall we do something interesting, then?"


I want your love, and I want your revenge
You and me, could write a bad romance
I want your love, and all your love is revenge
You and me, could write a bad romance

"Really?" The man asked, noticing the faint sadness in Arthur's expression. "Are you really okay with this?"

"Yeah, I'm fine." Arthur said, pushing the man into one of the rooms, and turned on the light, which lit dimly around the room.

"Don't you have a girlfriend or something?" The man asked again, "Won't she get mad at you?"

"I... don't have a girlfriend." Arthur said, "But, I think I have a crush on somebody."

"Hmm? Really?" The man said, and asked, "Who is it?"

"Even if I said it, chances of you knowing him is less, Mr..." Arthur then realized that he didn't asked about his customer's name, "I'm sorry, but what's your name?"

"My name is Ethan." The man introduced himself, as he watched Arthur undressed himself.

"Well then, Mr. Ethan," Arthur purred, "Tonight is going to be your best night."


Oh, caught in a bad romance
Oh, caught in a bad romance

Ethan had asked for Arthur to leave his shirt on, and Arthur had obeyed. The both of them curled underneath the thick blanket of the king-sized bed, and Ethan stared at Arthur for a long time.

"What, you're not going to do something?" Arthur asked, taking in the features of Ethan as he smirked.

"Damn. That smirk.. It is so Eames.." Arthur thought, and cursed himself for thinking of Eames when he is going to sleep with another man. Arthur closed in the distance between him and Ethan, and placed his hands on Ethan's chest, as he began kissing the base of Ethan's neck.

"You need to stop thinking of Eames, Arthur." Arthur thought, as he began to ravage Ethan's body.


Rah, rah, ah, ah, ah
Roma, roma, ma
Gaga, ooh la la
Want your bad romance

Rah, rah, ah, ah, ah
Roma, roma, ma
Gaga, ooh la la
Want your bad romance

Arthur ran his hands along Ethan's chest, carefully ran the tip of his fingers over Ethan's sensitive spots on his chest, eliciting sharp inhales from the man. He then planted light kisses from the base of Ethan's neck, trailing it down towards Ethan's body, leaving wet trails in its wake. Curling down inside the sheets, Arthur stopped when he reached Ethan's belly button. Sobbing sounds can be heard from below Ethan, and the man flipped over the sheets, to find a crying Arthur curled below him.

"Hey.." Ethan began, obviously taken back by Arthur's sudden change of actions, "Are you okay?"

"No.. I'm not okay.." Arthur managed to choke out in between hiccups, "I miss Eames.. And I cannot do this.."


Walk, walk, fashion, baby
Work it, move that thing, crazy
Walk, walk, fashion, baby
Work it, move that thing, crazy

Walk, walk, fashion, baby
Work it, move that thing, crazy
Walk, walk, passion, baby
Work it, I'm a freak, baby

A few moments later, Arthur found himself sitting in probably one of the most fluffiest beds ever, a warm blanket to sooth his trembling body, and a handsome guy sitting in front of him, looking very worried about him. Arthur knows that he should probably feel very happy right now, but his thoughts are occupied by Eames. Eames, which is capable of turning his world upside down.

"You okay, babe?" Ethan asked, patting Arthur's back with concern.

"I'm okay.. I'm okay.." Arthur said, convincing not just himself, but Ethan as well, "And please don't call me babe. It reminds me of this bastard I know."

"What did he done to you?" Ethan asked, his face full of nothing but concern.

"He did nothing..." Arthur said, holding back another hiccup, "I am the one who did something to him.."

"Hmm? Why is it?" Ethan asked. "And is he your crush, as well?"

"Because I shouted at him today.." Arthur said, "I didn't expect my voice to be that loud and fierce.. And yes, Ethan, he is my crush."

"Maybe you should apologize to him tomorrow.." Ethan said, "Or the next time the both of you met.. Did he happen to work at the same place as you?"

"Yes... So things are quite awkward after I had shouted at him.." Arthur admitted, and tears began to prick at the back of his eyes. "But it's okay. I will go and confront him tomorrow."

"Don't cry, Arleen." Ethan said, in an attempt to comfort Arthur, "And I know that this is random, but your real name isn't Arleen, isn't it?"

"Yeah.." Arthur said, "My name is Arthur."


I want your love, and I want your revenge
I want your love, I don't wanna be friends
J'ai ton amour, et je veux ton revenge
J'ai ton amour, I don't wanna be friends

No, I don't wanna be friends
(Oh, caught in a bad romance)
I don't wanna be friends

Want your bad romance
(Oh, caught in a bad romance)
Want your bad romance

"Hmm.. Arthur.." Ethan said, rolling Arthur's name on the tip of his tongue, "What a nice name for a guy."

"Thank you.." Arthur felt himself blushing at Ethan's compliment.

"Now, now.. Don't get all girly in front of me, okay, Arthur?" Ethan said, and cupped Arthur's cheeks in his palm, and rubbed his thumb over Arthur's wet cheeks. "Although your blushing face is quite cute to me.."

"Thanks, Ethan." Arthur said and smiled sweetly. Now it's Ethan's turn to blush.

"Now you're blushing, E~than." Arthur whined and pinched Ethan's cheeks and smiled, which made Ethan chuckled out.

"You are the best man I've seen in my life, Arthur." Ethan said in between chuckles, "If only you did not have a crush on somebody else, I would have claimed you mine."

"Well should I take that as a compliment?" Arthur asked, and grinned broadly.

"You know, I've never seen you laugh so much before, Arthur."

"Really..?" Arthur asked, and something ticked in the back of his mind. He had never seen Ethan before, so why would he know that he rarely smiled during the day? Even when he's dancing, Arthur had also limited his laughs to a minimum rate.

In a split second, Ethan flipped the sheets over Arthur's face, and when Arthur pulled the blanket down his face, Eames was sitting there, replacing Ethan in it's wake. Arthur jolted back and shifted himself away from Eames.

"Damn it. I should have known it." Arthur cursed loudly, "The smirk, the prefix you used when you call me, and even your freaking name starts with an 'E'! Why didn't I noticed that?" Arthur then covered his face with the blanket.

"Now, darling.." Eames began, and tugged at the blanket that is covering Arthur's face, "Take the blanket off your face, and we'll talk about this."

"Yeah. We are so going to talk about this." Arthur grunted, and lowered his blanket, meeting his eyes with Eames's playful ones.


I want your love, and I want your revenge
You and me, could write a bad romance
I want your love, and all your love is revenge
You and me, could write a bad romance

Want your bad romance
(Oh, caught in a bad romance)
Want your bad romance
Want your bad romance
(Oh, caught in a bad romance)

"Why did you do this to me?" Arthur asked, "Why are you ignoring me during the day, and impersonate as Ethan here?"

"It's because I want to get my revenge." Eames said, grinning, "A revenge for shouting at me."

"You're childish." Arthur said blankly.

"But you liked it that way, isn't it?" Eames asked, and grazed his finger across Arthur's chin. Arthur made no attempt to snap it away.

"You know, I could hate you because of this." Arthur said. Eames nodded.

"And you will still fall in love with me after that." Eames said, "I saw it. How you were so depressed when I wasn't there to bicker with you."

"You.. saw it?" Arthur asked.

"Of course!" Eames exclaimed, "A forger must have a very sharp sense of observation, isn't it?"

"I guess so.." Arthur muttered, and continued, "But still! You can't do this to me! You can't go around and hurting somebody else, and then wanting to sleep with that person in less than 24 hours!"

"That's my style, darling." Eames said, "My style."

"Whatever, Eames."

"So... Am I still allowed to ask you to continue what you did earlier?" Eames asked.

Arthur stared at Eames for a few seconds before nodding, knowing that he had no escape when it comes to Eames. He would forced him to do it even if Arthur rejected him.


Rah, rah, ah, ah, ah
Roma, roma, ma
Gaga, ooh la la
Want your bad romance

The next day, Arthur and Eames took a day off. The team need not them to explain to know what's going on.. Because Saito had bought the gay club Arthur was going to and watched one of the surveillance cameras that are installed in the VIP room the both of them are in the night before.

"Eames, are you sure that we don't need to tell Cobb the reason we're absent to work today?"

"Yeah.. I had Saito took care of it already." Eames said and winked at Arthur, who fall asleep almost immediately after listened to Eames's answer.


End~

So what do you guys think?

And yes, I need some advice.. Should this fic be rated as T or M? I can't decide...

Reviews are much loved and appreciated!

~VelonicaSushi