This will have two or three chapters! Hope you guys enjoy!

Clarke thinks that universe is playing one big joke on her. Well, multiple, actually. One after another.

It starts in spring and after that, everything goes wrong.

Early March, her father goes to jail, and her mother was the one who turned him in. And as much as Clarke likes to think she is a law-abiding citizen, there's nothing she wouldn't do for her dad. Even cover for him if he was a murderer. She doesn't stop herself from calling her mother a traitor, accusing her of thinking only of herself and ruining their family, and then she slams the front door and decides she is not coming home for spring break. Thankfully, she has her sorority house always open for her.

She had been preparing to tell her mother that she doesn't want to do medicine, that she actually wants to be a teacher. She knows she has the potential to be a doctor, but she understands she won't be able to detach herself from patients. Her compassion is ridiculous - just knowing that someone is in pain makes her heart ache and she feels dizzy, and she simply can't get over it.

So she's decided she wants to do something that is meaningful too, but not as emotionally demanding. She wants to be an elementary school teacher. She's great with kids and she had considered this even when she herself was a kid. For her, it's settled.

Clarke had been preparing to break the news to her mom, but now, having cut off all communication with her, she has no one to break them to. No one will tell her that she's making a huge mistake that she will inevitably regret. And, with her dad being in prison, there is no one to stand up to her in an argument. A family argument.

As much as she hates to admit it, she misses her family. As dysfunctional as it's always been. And she also misses her mother.

There's no one to talk to, not like that. No one to really argue with. She has friends, of course. There's her sorority sister Octavia, with Jasper and Monty being part of the package (O had known them since virtually forever), and there's Raven who had transferred a month ago to restore the complicated relationship that she had with her long-time mysterious boyfriend that no one's gotten to meet yet. (Not that she's been thinking about that a lot lately, given the circumstances.) She's known Raven for a week, but could literally swear they're soulmates. No one understands her like she does.

Still, she can't talk to Wells that often anymore: he's preoccupied with constant search of internships (no one seems to take those as seriously as Wells does).

She misses her family so much it makes her feel physically sick. So, Octavia suggests they get drunk. And Clarke is always up for that.

It's only been half an hour since they've arrived at the bar, but Clarke is already tipsy. Or maybe worse than that, but that's what she tells herself.

"Seriously, what is my life now?" she mumbles, tired and drunk, resting her chin on her palm. "I'm a senior, about to graduate, I have no loving relationship, no family left—"

"You have us," Octavia says, squeezing her other hand, and Monty and Jasper nod in agreement. "Always remember that."

"I know that, and I love you guys, but sometimes…"

"That's not enough?" Octavia finishes.

"No, sometimes it's not. Please don't hate me."

Jasper snorts. "We wouldn't hate you. I completely understand you, actually. That's how I felt when Maya left me. That I needed someone who really got how I felt in that situation to talk to me, and even friends' support wasn't enough for me."

Clarke remembers. It was their sophomore year, and Maya, being older, had to move across the continent to pursue a career of her dreams after graduation. She was the one who suggested she and Jasper break up. Jasper agreed: he didn't want to hold her back and stop her from making her dream come true. He said he was willing to let her go, if that was what she wanted. So she left, and Jasper spent around three months drinking his life away, until his parents (quite cleverly summoned by Octavia) showed up and basically forced him to go through therapy. He is better now, but when someone mentions Maya he always gets that look in his eyes that never used to leave him right after their breakup. That's why his words surprise Clarke, and warm feeling of affection grows somewhere deep in her chest.

Her friends love her very much, and she should be grateful she has them.

"Thank you guys," Clarke says, throwing her arms around Octavia and Jasper's shoulders (since she is sitting between them) and hugging them both. "I love you. I just wish Raven was here too."

"Well, she's a little busy working on her relationship," O retorts, parodying Raven's voice for emphasis. Clarke chuckles. Raven and Octavia aren't on good terms, and that's something she can't understand, but hasn't given up trying to fix yet. Octavia's phone buzzes, and she picks it up to read the text she received. "Speaking of relationships. Would you hate me forever-"

"If Lincoln needs you, you can go," Clarke says with a smile. Those two are just too cute and she can't stay in bad mood for too long when the conversation brushes upon the topic of their relationship. She has no idea how O managed to find a boyfriend who has the looks of a model and a benevolent, caring personality. Oh, and who also absolutely worships the ground Octavia walks on.

"You're an angel, and I'm a shitty friend and totally owe you," Octavia states, sliding closer to plant a lipgloss-y kiss on Clarke's cheek. "Bye."

Clarke looks at Monty and Jasper, who seem very tired. "Do you want to go?" She asks so that they don't have to do it.

They nod and start to head off, but when they're about to take their bus, Clarke remembers she forgot her purse on the table. Her phone, her money, her whole life is in that purse.

She tells the guys to leave without her, assuring them she's not really drunk and she'll just call a taxi right after she gets her purse, and jumps off the bus.

It leaves without her.

She finds her purse, and on her way out she bumps into a cute guy, who seems to be struggling to stay sober that Thursday evening too. He spills his beer all over her shirt and offers to let him borrow one of his since he doesn't live far. He says his name is Finn and he's the first nightstand Clarke has in her life.

Clarke wakes up around five in the morning and sees Finn's phone that he left on the nightstand by his bed. She feels terrible at first, but when she sees notifications of texts from Raven Reyes, her blood runs cold.

She screwed her friend's on and off boyfriend. She will burn in hell for this.

Terrified and feeling like shit, Clarke gathers her stuff and goes home, trying not to wake Octavia as she crawls into bed and quietly cries into the pillow.

Clarke spends the next two weeks trying to come up with a way to tell Raven about what happened. But she can't find a right moment.

By the time she convinces herself that there simply isn't a right moment to tell your friend that you're a cunning bitch who slept with her boyfriend, Raven calls her and cries over the phone. She say her boyfriend has been in a car accident, and that he's dead. Clarke tells herself that she isn't relieved by the news. After all, she might be a bitch, but she's not that big of a bitch. She consoles her friend in any possible ways.

And two weeks after that, Clarke finds out she's pregnant.

Mid-May, they all graduate from college, and it's been a week since Clarke found out she is pregnant. At a celebration party at one of the frat houses, Clarke can't bring herself to feel happy. Once again, her future is one big blur that terrifies her. She has no job, no partner to support her, and no family (apart from her friends). She still doesn't know how to tell her parents that their daughter, ten minutes out of college, has managed to get pregnant. She is not in mood for partying, and honestly, if Octavia hadn't insisted, she would not have even gone. Octavia was also the one who forced her to wear a low-cut top, since she didn't want to get too dressed up.

It appears Octavia invited her brother, Bellamy, to this party, even though he's a long time graduate. She notices him and gives him a polite smile, which he probably takes as a sign that she wouldn't mind talking. So he comes up to talk, and Clarke regrets smiling at him immediately. Not that she hates or dislikes Bellamy, she just really doesn't like him. He's way too clever for his own good, too hot, and opinionated. Basically, everything she would've liked about a guy, had there been any chance that he'd actually pay any attention to her and see past the fact that she was his baby sister's best friend. But there's no chance because why would he? She's been Octavia's friend for good four years now, and that sort of ensured her screwing up in front of him on multiple occasions. Like when Clarke got so drunk she couldn't walk one time her freshman year, and Octavia got scared and called Bellamy, who had to almost carry her into her dorm room. Or that time when Clarke accidentally ripped her dress and, having called Octavia for help, had to hide in the bathroom for about an hour before Bellamy barged in (despite it being a female bathroom) and said that Octavia couldn't come so she had asked him to drop off a substitute dress for Clarke. Basically, every incident that is cringe-worthy and that haunts Clarke every time she can't fall asleep at night Bellamy had been present for. He even held her hair as she puked into the toilet after having had too many tequilas.

Considering all that, one might have suggested that Bellamy had a thing for her or something at least vaguely similar, but there is nothing. He has this weird attachment to her, but it's like he is her older brother. Like she is just another baby sister for him that Octavia has always been. And she knows it's hard but possible to get out of friend zone, but it's literally impossible to leave sister zone. She doesn't stand a chance and that annoys her to no end.

That's why every time she sees Bellamy she makes a point of rolling her eyes and huffing at everything he says. She does the same now, and at the thought that her zero chances of ever getting him to like her have become absolutely negative, since she is now pregnant with another guy's baby, her heart clenches. And no one knows about it. She knows it's only been a week since she found out, and she hasn't even seen a doctor, but she feels like the weight of the secret is about to crush her and she honestly just wants to tell someone. But it can't be Bellamy. It simply can't.

"How are you, Princess?" Bellamy asks, all charming smiles and cute freckles, and Clarke feels like her heart is about to explode in her chest. But not in a good way. Not good at all.

"I'm good," she pushes out of herself, and holding the cup with orange juice in it. If she didn't have a drink in her hand, people would start asking question, or worse, forcing her to drink something, so she thought she would pretend she was doing it already.

"Not enjoying the party?"

Clarke sees Octavia watching them from across the room. She's been talking to Lincoln, but now she got distracted, and she watches Clarke's face with a concerned frown, like she's about to figure something out. Clarke genuinely hopes she doesn't. She opens her mouth to respond, but then Scream & Shout by Will I Am starts to play, and the song brings memories of her freshman year, when the song was extremely popular. She remembers how easy everything was back then; her parents were happy together, her father wasn't in prison, and her mother wasn't partly responsible for it. She wasn't pregnant. She had her whole life and a bright future ahead of her.

She never answers Bellamy's question because there's suddenly this empty feeling in her stomach and tears start to run down her face, and soon she's basically sobbing. She doesn't see Octavia make her way towards her, only feels her hug in a few moments, and "What have you done?" O barks at Bellamy, as if it's his fault Clarke is crying.

"Nothing!" he said, eyes open wide and confusion written all over his face. Octavia gives him a judgmental look, clearly not believing, so he raises his hands, "I swear". Clarke notices this, but keeps sobbing into O's shoulder, until her friend gently pulls her into the corridor, saying that she should get some fresh air.

It's quiet outside, and Clarke can actually hear herself think, but she still can't stop crying, even though she understands that it's actually ridiculous. Octavia shouldn't have to pick up the pieces of her when it's clearly her own fault. She's just so tired. She doesn't know how to hold it inside anymore, so she continues crying, with Octavia hugging her and caressing her back and murmuring that it's all fine, that she'll be fine.

A few minutes later, when it feels like she's physically run out of tears, Clarke untangles herself out of Octavia's embrace and tries to wipe tears off her face. Unsuccessfully.

"Whatever Bell said or did," Octavia says, looking in Clarke's eyes with all seriousness, "I'll crush his balls. And then he'll come and apologise."

Clarke sighs, smiling lightly in spite of herself. "Bellamy didn't do anything, O. I wasn't crying because of him.

"Then what happened? You haven't been yourself for the last week, but I thought you'd tell me when you were ready."

Clarke looks at her with surprise, but Octavia gives her a pointed look. "You're not that good of an actress, Clarke. What happened?"

She doesn't know whether she should tell. Having anyone know seems like the scariest thing in the world right now. But she can't do this alone anymore. She's tired. Besides, if she were to tell someone, the first person would be Octavia. They've been there for each other since forever.

Clarke takes a deep breath. "I'm pregnant."

There's a pause. The silence is so heavy, with Octavia looking at Clarke without blinking, her mouth open in surprise, that Clarke starts to feel anxious. And it's not good.

"Um," Octavia finally says, "Uh- For how long?"

"Around six weeks. I'm not sure though. I haven't been to a doctor."

"And what? Are you going to keep it?"

"I don't know for sure yet, but I don't think abortion is an option for me."

Octavia sighs and covers her eyes with her hands. Clarke feels like she wants to cry again. "I know it seems bad, but it's actually even worse."

Octavia opens her eyes. "Why?"

"The father of the baby-" she pauses, scared of her friend's reaction. "He's Finn Collins"

"Finn Collins? As in Raven's boyfriend Finn Collins, who died a week ago?"

Clarke nods in response.

"Shit," O says. "Shit. Does Raven know?" Clarke shakes her head, tears brimming in her eyes again. "Does anyone know?" She shakes her head again. "How did that happen at all?"

Clarke tries to pull herself together to explain herself. "I met him at a bar, I was drunk, had no idea who he was. He didn't tell me he wasn't single. I found out in the morning and ran away. I wanted to tell Raven, I really did, but then-"

"He died.

"Yes," Clarke sobs. "And now my life is going down the drain, and I have no idea what to do."

Octavia's gaze softens, and she hugs Clarke again, rubbing her back soothingly. "It's going to be fine. We'll figure something out, I promise. Everything will be good."

Clarke just hopes she can believe that one day.

Octavia offers they go home, but Clarke honestly doesn't want to. This party might not be the best idea right now, but at least it's distraction. They return to the room they were in before, but this time Octavia doesn't leave Clarke's side for a while. It feels strange, like her friend is being protective of her now that she knows she's pregnant. Even more protective than she was before. That makes Clarke smile, but the heavy feeling in her stomach hasn't disappeared yet.

Octavia makes a point of not apologising to Bellamy for her outburst earlier, and Bellamy gives Clarke a hug immediately after he sees her. Clarke freezes in surprise, but then relaxes and returns the hug. It's nice. He feels soft and strong at the same time, and also warm and gentle. She likes being hugged by him. They part, and Clarke notices Octavia looking at them with a weirdly smug expression.

Bellamy smiles at Clarke. "Are you okay?"

Octavia responds for her, "Don't worry, she's just-" Clarke gives her a panicked look, silently begging not to tell, "-having a bad day. Graduating from college is a big change."

Clarke smiles back at Bellamy. "Yeah. I miss how things were before," and it's true. Just not all of the information.

"Hey Bell, could you stay with Clarke while I go look for Lincoln?" O says.

"I don't need a-"

"Sure," Bellamy interrupts Clarke, and his sister heads off to find her boyfriend.

They talk, and it's nice. Snapping at each other and arguing seems to be their specialty, but now they're civil. It seems like Bellamy doesn't want to be hard on Clarke, and despite her pride that hates when others feel sorry for her, she feels grateful. Octavia doesn't come back in the next twenty minutes, and Clarke really needs the bathroom. At least that's what she tells Bellamy, when in reality, she feels really sick, and when Bellamy sees something is wrong and follows her into the bathroom, she realises this is something she isn't prepared for. Everyone else (from what she's heard) throws up in the mornings, whereas with her it's progressively getting worse. If she's going to start throwing up randomly throughout the day, it's going to be hard to hide it from people. Not that it's something that can be hidden forever anyway.

She knows that her position isn't necessarily critical, that things could've been a lot worse. Like when girls get pregnant in high school and can't even go to college because of that. She's graduated, she will be able to find a job- eventually. She's not a kid anymore. But she's still scared, and the fear gets stronger as she keeps throwing up into the toilet, with Bellamy holding her hair for her. If she wasn't about to cry (again), she would've made a joke about déjà vu.

When she's done, she gets up, tears in her eyes, and rinses her mouth and face with lukewarm water. She stands there, her hands on the sink, not knowing how to face Bellamy. If he hasn't guessed it by now, he probably will soon. And now, Clarke suddenly feels ashamed. She doesn't know what he'll think of her when he realises she's pregnant with her friend's boyfriend's child.

"Something's wrong with you, right?" he asks, quiet, sensing that she's not too willing to discuss this with him. Discuss it with anyone, actually. Clarke just prays he doesn't guess. One single day can't be that eventful, right? If that's the right word.

Clarke straightens up and, swallowing her tears, calms her face. She then turns to Bellamy, trying to look serene and- well, normal. Things being normal is what she wants right now. More than anything. "I'm fine. Must have had too much to drink."

Bellamy frowns. "You haven't had any alcohol tonight. I saw it, you only had one cup in your hand, and I'm pretty sure it was orange juice."

Oh my God, why is he such a stalker, Clarke thinks to herself. But then feels guilty since Bellamy notices those things only because he actually cares. She should appreciate that. And she does. She loves him for it; has for a long time. He's a kind and caring person, who takes his responsibilities seriously, and that's one of the reasons why she fell for him in the first place. And he's looking at her with a gentle expression, but there's also worry in his eyes, so Clarke sighs.

"Then it must be stress or something."

He obviously doesn't buy it, but Clarke doesn't know what else to do. She goes to open the door to leave the bathroom, brushing his shoulder as she walks past, but he grabs her hand right before she is about to leave.

"Seriously, Clarke, what's happening?"

Suddenly, everything inside her explodes. "I'm pregnant, okay?" she says, probably louder than she should. Bellamy freezes, and there's a weird expression on his face, but Clarke doesn't really get to concentrate on that because at that moment, Octavia shows up outside the open door, definitely having heard Clarke's last words. "Happy?" Clarke asks Bellamy, her voice harsh and full of sarcasm, then yanks her hand out of his grip and storms past Octavia, heading for the door.

Octavia follows her, of course, shouting "Clarke, wait!" as she tries to catch up with her.

Still a new girl here, leave some love in the comments please!

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