Friday, 7/8/11

I roll up my window, and look outside. Vast fields of corn, spread as far as the eye can see; reds, oranges, and yellow hues paint the sky, and the only sound that could be heard was the soft roaring of the car's engine. Overall, it was peaceful, quiet, and whenever we did pass by someone on the dirt road, they'd politely wave at me. I don't wave back. I pull my head back in, and cross my arms over my chest.

Yasoinaba, population: 1096. This was the place I had been condemned to, the hell I'd have to endure for god knows how long... Until I can win back my father's love, I guess. I turn the knob on the radio, and search through songs, anything to drown the poisonous thoughts running through my mind. My grandmother, Hanari, has both hands on the steering wheel, and whenever I meet her gaze, she shoots me a comforting smile. I force one back.

"It won't be so bad, dear," She starts, but I'm not really paying attention. I'm staring down at the balled-up fists in my lap, listening to the song that was playing, which now was slowly fading to it's end. "You'll be helping me out on the farm from time to time, but for the most part, you'll be attending the high school nearby."

My name's Erin Suzuki—Rin for short—and had been living in the city for most of my life. I had gotten so used to the blaring city lights, crowded streets, and exhaust fume smells that I feel it's permeated into my skin. I can still breathe it all in when I inhale. I'm still thinking, hoping that this is some sort of nightmare, and I'll wake up, but everytime I pinch myself, I'm still surrounded by a lush country side.

It takes us about 10 more minutes to roll up the truck at the Floodplains. I slip my backpack back on, and shut the door behind me. The house is much smaller than the one I grew up in, back in Iwatodai—it was obviously suited for one person. My grandmother was always independent, and enjoyed doing things that weren't considered feminine. She had been married at one point, but it didn't last; said it wasn't for her—and feels even smaller when I walk in. She gives me a quick tour of the house. There's an upstairs, with two bedrooms, one bath. Downstairs there's a small bar area, the kitchen, a dining room, and a living room.

The bedroom upstairs was going to be mine for the next year, and when I asked her where she slept, she only laughed, and gave me an eye-crinkling smile, that reminds me of just how old she really was. Apparently, she slept on the couch... Better for her back, she said.

I walk upstairs, and quietly begin to unpack my things. I had never been very materialistic, and for the most part, I had only packed the necessities. Once that's done, I'm sitting on the edge of the freshly made-up bed, grey eyes drawn back out the window. I can feel tears running down my cheek, but I brush them off, and force everything down.

I have one sister, a twin sister named Airi. Me, and anyone who had eyes could tell that she was the perfect daughter, the better daughter. You could talk to her for 5 minutes, and see her brilliance. Talking to me for 5 minutes would just run you in circles. I'm not as confident as she is, nor am I as intelligent, and that had become apparent at a very early age, maybe when I was 6. I can't really remember much; subconsciously, I think I surpressed that part of my memory, my childhood. When I think back, all I can see are smudged faces, too blurred to make out, and angry voices.

Worthless, pathetic... These words are not new to me. My father's probably said more to me, worst, but as of right now, I can't remember it. I make one mistake, and I'm thrown out, out in the middle of nowhere, in a town so small that's it not even on most maps. Of course I'm grateful that my grandmother took me in... But...

It still hurts.

Monday, 7/11/11

It's my first day of school, and I'm fidgeting uncomfortably in the sleek metal chair in the office, constantly smoothing out my skirt because it's way too small, and even wearing the black pantyhose underneath still leaves me feeling naked. A woman—my homeroom teacher, most likely—is shifting through my file, which wasn't exactly clean (I catch the subtle, disapproving stare she's giving me). I had a pretty bad reputation, lackluster grades, and had been in detention a few too many times. Her perfume's way too strong, and I feel like I'm suffocating in the already small room. She's wearing a light pink v-neck, that emphasizes her already ample chest, and I'm not sure where to look at when she speaks to me.

"Erin Suzuki, yes?" I nod. "I'm Noriko Kashiwagi, and I'll be your homeroom teacher this year." She speaks in a slow, sultry voice, and I sink further into my seat. My stomach's tying itself into knots.

"I-I see... Um, where is that, exactly?"

"It's classroom 2-2. I'm on my way there now, so I'll go with you~" I flash her a small smile, and follow her out of the office, upstairs, and into the classroom. When we walk in, all the students shuffle, and take their seats, and a certain boy with light brown hair, and headphones around his neck catches my eye. I blush slightly, and stand meekly beside Ms. Kashiwagi.

After a brief introduction, I'm ironically placed beside the boy I noticed, and he gives me the prettiest smile I've ever seen. "Hey there~! I'm Yosuke Hanamura. Nice to meet ya."

I smile, and shake the extended hand he's thrusted towards me. His hand is warm in mine, and I inwardly whine when he withdraws it, "It's nice to meet you too, Yosuke-kun!"

It's been a few weeks since that day. And I've changed; I'm not as weak, and fragile, but I'm still tripping over things that aren't there, and I still get lost trying to find my class. Yosuke-kun's been a real sweetheart, has helped me out so much since I've gotten here, and I wish there was some way I could return his kindness... But I can't think of anything.

I'm part-timing at the local supermarkert in town, and we've grown even closer since his dad's the store manager. I'm aware of the rumors of us dating circulating in school ("Two losers in love!"), but I pay no mind to them. We were friends, best friends even, and although the thought of dating him sounded incredible, I knew he wasn't ready to jump headfirst into a relationship.

So I'll do what I do best, and wait for him.

Saturday, 8/27/11

"Riiiin-chaaaaan?! Helllllllo?!" A young girl with bouncy, redish-brown pigtails elbows my side, and my thoughts are derailed, and abandoned. "Geez, did you fall asleep?"

Did I? I rub my head, but I can't remember what I had been thinking about... I smile sheepishly at the people around the table, and apologize.

There are 7 of us, not including me, and we make up a group called, "The Investigation Team." Our goal is to solve the recent murder cases in town, using the power known as Persona, our inner selves.

Yu-kun is our leader. He has silver, bowl-cut hair with bangs swept to the side, and matching eyes. He's usually quiet, but when he does speak, it always clears up any doubt that any of us might have had. He's really mature for his age, and a lot of people look up to him.

Yosuke-kun's sort of his "right-hand man." His hair is a light brown, almost orange color, and he has dark brown eyes. Typically, he's the optimistic one, always there to cheer us up, and lighten up the mood, but he can be serious when he wants to be.

Chie-chan... Truthfully, I didn't pay much attention to her. It's not that I don't get along with her, it's just that we don't have much in common, so whenever we do speak, it feels forced. Her hair is a light brown color, and is cut short. Her eyes are brown as well, and it's rare to not find her smiling.

Yuki-chan's her best friend. We've had a few conversations before, and I consider her more than acquaintance, but less than a friend (if that makes sense). Her hair is an ebony-color, and falls down her back in waves; she keeps it in place with a red headband, and she has dark colored eyes.

Ted-kun's something differently entirely. A bear trying to find out who he is, but has recently... Somehow... Created a human form. In that form, he has brilliant, big blue eyes, and platinum blonde hair. He constantly tries flirting with me and the other girls, but has a soft spot... Somewhere.

Kanji-kun... I didn't get along with him. I think he's just a punk; he sees me as this weak little girl that can't defend herself. I don't find it hard to socialize with the others, but for some reason, I just can't find myself connecting to him. He has slicked back blonde hair, and dark grey eyes.

Finally, there's Rise-chan. A former idol, and also a good friend of mine. She teases us a lot, but she actually has her own share of insecurities, just like everyone else. The ends of her hair are curly, and she ties it back in a pig-tail fashion. She has round brown colored eyes.

And among them all, I feel like I'm the least impressive. I don't have too many positive traits, and I can't say that I can sew together a stuffed animal, sing for thousands, or even bend in ways not humanly possible. I'm just Rin; brown, curly hair, and grey eyes.

We were sitting at the foodcourt of Junes, our base of operations, under a large umbrella, throwing ideas at each other. Someone had recently showed up on the Midnight Channel—the sort of "show" we used to track who the next potential murder victim would be—and we were trying to figure out who it was.

"Any ideas, guys?" Chie-chan looked between the group of us, and I hummed lightly in thought. It was a boy, that much was for sure... For some reason, I felt like I had known him from somewhere...