The Over
A/N: A quick write up following the end of exams. Hurray! I'm free for a month.
The title's stolen from UVERworld's song from the same name. I love that band!
Also, I'm working on this long-assed story which is taking forever to end. So please be patient. I'll try and post it up by next week. I love you all!
Warnings: None as such. The genre should say it all. But then again, the characters do not have names. But this goes under Naruto and Sasuke tag because I was thinking about them. So you can assume either to be Naruto and Sasuke. I hope that's not too confusing. T_T
Disclaimer: Naruto and all its characters are the property of Kishimoto Masashi.
"I've found someone" the sudden message on Facebook from him and you just stare at your computer screen shocked beyond thought. You had just logged in on a break from a tedious English exam and were goofing around with this girl from your Linguistics class when the message popped up.
What were you to him?
"That's…nice," you finally manage to type out after a long pause. It's not nice. The way he suddenly springs this on you is not nice at all. You've tried keeping in touch with the guy for so long, sent him messages not only on that wretched social networking site but also on his IM millions of times only to receive no reply. And then one fine day he messages you to tell that he's in a relationship.
What was your relationship with him?
"Thanks," he types and you take a long drag of your freshly lit cigarette stubbing it out after that.
What did those five years of knowing each other meant to him?
"Is he good?" you ask thinking about all the hardships the guy has faced all these years. Even now, the urge to go berserk and lash out at him takes a backseat and you just want to think about his happiness.
Were you two just friends with benefits?
"He's nice." He replies. It's an attempt to be vague, to not talk so much about his special someone.
"Does he make you happy?" you type your worries condensed in five simple words.
Or was there something more in between?
"He does. He really does," he types and you cringe when you can obviously see the way his happiness can ooze out of those words.
Are you happier than he and I could ever be?
"That's good to know," you reply for want of something better to say to him.
Was my existence in your life of such little importance?
"He's a wonderful person," he types and you want to close the chat window, log out and pretend you didn't read anything. But more than that, there are doubts and questions plaguing your mind and you want nothing more than to ask him and get it over with.
Could you ever have sufficed?
"Has this helped with your drinking problem?" you ask about his alcohol problem which is one of the many nightmares that have plagued his life.
Those broken pieces of him that you were given to heal…
"Yes, the last time I touched alcohol was about six months ago," he tells you and you nod a small knot in your stomach coming undone with the relief.
Those pieces you tried so hard to put together…
"And the drug addiction," you ask thinking about the problem that hasn't let him sleep properly since ages.
And yet every time you were only left thinking of a way to help when he moved on…
"He doesn't let me do drugs," there is pride you detect in his words and your heart squeezes painfully in your chest.
Leaving you alone in your misery and helplessness…
"That's amazing," you write back and the sincerity of your emotions takes you by surprise. His special someone is turning out to be a hero.
Letting each chance slip without a notice till you found him out of your reach…
"So…um…I was wondering if we could see each other one last time." He types and you squelch the urge to laugh incredulously at your screen.
Little does he know that you've loved him for three years!
"For what?" you know the answer. Hell you've known that the second you read that message.
How do you say goodbye to an unrequited love of three years?
"You know…grab a couple of drinks for old time's sake and…" he lets the statement trail off leaving you to fill in that huge gap which is staring at you.
It is true that you confessed once on a whim.
"That sounds nice," you reply thinking about the old times that you spent together. It wouldn't hurt right?
Even though you knew it was too late.
"Then let's meet up tomorrow," he writes and suddenly you feel all nervous and jittery inside. It's too soon. You think maybe he'd give you a couple of days to let everything sink in and once reality had hit you hard on your face, you could see him again and let him go.
Even though you knew he was broken beyond repair.
"Tomorrow?" the panic wants an outlet.
And he told you that to your face.
"Yeah I'll be leaving for home after that," so once again everything is by his order. You laugh inwardly.
And like a fool you laughed along thinking how silly you were.
"Um…I have an exam tomorrow," you type. You're really not ready for this.
A secret you had promised you'd take to your grave.
"Then after the exam?" he's unwilling to read between the lines. You sigh running a frustrated hand through your hair. You go through your plans for the next day. Hanging out with friends and chilling out after the exam can wait.
But like a fool with hope in your heart you'd said that to him.
"Sure," suddenly you can't get this over this. The sooner he goes, the faster you can move on.
Why were you always there when he was broken?
"That's great," he replies and you think how easy this is for him.
Why were you always so late?
"Yeah, so I'll see you tomorrow," you type and sign off too emotionally raw to talk about anything anymore.
Why were you even in love with him?
You sit there after that with your desk lamp on, your English book open just staring at the alphabet and thinking about your friendship with him. True, you'd started off as friends but somewhere you always knew that underlying attraction that lay there. Initially you did not talk about it, considering how he was dating one of your closest friends and how both of you were males. But one fine day you heard of their breakup and there you were playing the role of his best friend.
It was only when you two moved to the university that he acknowledged the attraction sleeping with you for the first time. The progress from there on had been commendable but then also you weren't up to the mark it seems considering how you both never dated but stayed as friends with benefits. In the beginning, you were fine with that too. This was a form of love to you and you'd be dammed if you threw it away only for want of a relationship.
Truth is you yourself were too scared of getting into a relationship with him knowing the way it could end for you. Maybe the fear of a bad ending always kept you at bay?
You sit there on your desk the entire night creating questions after questions and answering them one by one till your mind couldn't take it anymore and finally you seek comfort in the warmth of your blankets.
The next day, you dress carefully thinking that you'll leave for his place once you're done with your exam.
You sit there writing your paper like a robot answering which Shakespearean play the lines stated in the question paper belong to and the reference to the context but your mind is elsewhere. Your insides are so unsettled that the breakfast you ate in the morning is churning up inside your stomach threatening to rise any minute making you queasy.
How you manage to sit for a three hour paper and finish it, you do not know. All you know is that once this is done and over with, you're going to have to man up and face your destiny.
Once you step out of the examination hall, you power up your phone and wait impatiently as it opens. You're particularly glad it doesn't take so long and you quickly launch the Facebook app and your heart thumps madly in your chest when the message icon shows one.
"My friends suddenly decided to come over to my place so I don't think I can meet you. So I guess this is it then…" this time you laugh outright. Not at him, not at the situation, you just laugh at yourself till your stomach hurts and people stare at you funny.
How could you ever love someone like him?
"Yes it is, goodbye," you type and pocket your device and make your way across the sidewalk towards your dorm. He never replies. You weren't expecting him to anyways.
How do you say goodbye to an unrequited love?
The End
A/N (ii) Finally cleared it of all grammatical errors!