Sometimes I forget that Amazingphil isn't actually my bestfriend. I know that there are others like me, who love this boy to death. So here's my story of how I met AmazingPhil. The first video I ever saw of him was bloopers from Philisnotonfire4.

Disclaimer: I don't own AmazingPhil

You were beautiful to me.

First time I saw you. In the bloopers to another video. You were sat on a colourful bed with another. Another beautiful human.

You laughed with him. You constantly fixed your hair. You covered your mouth when you laughed. You just bounced and seemed to scream, 'I am happy.'

But the thing I remember most was the way I was sat on my own bed, with earphones on, in the dark. Shaking with the laughter that you gave to me. My sister on the bunk above me thought I was crazy, when she saw it was only a British boy with a fringe.

But you made me laugh out loud when I was by myself. You made me cover my face and grin when you did something cute. You made me blush when you did something hot. And you reminded me of innocence.

The other tried to make you swear. Say something that you didn't want to say. And you didn't... You thought about it for a second but you didn't say it.

I feel silly and dumb and slow when I don't get the jokes my friends make. But you are proud of the cloud over your ears. And I should be too.

I started watching other video's of you. It was beautiful. I started talking about you more. I started wanting more. I joined Twitter because of you. I spend more time on Instagram because of you. I watch more YouTube because of you. I've made such good friends from across the world because of you. I smile more because of you.

One of your friends said you walk half in a different world.

I do too.

I see things others can't quite see. I see beauty and hardship and poetry and pain. You know it, we're the same.

You didn't 'save my life', you didn't stop me from hurting myself or hating myself, because I never did those things. I was happy, I am free.

So I don't feel special. I'm just another delusional fangirl, right? I only just found you out a handful of months ago... I'm just a fangirl without a special talent for drawing, or singing or making things. I can't think up witty reply's to your tweets right away. I'm just another subscriber. Right?

Wrong.

You were my first love from this world. It wasn't just a 'celebrity crush' because you're just an idiot with a camera. My love for you is deep and unlike anything I've ever felt. I'm alone a lot. I see boys but have no feelings for them. They are ordinary. And you? You're not something of this world. You are made up of stardust and fairy lights and something else I don't quite know. and I won't ever forget you. My first love.

And you are amazing to me.

And I love you, AmazingPhil.

And I know you love me too.