Disclaimers: The characters in this story are copyrighted by Warner Brothers and Shoot The Moon Productions. The song referenced (lyrics included at the end) is the property of Andy Grammer. I make no money from these characters; I simply like to share their world for a short time.
A/N Thanks to all who took the time to review my previous story. Another song has now taken up residence in my head, but this time it's pretty much all Lee. Hope you enjoy! (Constructive reviews are always welcome.) A special thanks to Bruce Boxleitner and Kate Jackson—as well as the rest of the cast—for portraying these characters so wonderfully.
Lee was on his sixth glass of scotch. Granted, they were watered down; he had made that arrangement with Ned when he entered the place over four hours ago. But he hadn't had time to grab anything to eat for lunch or dinner. On an empty stomach, even the watered-down versions were getting to him. He'd definitely have to call a cab later. The 'Vette would be safe enough in the parking garage next door until tomorrow.
Just where in the hell was his contact? Augie had called him just as he was getting ready to leave the Q Bureau for the day. He had told Lee that it was urgent. A man would approach him at Nedlindger's this evening with vital information regarding the sale of top secret plans for a new radar system to the Russians. His contact would come up to him at the bar and say "Have you seen the new Harrison Ford film?" Lee's response was to be "No, I prefer to read the book."
After a quick call to his wife to explain why he would be missing dinner with her and the boys for the third night in a row, he headed out.
But so far, nothing! If something didn't happen soon . . . Augie had better have a good explanation for this one if he wanted to keep his face from being rearranged! There were plenty of men in the bar, but no one had even come near him. As for the women, that was another story. Every man he'd seen enter the place was almost instantaneously approached by at least three females—himself included. Nedlindger's wasn't usually that kind of place, but tonight was a whole different story.
He didn't think he'd ever seen so many pairs of long legs in one place. Maybe it was just the fact that he hadn't really seen his wife in close to a week. Yeah, they worked together. And yeah, they had finally come clean about their secret marriage a few months ago; the address on his personnel file now officially read 4247 Maplewood Drive. But falling into bed totally exhausted from work—not to mention keeping up with two teenaged boys and an extremely active mother-in-law—wasn't enough. If he soon didn't have some private time with his wife, he wasn't going to be responsible for his actions.
Oh no, here comes another one, Lee said to himself as he watched a particularly well-endowed blond enter the bar. She beat a direct path from the door to the empty bar stool at his side. This one was going to be trouble. Did he have a sign on his back that said "Hit on me"?
As she settled onto the stool, she gave Lee a sultry stare. He usually wasn't this forward, but his patience had just about run out. This time he was going to make the first move.
"Look, you have me all wrong lady. I'm sure you could make somebody's night—just not mine, ok? You look good, but I'm getting ready to go home to my wife. She has all of my love and has for a long, long time. And I know I have all of hers. I will be staying in her arms tonight, not yours. So, I bid you adieu." He started to rise off his bar stool. The hell with his contact-he needed to get out of there.
As he started to stand, she placed her rather large hand on his arm, holding him there. "Hey, hold on there. I just wanted to ask if you've seen the new Harrison Ford film," she said in a deep baritone voice.
"What the . . . " responded Lee, as he took a closer look at the woman next to him. Boy, I really have had too many drinks tonight if I honestly thought this was a good looking woman. This was no woman; "he" looked like Godzilla in drag.
"Ah . . . sorry . . . no, I prefer to read the book." As soon as those words were out of his mouth, the contact shoved an envelope into his hands and took off back out of the bar.
He really did need to sober up. Luckily Francine wasn't here to see this one; she would never let him forget it!
"Ned, could you please call me a cab," Lee asked as the bartender came by.
Ned, having heard Amanda's response to him many times before said, "Ok, you're a cab. And I will make that phone call right now." He smiled and winked at Lee, then headed to the phone at the other end of the bar to make the call.
Thirty minutes later, Lee was unlocking the front door of Maplewood Drive—his home. Everything was quiet! The boys would be in bed, and he guessed that Dotty was enjoying her nightly soak in the tub. But where was his wife?
As he climbed the stairs, he could see a faint light coming from under the bedroom door. As he guessed, his wife had fallen asleep, the book she had been reading resting on her chest. He quietly slipped out of his clothes, then carefully slid the book out of her hands and turned off the light. He had just settled under the covers when Amanda's silken form wrapped itself around his body. She was still asleep but had sensed his presence in their bed.
A pleasant smile came to his face as he gently kissed her temple. He knew he would always stay true to her, as she would to him. Even a few more drinks would never change that. Besides, he was going to have enough of a hangover in the morning from the drinks he did have tonight. Hopefully it wouldn't be too bad. He did have to get that envelope to Billy as soon as possible. And if Billy was in a good mood, well . . . just maybe he could get a few days off for himself and Amanda. After all, he had more than earned them tonight!
HONEY, I'M GOOD
Nah nah Honey, I'm good
I could have another but I probably shouldn't
I've got somebody at home
It's been a long night here and a long night there
And these long, long legs are damn near everywhere
(hold up now)
You look good, I will not lie
But if you ask where I'm staying tonight
I gotta be like oh baby, no baby, you got me all wrong baby
My baby's already got all of my love
So nah nah Honey, I'm good
I could have another but I probably shouldn't
I've got somebody at home, and if I stay I might not leave alone
No, Honey, I'm good
I could have another but I probably shouldn't
I've got to bid you adieu
To another I will stay true
(oo oo I will stay true)
(who who I will stay true)
Now better men than me have failed
Drinking from that unholy grail
(Now check it out)
I've got her, and she got me
And you've got that smile, but I kindly gotta be like
Oh baby, no baby, you got me all wrong baby
My baby's already got all of my love
So nah nah Honey, I'm good
I could have another but I probably shouldn't
I've got somebody at home, and if I stay I might not leave alone
No, Honey, I'm good
I could have another but I probably shouldn't
I've got to bid you adieu
To another I will stay true
(oo oo I will stay true)
(who who I will stay true)
Oh, I'm sure ya, sure ya, will make somebody's night
But oh, I assure ya, assure ya, it sure as hell's not mine
Oh, no, Honey, I'm good
I could have another but I probably shouldn't
I've got somebody at home
And if I stay I might not leave alone
No Honey, I'm good
I could have another but I probably shouldn't
I've got to bid you adieu
To another I will stay true