In the heat of battle, amongst the madness surrounding his bones and the magic he wielded circling to the tips of his fingers, he knew he was in love with the man fighting by his side. The fire he spat from his hand was entrancing; watching it was similar to experiencing an epiphany of youth and fragrance. The blade he swung left a shining shimmer of the physical appearance from its existence in the air. When his mouth opened to unleash a cry of battle, it was simply nothing other than sweet music to his ears.

Perhaps Zell was hallucinating the senses he was receiving from the heat of the moment, or perhaps it truly was his feelings trying to tell him what was wrong.

A blast of snow burst from Zell's hand as the monster advanced itself. The spell connected just below the eye. The suffering creature shrieked in pain, and fell backward in a flurry of blistering ice. He personally congratulated himself, and peered over to his partner in battle.

Squall had taken down two creatures upon the prompt, dividing cut from his gunblade. Instantly, Zell felt a combination of jealousy and adoration fill his body. Neither of them could help it that Squall was a master of combat and ferocity. Zell couldn't help it if he possessed feelings for this incredible man either.

Another one easily brought to its feet. What would be able to stop this man from fighting? Absolutely nothing? He took note of Squall's divine step, allowing him the ability to move rapidly with ease. He began to take in the sight of his hair, trimmed neatly, but still dangling in clumps just above his eyes.

Zell longed to reach out and touch him to see what would happen. He started to imagine what could. Dazzling displays of light might break free from the spot he touched gingerly, because if he touched it without taking great care, he would not be able to touch him again. The leather of his coat would be pushed up against his back, spreading a sea of black shadows and white highlights across his physique. His muscles might flex in surprise to the foreign sensation, and he would feel it tenderly beneath his fingertips.

Two more monsters were cast aside.

Zell eyed his ally shyly. When Squall brought his head back, he would immediately throw his own head to the side, acting as if battle was the only priority he had. But he continued to allow his imagination to take flight upon the battlefield.

Squall's body wasn't the only thing that drove Zell mad. It didn't drive his genitals to expand cruelly – that only happened when he found himself in a mood so foul and dirty he would have to confine it to his dormitory late at night when the Garden was asleep – but he wondered why any self-respecting man would want to hide such a wonderful body from view. If Zell could see his body wanting to be let free from the restraint of clothing, he knew it had to be something worthwhile he was hiding. He could almost visualize what was underneath.

A body so smooth and perfect only Hyne himself would be able to cast such beauty upon the world… Zell's hand slowly reached out. Only Hyne himself, but anyone should be allowed to caress a delicate splendor…

Squall leapt from the side and drove his blade into the monster slowly creeping up behind Zell. With a flick of his wrist, he pulled back his arm and the blood splattered onto the edges of his blade. He grunted, and shook himself free of the slick, wretched blood. How revolting.

"What was that?" he exclaimed, stepping forward through the brush. "Couldn't you hear it from behind you?"

For just a moment, Zell could've sworn it wasn't merely a man speaking to him so, but the voice of an angel from the heavens. No other could sound more graceful, and most high. But Hyne knew he wasn't being true, and he had to admit defeat for his own sake.

"Oh, right. I mean, no, I didn't hear it."

Squall released a rather dissatisfied sigh and pulled back the tall grass. "You should pay more attention during battle. Don't make a habit out of slacking off."

It was oblivious to Zell how oblivious Squall was. Again, he seemed to hear nothing but the sound of a great saint's voice in the mist unveiling before him. He saw the frame of a man who had witnessed countless battles, stood strong above all, and felled every foe. Zell admired Squall tremendously for his courage and strength. He truly had the essence of a lion: fearless, commanding, dominant. What he wouldn't do just to be able to compare to him on any level of significance.

Zell trailed behind Squall, as he always had, watching his every move like a hawk in the sky, challenging his prey beneath him. The two pressed forward down the snaky path riddled with tall grass and covered with thick fog.

--------------------------------------------

"You want to practice the field exam with Squall?"

Quistis folded her arms across her chest at the notion. She didn't begin tapping her foot insistently, but Zell was expecting that soon enough. He would have to defend his reasoning before she became angered. He knew she would too.

"Why would you want to do something like that?"

"I haven't done any training in awhile. I could use the opportunity to do some catching up."

She rolled her eyes dully and replied, "You realize he's going to be carefully analyzing the area as a potential field exam for next year's students, right?"

"Well, of course I'm aware of that."

From her folded arms, she brought up one steadfast finger and held it close to his face. Yes, Quistis was indeed getting irritated. He thought it was unfair of her to get aggravated with him so easily. He hadn't uttered but perhaps twenty words.

She spat, "You'd only get in his way! The Commander is busy enough as it is!"

Zell was used to the abuse, so he supposed it wasn't worth bringing himself up to overcome it. That didn't mean he would go without a struggle, however.

He really wanted to be able to fight alongside Squall.

Just being in his presence was invigorating. He could feel his body tense up with anticipation every time. He would wonder if Squall would want to say anything to him, maybe ask him how his day was, or how many monsters he killed in the training center that morning. If it wasn't his presence that forced Zell to become so submissive, Squall's looks definitely did the job. Peering over to the side in Squall's direction was a pleasurable experience. He wouldn't be able to see his face exactly, and yet he was lucky enough to see what he could.

He felt so exalted, and privileged to look at him so.

Thinking about the Commander brought him back to at least try and verify his logic.

"Tch, thanks for believing in me, Quistis."

She sighed audibly, and audibly annoyed. Apparently, trying to win her over with guilt wasn't going to be fun. Zell knew Quistis wouldn't drag herself into something so childish and unlisted, but that was how he functioned. What was he but a good-for-nothing chicken-wuss? Immature, hyper, bouncing from wall to wall and from eye-to-eye…

The room was filled with the glorious tension. Quistis hated being disturbed between classes, but Zell didn't want to go to Squall about this. He didn't exactly trust Quistis's intuition, but the thought of him actually asking Squall to tag along scared him senseless.

She said, "Zell, honestly, he has enough on his plate…"

And just as Zell had predicted, her foot began to tap.

"Then why can't I help him? Bringing two people along would cut the mission time in half, don't you think?"

"Do you understand what he needs to look for while he's out there?"

Zell considered it momentarily, but only because his urge to fight with Squall by his side was winning the battle over his good judgment.

"Whatever it is, I can handle it!"

Oh no, he was letting his emotion get the better of him. He tried to mask his excitement by bringing back his lips, and instead, ended up with a cringe oddly cast upon his face.

Quistis didn't bother to notice. "Everything needs to be calculated carefully, Zell. We both know you're nothing more but a man of ignorance and act purely on impulse."

Silently, and with no emotion spread across her face, Quistis watched as the blow was dealt to him. He never was one to hide his emotions, however, he seemed to understand it well. He flinched, slightly, and hunched his shoulders in admittance, but she found that he had suppressed the impulse to act out based on what he felt. Surprising, of course.

She wondered why Zell would take a sudden interest in participating in Squall's work. He didn't hold any official rank other than his SeeD rank at Balamb Garden, but was he maybe considering a higher status? That wouldn't be possible for someone as worked up as Zell, but he was always proud of himself, and not vain, like many at Garden. He was a worthy ally, because he was always caring of others.

Somehow, she didn't think Zell had any intention of following what Squall had started, yet she just couldn't believe he had come to do some training either.

Wait, was it possible Zell wanted to spend more time with Squall?

"How could you say something like that, Quistis?"

Quistis wasn't able to make the connection quickly, and she almost asked Zell to repeat what she had said. But then she remembered what she had told him, and for a moment, she felt guilt take an unpleasant ride through her veins. How embarrassing it would be for Zell, if he indeed wanted to get to know Squall like that. She knew Squall would have nothing of it, especially with the recent break-up with Rinoa. He wouldn't be the type of person to switch sexuality just for the sexual relief. He had gone back to acting like the Squall she had taught at Garden before she had assigned them to the field exam they participated in just before graduating to SeeD status.

But, then again… maybe spending time with an old counterpart would bring him some much-needed happiness back into his life.

"Zell, I didn't… I didn't mean that. We're all stressed out about the recent workload."

He didn't seem swayed by her words. "Uh huh."

"Look," she said, uncrossing her arms from her chest. She massaged her temple gently. "How about I ask Squall what he thinks? Maybe he'll let you come along."

Zell's eye lit up from behind a misty veil of blue and gray. She expected him to jump up with anticipation, but he did no such thing. Not yet, anyway. Cautiously, he lifted his pupils up to hers, and she could envision content inside.

"You'd really do that?"

"Yes, Zell, I'll ask him later."

His closed hand came dangerously close to making contact with her body, but she backed away just in time. Had she not done so, she would be on the ground trembling in pain from the impact. Why did he always insist on wearing his knuckle busters even when he wasn't in combat?

"Oh thank you, Quistis! Thank you!"

He didn't realize he had come to within inches of striking her, and he certainly wasn't aware of his outburst. His boyish exhilaration had kicked into full swing… literally. He felt like a little boy of nine years, and it reminded him of the feeling he felt when Ma Dincht would add another gun to his collection, to display with pride in his room.

Is this how he really felt about Squall? Was it nothing more than a childish fantasy? Like adding another gun to his collection?

Couldn't be.

Quistis smiled anxiously, wishing he would leave her be. Her suspicions had been confirmed. She pat him on the back warily, and wasn't expecting the hug she found herself being pulled into.

"I really appreciate this," said Zell, squeezing his arms tightly around her body.

Quistis responded, rather nervously, "It's no trouble. Really. Now, come on… let me go."

"Oh, right. Yeah, sorry."

His grip loosened, and she was able to breathe once again. Why? Why did he always insist on having his knuckle busters?

She began to compose herself once more, carefully straightening her skirt and fidgeting with her tie. Quistis understood why Zell had come to her between the class schedule now, much more clearly than she had before. It really was too bad… she already knew the outcome of the conversation she would have with Squall later. She almost saw the irritation slipping hastily over his features, and a single hand would go to his forehead, as if to calm an oncoming headache. And Hyne knew she could relate.

That, however, would feel like nothing compared to the disappointment she would have to drop onto Zell later on.

For now, let him have his peace, she thought.