"No."
"Yes."
"No."
"Yes."
"No."
"Pepper, come on."
"Tony, I said no. And that's it."
Pepper held Tony's gaze for half a minute, her eyes taking on that professional and stern look that she wore incredibly well well under her bangs. Pepper Pots to the max. Tony finally sighed and looked at the enormous picture hanging on the wall in front of them.
"You don't think it looks nice?"
"My guests won't think that it looks nice- it makes me look like I worship you or something."
"Everyone knows that already."
"Well, I told you you could put it in the garage-"
Tony threw his head back like a toddler. "I don't want it in your garage. I want it in your living room so every body can see it."
"Why does everyone have to see it? Can't I see it by myself?" Pepper crossed her arms and studied it with distaste.
Tony stared at her with disbelieving eyes. "You don't even like it, do you?"
"Don't be ridiculous-"
"No, I know what this is now. You're not embarrassed by it, you're just trying to cover up the fact that you think it's ugly. Admit it!"
Pepper sighed. "You know what, it's a little on the homely side-"
"Homely? We're not talking about an ugly girl with a nice personality Pepper, we're talking about a painting!"
Pepper widened her eyes and gestured her arm at the painting, letting her hand slap against her hip. "Can you blame me? Look at it! It looks like somebody threw...buckets of red and gold paint on heads of human hair and shaped it into an Iron Man suit."
"Because that's what it is! I told you it's a portrait of me in my suit made of donated human hair!"
Pepper hissed between her teeth and threw an arm over her forehead. "I don't want to see that thing in my house. It creeps me out."
"It creeps you out? It's a picture of me, Pep!"
"I promise you, Tony, it would creep out any normal-"
"I'm not normal?"
"-human being on the planet. So take it down, now."
Tony pursed his lips and turned to the five foot by four foot painting hung on the wall of his girlfriend's living room. It had cost a fortune to hire someone to conduct this thing, and had taken one year. One damn year. He sighed and turned back to Pepper.
"Tell you what. I'll hang it in your office."
This earned him a series of slaps to the head, which he quickly turned into kisses.