Chapter 1 – Wake me up when September ends.

It seemed to Harry that since the war ended, all there was, was time.

During the war, which had stolen all that Harry hold dear, all Harry wanted was more time. Time to be a normal teenager. Time kissing Ginny. Time to do the mundane things which counted so much: drinking butterbeer in the winter in Hogsmeade with Ron and Hermione, schoolboy banter with Ron, even being chastised by Hermione over homework.

But now, there was just too much of it. Too much time. Suddenly schoolboy banter with Ron was sometimes strained, and always never enough. Homework had always felt pointless, but suddenly it felt meaningless too. Butterbeer was no longer strong enough.

Suddenly he was a child in the shape of a man, and Harry stared at himself in the mirror, thinking that there was too much time on his hands. But then he also simultaneously thought- where had the time gone?

Harry sat on the Hogwarts Express, Hermione next to him, Ron opposite. Ginny and him had broken up that summer. Or not broken up rather, but just failed to get back together.

Harry had stumbled through an explanation to Ginny as to why he didn't want to get back together. 'I need to recover from everything'

'I just don't feel ready for a relationship right now..'

'I need to figure myself out..'

Harry supposed that those excuses were somewhat true, but the words felt like they came from a stranger's mouth as he spoke them. If Harry was true to himself- he just wasn't… feeling it anymore. Ginny was a symbol of simple happiness . She had had a wicked sense of humour and fun that enticed 16 year old him. Now, Ginny could still make him laugh when he wanted to, but he had no idea how they had once talked about themselves being soulmates. Harry didn't understand his soul, never mind someone else's.

Ginny had bit her lip and avoided her eyes, trying to hide her upset.

'Why can't we just help each other get through this? I understand we're both-broken. But can't we.. can't we help mend each other?'

Harry had replied by just saying that he was sorry, but he just couldn't do it. But he had wanted to scream that he couldn't mend her. He couldn't mend himself. 'Yes', he thought to himself, I can save someone from death, but I can't save their life.

He felt useless. Ron dealt with things by occasionally running off when he remembered that Fred was dead. Hermione was teary eyed more often than not. But they were also…good. And in love. Ron and Hermione had just as many laughs as tears. They talked to each other. And they tried to talk to him. Ron was always cracking jokes these days. Hermione seemed to ask if he was okay at least 4.5 times a day. But he was useless. They had been through just as much as him, and he repaid their kindness with head nods and silence. He wasn't a good friend anymore. He was guilty, but no feeling could overpower the emptiness that filled him. He felt like he had nothing left to give.

Ginny was in another carriage, avoiding him like she had all summer. Harry hated it when she cried, he really did. But it was just one more thing he couldn't fix.

Hermione and Ron paused from their card game which Harry had declined to play. 'Are you alright, Harry?', she asked gently, with a tentative smile.

'Yeah! I'm fine. I'm just trying to get some beauty sleep before I get there so I look good for all my fans', he grinned widely at them as they laughed. He rested his head on the window, losing himself in the rolling hills of Scotland, and welcomed sleep. The hills were the same hills he'd passed every year since he was 11. But everything had changed.