From everything Sora thought he would feel, given the current situation, the farthest thing in his mind was finding himself bored.

He had been in this… place, for what felt like an eternity, with nothing but white around him, and had more than enough time to cry, to get angry at himself, at Xehanort, get depressed, mourn for his friends, dwell on self-pity, cry some more, come to terms with what happened, remember all the adventures he had been through, all the friends he had made, wait… train, wait some more, and then wait some more.

So now, he was bored… like, really bored.

"God damn it Jarvis, I told you to pick the right door!"

"No you didn't, you just willed me to existence right here, along with this door, and made that excuse to make it look like you being late was not your fault."

"Hush you!"

A - surprise, surprise! - white door appeared out of nowhere, opening to reveal a guy with a red T-shirt, blue jeans and white sneakers stepping out of it, followed by some sort of… dog? Behind him.

-sigh- "You created me, and yet you hate me… why a dog?"

"I thought you wished to be a dog-anoid being?"

"Is that even a word?"

"Of course! Just like humanoid, but with dog instead of human!"

"I. Am. A. Dog. Period."

"Party pooper."

Sora was left speechless by the sudden randomness, not knowing how to stop the two… beings? Who kept bickering without even noticing him.

"-and that's why Nemesis could totally kick Bill Gates' ass."

"Let's just stop this nonsense and finally address the kid, he's been waiting enough time already, and I was happy with my nonexistence… until you dragged me here for this. Please tell me it will be just a One-Shot."

"Sorry darling, but it most likely will be a multi chapter one."

"Noooooooooooo!"

Ignoring the… dog's(?) Suffering, the human-looking guy finally addressed Sora.

"Yo!"

Sora just stared blankly at him.

"First, sorry for all the crap you had to go through, it was kinda necessary to establish the plot… sorry but lately I've been dry of original ideas."

The brunette raised his hand to signal he wished to speak, but he was totally ignored.

"Second, sorry for being late, but hey! At least you had enough time to sort things out, right? So, we fine?"

"Who the heck are you?"

The guy looked like he had been told Kingdom Hearts 3 had been canceled.

"How could you not know about me?"

"Just ignore him" the dog said with a tired sigh… is it a Poodle or a Chihuahua? "I'm some sort of mix between the two, apparently."

"Wha- How-"

"It would take far too much time to explain all this crap, and I'm not in the mood."

"You're never in the mood!" the still depressed guy- is that a rainy cloud hovering over his head? "Yes, it is!"

Anyway.

"So..." the dog continued, regaining Sora's attention "My name is Jarvis, and that waste of existence likes to be called Segaku."

"You were supposed to know that already!"

"Like I said, just ignore him. It gets easier with time."

Sora just nodded dumbly.

"We are… you could say gods in this place, omnipresent, omniscient and all-powerful… him more than me, sadly, since he created this" the dog- Jarvis, signaled their blank surroundings with a paw.

"W-what happened?" Sora asked confused, not really understanding what was going on, but still curious about what Jarvis just told him.

"To be blunt?" the guy- Segaku, if he wasn't wrong, said appearing out of nowhere next to him, placing an arm around his shoulder.

He seemed to be around 27 years old.

"I'm 22 damn it! Why all the people think I'm older?"

Jarvis' advice of ignoring him, even if the brunet was creeped out, seemed like a good one.

"Anyway, Xehanort fucked you up."

Sora choked on his spit at the bluntness of the explanation.

"What? You know it's true, the old coot managed to forge the x-blade and used it to wipe you out like nothing."

"B-but then how-"

"Like the mutt over there told you- stop licking your balls! There's a kid here!"

"You made me a dog! Now deal with it!" Jarvis shouted back before continuing doing said… activity.

"We are gods here, so I can control everything to my wish. Here, look."

With a wave of his hand Xehanort appeared in front of them, looking really confused.

"What are- you, boy! What kind of trick is-"

"Oh, shut up old timer." Segaku said before snapping his fingers, and after that every time the Dark keyblade master opened his mouth different sounds came out.

A car's horn.

A kitten's meow.

A shotgun.

Tarzan's shout?

At that point both Sora and Segaku were rolling in the floor, holding their sides because of the pain caused by laughing so hard, and Master Xehanort was so red, of embarrassment or anger is unknown, that he looked ready to auto-combust.

"Ah, damn. That was a good laugh… now leave old coot, you served your purpose."

With another wave of the hand the old man was gone.

"Oops, forgot to give his voice back."

Back on the keyblade graveyard, Master Xehanort reappeared in front of Vanitas, who addressed him immediately.

"Where were you?"

Xehanort opened his mouth to speak, but instead of his voice the sound of a machine gun came out, making him clamp both hands over his mouth.

Vanitas just rose an eyebrow and cracked an amused smirk.

"Oh well, soon enough he won't need it."

"What do you mean by that?"

"Like I said, Sora buddy, I'm a god here so I've come on your hour of greatest need to help you."

"Help… my friends?" his face lit up like a zeppelin on flames.

"Yup! Bring back each one of them and make Xehanort as harmless as a kitten."

"You can do that?"

"Do I need to bring the old coot again?"

"No, no, but…" now his face darkened, and anger showed its ugly head on Sora's eyes, at the same time he summoned Kingdom key and attacked Segaku "Then why you didn't help us before!"

"Whoa, easy there dude!" the god said sidestepping the slash, and waving his hand, making Sora freeze on his spot "It's not as easy as you think, there are rules too, you know? Some help Jarvis?"

The canine mutation was sleeping on the chair where Sora was waiting for them.

"Ass, anyway. To put this simple, you are one of millions of versions of Sora out there… something like dreaming worlds? There is one, main timeline where all goes as planned, you could say, where you always defeat the bad guys, things go as you want them to, and everyone gets their happy ending. But, for each discarded choice in that prime world, let's call it, an infinite number or alternate routes branch in these alternate worlds. Once those are no longer linked to the prime world people like me can take control over them to do as we please… copyright can be a bitch…"

Sora seemed to have calmed down after hearing the explanation, and looked to be in deep thought.

"So…" he started "This fight, you couldn't change it?"

"Nope, off limits."

"But because I managed to beat Master Xehanort, this version of me, being defeated along with my friends, had to exist?"

"Yeah… in simple words that's what happened. You won't hit me anymore, right? Because it seems that position is uncomfortable."

"Nah, I'm just… confused…"

"Oh, I get why you are so blue." he said releasing Sora "It's not like there's an assembly line making Soras nonstop. That would be foolish, far too expensive, and alchemists would not cooperate willingly; something about the balance and chance of creating hideous chimeras, meh. Like I said, you are one version of Sora, not another Sora. You will never meet another Sora, because it doesn't exist, all those are just what ifs, not the real deal. Was the fight against Xehanort fake?"

"No…"

"See? I just took the worst possible outcome of that fight and took control over it. You are the very same Sora who fought against him, and this is your main timeline. It's just a bonus you got to meet the one in charge, and that I'm willing to help."

"So, I'm not another what if?"

"Your what ifs are, one, if you just plain won; and two, if you just plain lose. Right now your timeline is about me rescuing you and your friends and giving you a new adventure."

Sora still looked dubious, so Segaku did one more thing.

"Here, let me- done!"

"What you just did?"

"Only a little tweak on your head so you won't worry anymore."

"Worry about what?"

"Exactly!"

Sora just shrugged and decided to ignore the odd comment.

"So, you want me to help?"

"Yeah! I can't wait to see Donald, Goofy, Riku, Kairi, The King and everyone else again!"

"Yeah… about that…"

"What? You… you can't bring them back?"

"Of course I can! The problem is not them, it's you."

"Me?"

"Yeah, you see… I'll agree to bring them back, only if you promise you will act like you no longer know any of them."

"W- why!?"

"Like I said, there's a new adventure you'll do for me, but only you can do it, and after all that has happened they won't let you leave alone… especially with what I plan on doing…"

"I know they can-"

"They won't, I know it."

That shut Sora up, and made him ponder for just some seconds.

"They will be safe?"

"Totally, and this won't be permanent, I swear. Once you are done with what I have planned, you will be free to return to your friends… if you wish to."

"Why I would not want to?"

"Just ignore that. So, you in?"

"... Fine, just to save my friends."

"I promise you, you'll make new great friends, and some of them will even join you, so you won't be alone."

Light started to shine around Sora, making him float.

"Hey Segaku, thanks for this chance."

"Don't thank me yet kiddo, you might be cursing me before this is over."

Sora just laughed before he finally disappeared.

"It would have been easier if you just erased his memories, instead of making him fake the amnesia." Jarvis said sitting in the chair, now looking like a man around 30 years old, wearing a tuxedo.

"Nah, it's always more entertaining when you force the main character to do something he doesn't want to, besides, once Sora escapes they will go after him and the chase will be half of the fun!"

"Hmmm… from that perspective I guess it does makes sense."

"This looks like it'll be a fun ride."

"It seems so" Jarvis said now standing "Let's just hope you don't go on hiatus this time." and with that he vanished.

"I am not in hiatus! I'm just way too busy!" And Segaku was gone too.

(a/n): That was... interesting, hope you liked the randomness and it made you smile, tell me if I should keep it up, and have a happy new year! I'll try to work on the other stuff now that I'm out of classes (at last!) so... see ya' :D