I'm running away from my love. My life, I thought to myself as I ran through the forest. Bella's' face swam in front of my eyes, her warm, deep brown eyes looking at me, believing the lie I said to her. My silent heart, though it had not beaten in over a century, grew heavy. My pace slowed as my eyes stung strangely like they wanted to tear but couldn't, and sobs racked my body. I fell to the ground under the shade of an oak tree. The squirrels that were nearby scuttled away at my approach. I bowed my head and let the misery overwhelm me.
In the direction of where Bella was, I heard the howl of a wolf. I started and leapt up. What if she strays into the path of the animal? With her luck it is a possibility. I thought. I took a step forward. It will be as if I'd never existed. My vow to Bella floated back to mind. I stopped, sighed and turned away from the memories.
I ran north. The others were at Tanya's place in Denali. Sadness and misery made me run slightly slower but that did not matter. As I drew closer, someone's thoughts entered my mind
Edward. Edward are you ok? No of course he isn't silly. I miss Bella already.
I sighed. Alice ran lightly up to me, her eyes for once were not bright with excitement, but sad and solemn, the corners of her mouth turned down. I nodded slightly to her and walked slowly ahead.
"You can't leave without telling Esme. You remember what happened last time." Alice murmured quietly, her voice mingling with the sounds of the forest. I sighed as I realised that if I did that to Esme again I would feel horrible.
"Yes I suppose I should tell her." Even to me my voice sounded dead. Hollow. I looked at the ground. My eyes saw everything and yet saw nothing except Bella's face. Alice was trying to see where I will be going but could see nothing. I didn't even know where I could go. Maybe I could go to South America. The Amazon and go see Zafrina, Senna, and Kachiri.
"You have to come visit though. Promise?" Alice whispered as she stepped in front of my path, forcing me to look into her eyes. Would I be able to be around my family though? I wondered to myself as I hesitated in my answer. I wasn't sure. Alice's gaze pleaded with me to say yes but I wasn't sure if I could say that. I breathed in deep, my lungs seeming shallow, my heart feeling as if it had disappeared.
"We shall see."
The minutes melted into hours, which turned into days, which blended into weeks and I still didn't move. The fiery burn in my throat felt weak; almost cold without the constant temptation in my wake.