Author's Notes:

I came up with this when I remembered this argument I once saw for the idea that Yami and Atem are actually different people, and thus shipping them is not selfcest/masturbation/whatever you want to call it. For some reason, that stuck with me, even though I don't like Monarchshipping.

So I wrote this. Enjoy.

Atem still wasn't quite sure how it'd happened.

Out of all things he'd expected to encounter in his peaceful afterlife, the last thing he'd been looking for was...well, himself. Specifically, the spirit version of himself while he'd been using Yugi's body as a host.

He also hadn't expected to find that version of himself amazingly attractive.

Which probably said something about him, since this was still him.

There'd been no explanation, which had suited both of them just fine. Either way, it hadn't taken long before he'd decided said spirit version of himself would look a lot better without those leather pants.

Why he'd worn them at all was still a mystery, but that was a question for another time to be answered when his mind didn't feel so fogged over.

"Oh—oh—"

"Ngh—hn—ah—it's—this is—"

"I swear to Ra, if you say 'It's time to duel' one more time—"

"No, it's—I just—" Yami gasped, fingers scrabbling for purchase against the ground. Sweat beaded his forehead and trickled down his face, which was red beyond recognition, and Atem gave a low hum of approval. Yami threw his head back, panting. "How—how exactly is this possible?"

"What do you mean?" Atem was only half-listening, too occupied with tugging off Yami's shirt.

"I mean—" Yami sucked in sharply as Atem's mouth latched onto his neck, but continued, "—how am I here when you're here? Aren't we the same person? What does that make this?"

Now, that got the Pharaoh's attention. Atem paused, lifting his head. His brow furrowed in an attempt at concentration, his breathing coming in ragged gasps as he straddled Yami.

"Uh—" As much as Atem hated to admit it, Yami had a point. "...Narcissism?" he finally suggested, no longer feeling quite as in the mood for what he was doing now as it sank in. He shook his head slightly, trying to focus. Had there ever really been a term for this kind of thing?

But then again, it wasn't like this kind of thing had happened before, as far as he knew. The sheer lack of logic in this would be enough to make Kaiba pass out.

"...Incest? Masturbation?" Now Yami just looked unimpressed, and Atem scowled. "Okay, let's see you come up with something better."

"Why am I even here?" Yami asked, ignoring him—himself?—to glance around as if he'd only just realized where he was. "I am you. You just listed my ideas because they're your ideas, too."

"If that's the case," Atem began, "then..."

He trailed off, narrowing his eyes. "Wait a minute. If you're me while I was in the Puzzle and still with Yugi...then what is your name?"

Yami stared at him. "Atem."

Atem's eyes widened, a feeling of foreboding suddenly shooting down his spine like a chill. The realization of what this meant hit him at full force like a brick to the face, and for a second, he could only stare at himself, wondering how exactly to put this without sending him into hysterics, and therefore himself into hysterics, and thinking about this was really confusing—

And then the world imploded.

Meanwhile, from the shadows to which he'd been banished after his defeat, Yami Bakura watched the Earth's destruction. The smile on his face was nothing short of purely gleeful.

"And they all thought my arrogance would bring about the end of the world," he cackled to himself.