DISCLAIMER: I do not own Harry Potter
Enjoy!
Courage
Tonks raced down the corridor, dodging jets of light coming from all directions, with only one goal in mind: find Remus. She'd already wasted enough time trying to convince her mother to let her go and to force her way through the fleeing students in Aberforth Dumbledores pub.
She saw a cloaked figure in the corridor up ahead and she sent a curse in its direction, missing by inches. When the person turned around, she recognised Dolohov and remembered what Aberforth had told her about last seeing Remus fighting this Death Eater.
A cold shiver ran over her body as she realised the full possibility of her husband being dead in the grounds. Tonks ducked behind a stone gargoyle, breathing heavily and wondering what she should do next. Dolohov was stalking down the corridor, coming ever closer to her, his footsteps getting louder.
Whether Remus was alive or not, the idea of the same man killing both she and her husband made Tonks' blood boil. Mustering up all the strength and courage she could, Tonks stepped out from her hiding place and raised her wand, prepared to duel to the end.
From under his hood, Dolohov smiled nastily, his eyes glinting at being able to kill his most recent victims widowed wife. There was something about it which made it all the more appealing and he supposed this was how the Dark Lord felt when he went after another family, almost eighteen years previous.
"Guess who I had the pleasure of meeting earlier," he sneered, making Tonks skin crawl. "Your dear, old husband, the werewolf. And do you know what I did? I made him suffer, made him scream until he was begging me. And then, I killed him! Yes, your vermin husband is laying dead in the grounds, but it's no good going to find him. He'll probably have been stood on by a giant by now."
Dolohov gave a harsh laugh as he said it. That was the thing with the stupid Order of the Phoenix. You had to make them feel like they're all alone in the world, make them suffer emotionally so that they feel like they have nothing left to fight for. Then when they're at their most vulnerable, you give them what they really want.
"I had the honour of meeting your filthy father, too. I watched him die. He snivelled like a baby, like the muggle he really is. And when this war is over, I'm going to find your mother and tell her how you hid from me. I'm sure her sisters won't mind me killing her, either. She's a disgrace to their family."
"You know nothing of my mother!" yelled Tonks. She could see what he was trying to do and it would probably have worked if she didn't have the life of her son on her mind. Only those who had been told knew that Teddy had been born and it was this that gave Tonks the strength to fire a curse at the beast in front of her.
This time, her aim was true and such was the force of it that Dolohov was flown backwards off his feet, crashing his head on the wall and knocking him clean out. Tonks' chest heaved as the adrenaline flowed through her body, but as she started to calm down, the truth hit her like a Killing Curse.
Her husband, the only man who ever saw her for who she really was, was dead, gone, and now she was trapped here with no where to go. Still, the only thing she could really think about was finding Remus. In a dream-like state, Tonks ran through the castle, feeling numb, firing curses and jinxes automatically, jumping over rubble and bodies.
In next to no time at all, she was out of the castle and trying to see the face of every body lying on the ground, trying to determine whether it was Remus or not. She saw adults and children alike, some as young as fifteen. She thought the school would at least monitor who got to stay behind, making all the children leave. But then she supposed that they must have snuck back somehow, loyal to Harry and the school.
She was nearing the lake when one body in particular grabbed her attention. She knew only one person whose cloak was that shabby. He'd refused to ever let her buy him a new one, and so as not to hurt his pride, she went along with it. But now she wished she bought him one, one she wouldn't recognise because she didn't want to have to find him, a cold shell of the man she'd once known and loved.
But as she got closer, there was no mistaking him. His cloak fastening was twisted under one ear, a leg was bent out uncomfortably, his mouth was slightly open and a large bruise covered one cheek.
Tonks fell to the ground and crawled to his body, seizing his clothes in her hands and giving him a little shake. His head rolled as she whispered his name, but there was no answer. Deep down, she knew there was nothing she could do, but it didn't stop her from trying to wake him. He just couldn't be gone, because they had a son to raise.
Though she didn't want to, Tonks stopped trying to bring him back. It was hopeless; he'd gone to a place where there was no war, no evil, only happiness. He would get to see his best friends again and relive the old days. Tonks put her head on his chest, looking up his body to see his face, her tears and sobs unstoppable.
It was like the ground had gone from beneath her. Nothing made sense anymore. Why were they fighting? What was going to be gained from it? They were meant to be fighting for a better future, but how could it be better if everyone was suffering with their losses? Everyone was going to lose someone they loved and they would have to live with that for the rest of their lives. Everyone would feel regret for not having done more, even if they'd done everything humanly possible.
And then it wasn't just humans who would have to live with their losses. Goblins had lost relatives, too and no matter who won, they'd wish they'd done more. Wished they hadn't scorned the witches and wizards trying to help them. It was the same with the centaurs and the giants. The centaurs might not be in the fight, but they were still dying and losing family. If the Dark side won, the giants would realise that they'd been lied to when they are made to live in secret once more. Everyone was going to suffer and nothing Tonks could do would ever bring back her husband or her friends.
As she buried her face in Remus' chest, she heard a cackle above the roar of giants and crashing as the castle fell to pieces. She didn't need to look to know who it was; that laugh had haunted her dreams ever since that night at the Ministry when Sirius died.
Lifting her head, Tonks saw her deranged aunt moving toward her, her footsteps drowned out in the noise. Tonks was beyond caring. Her son was going to have a happy life with his grandmother and if this was the way that she must die, then she welcomed it. She wouldn't be able to live without Remus, Teddy would never be happy because she just wouldn't be able to give him what he deserves. Without Remus, she would be as dead as he was.
Tonks didn't even say anything as Bellatrix stood over her. She had eyes only for Remus and as she took in his battered appearance, she remembered what he looked like the day Teddy was born. The sheer glee and pride on his face told her that all his previous doubts about having a child had gone out of the window. As he'd held Teddy in his arms, he'd looked far younger than she had ever seen him before and when he tore his eyes away from their son to smile at her, she knew they'd done the right thing.
And it was that image of Remus holding Teddy that was the last thing Tonks ever thought of as Bellatrix uncommonly killed her prey outright, rather than playing with it like she usually did. As she took her last breath, Tonks looked down into the eyes of her husband, prepared to see him again wherever it was they went after death.
A/N: A kind of companion piece for Wife, Daughter, Mother. Hope it's adequate.
F.W.P :)
