"Promises mean everything, but after they are broken, sorry means nothing." - Unknown
Drop
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Drop
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Drop
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Silence. Not a single sound could be heard. It was that kind of silence where you feel like you're crumble under all the tension.
'Hn, if Naruto were here, it sure as hell wouldn't have been so silent.'
'Cause it is the one thing Naruto absolutely despies with all his being. After all he had enough silence to last for a life time, thank you very much.
Sighing, Sasuke gets up out of his, no their, bed and retreats out of their bedroom.
He feels like he is gonna go crazy with that sufficating silence in that room.
The very room where not even 2 hours ago a fight had broken out between Sasuke and his boyfriend, Naruto.
He can't even remember why they were fighting, merely the fact that they were fighting stuck with him.
'Why do I always manage to mess up the good things in my life'
'Wouldn't be the first time, right?'
"I'm sorry Naruto.. so sorry" A single tear rolled down his cheek.
Even if he can't remember how the fight began, he definitely won't ever be able to forget how it ended.
The moment he broke his promise to his boyfriend of 5 years now.
You see, back in High School where they met each other for the first time, Naruto hadn't had it easy. While Sasuke was quite popular among the students, Naruto was the "weird one", the one noone wanted to befriend and who everyone kept their distance too.
The bullying he had to endure went only along the lines of verbal and emotinal abuse, none of the bullies tough enough to actually physically harm the blond.
Although if you would ask Naruto he wouldn't consider himself quite lucky. After all, sometimes words hurt more than physical harm.
Because when it's physical, the bruises will eventually fade away and with it the memory.
But verbal abuse lingers. It's like a stain of hurt that may fade but will never truly go away.
"A tongue has no bones. But it is strong enough to break a heart. So be careful with your words." - Unknown
And Sasuke knew what it was like to say things you didn't mean, to just have them vomit out, and then feel that crushing ache when you realized you could never pull them back.
Oh, Sasuke knew it all too well. After all, he hurt his dobe more than he could count for. Especially in High School.
It's not like Sasuke was one of Naruto's bullies. It's just occasionally he joined the others in tormenting him. He will sound like a huge douche bag but the reason he did it in the first place was because he was bored. Bored of the routine his life had took on.
He wanted a change. He didn't like that he could exactly pin-point what is gonna happen and when. He wanted control of his own life, to not let fate decide what will happen, but him. Him alone.
And his salvation came in the form of one Uzumaki, Naruto.
Sadly, this mind-set stuck with him for quite awhile. It took a lot of time and patience to overcome his way of thinking, to realize that what he did was wrong. There's no other way to put it. It was childish and inconsiderate, not to forget quite hurtful towards the most important person in his life.
Everyone else would have shown him the middle finger would he have tried to seek out their forgiveness, but not Naruto. Not his blond angel with his kind crystal blue eyes and a smile so bright it would put the sun to shame.
He forgived him. After all he put him through he forgave him just like that. And even though Sasuke knows that he should have persisted that the blond shouldn't forgive him so easily, he couldn't.
Because he had realised that he liked the blond boy. A lot. And he wasn't ready to lose him. Not now, not ever.
"Naruto", he had said, "I promise you with all I have, that I won't ever hurt you in anyway again. Not physically, not verbal. I'll do anything to make you happy, and to keep your trust in me. Never again will I hurt you, atleast not intentionally.
That I promise you."
That was more than 5 years ago. That very promise which was the fundamental of their relationship.
Sitting at their kitchen island, Sasuke held his head in his hands. He felt tired. Not tired of Naruto, he could never be tired of his reason to life, but tired with himself.
He can't do anything right. He always manages in one way or another to hurt the people he holds close to his heart. Especially Naruto.
"I don't know how you managed to stay with me for so long. All I ever did was to cause you pain yet you never gived up on me. You accepted my half-assed apology with a smile of your own. You told me 'It's ok Sasuke, really, I forgive you. What happened is in the past, let's focus on our future'... I truly don't deserve you."
Getting up from his position he walks to the fridge located at the end of their large kitchen. Arriving there, Sasuke couldn't take his eyes off of one of the polaroids hanging there.
Naruto loves to decorate their home with pictures of them and their friends. The halls were mostly adorning pictures of their friends and families. To be precise only pictures of Sasuke's deceased family. Naruto's parents lost their right to be parents the moment they kicked their son out of their lives for being gay.
Just thinking about them made Sasuke's blood boil. They should have been honored to have a son like Naruto. Because Naruto is flawlessly perfect.
From his good looks to his amazing personality he could be mistaken for an angel if you would ask Sasuke.
And to just think that Naruto is his, that he belongs to the Uchiha just as much as Sasuke belongs to him, makes his heart feel quite a spectrum of things.
'But after today I wouldn't be surprised if he breaks up with me'
Focusing his attention back on the picture he can't help but smile. It was a picture of them together on their very first date as a couple. In the background you could see a huge ferris wheel which was light up with many different colors. In the center of the polaroid you could see a smiling Sasuke carrying a laughing blond boy on his back.
Sasuke could remember it all to well..
"Sasukeee carry me" whined Naruto.
After their date in the amusement park Naruto was quite adamant to get Sasuke to carry him. Not that he felt tired per say, he just thought it would be a fun thing to do.
"No" was Sasuke's quick reply. He couldn't help the smirk that took over his face though.
"Please"
"No."
"Please with a cherry on top"
"No with a fist on its way if you ask again"
"I will kiss you if you do"
Sasuke stopped. "What!?"
Suddenly insecure Naruto back paddled.
"He he, I was just kidding teme, really, as if I would kiss you, I mean not that I don't want to but it's probably too soon and-"
The rest of what he wanted to say got lost as Sasuke pressed his lips to his in a gentle kiss. Blushing as Sasuke put his arms on his waist, he tentatively put his arms around Sasuke's neck to deepen the kiss. After a heart beat or two, they seperated while staying in their embrace.
"You know", Sasuke began, "you are one of the most beautifullest people I ever had the pleasure of knowing", ending his speech with a kiss on the back of Naruto's hand.
Despite the blush on his face, he couldn't stop the grin from taking over his face.
"Teme, 'beautifullest' isn't even a word. I thought you were supposed to be the genius one here" teased Naruto.
Smirking, Sasuke pulled Naruto closer so he could whisper in his ear, "You right, but even with my enormous available vocabulary I can't think up one word to describe just how perfect and amazing you are. So I guess making up words help, don't you think so too dobe?"
Naruto knows he is blushing quite heavily now, so he hides his face in Sasuke's neck.
"Shut up, Teme" I love you
"Hn" I understand. I feel the same.
Freeing himself from Sasuke's grip he looks him in the eyes.
"Sooo I guess this means that you have to carry me. You know since I fulfilled my part of the deal"
"What deal dobe. There wasn't one to begin with." Despite that he still turned around to crouch on his knees. "You have 5 seconds to get on."
Not wasting any time, he jumped on his back and hooked his arms around his neck.
"He he, thanks Sasuke-teme."
"Shut up, usuratonkachi."
Sasuke still can't believe that not even 1 minute later a old man approached them with a polaroid camera in his hands, taking a picture of them while they were still engrossed with each other.
Needless to say that this is his favourite picture of them together.
Looking at the clock on the wall, he can't believe it's alreaddy past 8 pm. 'Huh, time flies by when you're lost in memories.'
"That polaroid is my fav one too, you know.."
Gasping, Sasuke turned around as fast as he could. There, standing in all its perfection, was Naruto, his boyfriend.
Not able to produce a sound he was left gaping as Naruto slowly made his way over.
"I guess you were so engrossed in the memory that you didn't even notice the click on the door nor me making my way through the house."
Sasuke still wasn't able to say anything. His eyes were focusing on one point only. On the spot on his boyfriend's left cheek which was still a bit red.
'I did that. I fucking did that to him. How could I.'
Noticing that his boyfriend's gaze is on his cheek, Naruto took hold of Sasuke's cheeks, forcing him to look into his eyes.
"Sasuke", taking a deep breath, "it's okay."
Widening his eyes in shock at his boyfriend's words, he could just stare at him.
'Okay? It's okay? It's not fucking okay'
"Really Sasuke, don't beat yourself up over it. It's okay. It's in the past. I forgive yo-"
"No."
Startled, Naruto looked at Sasuke. "What do you mean 'No'?"
Forcing himself to look into the crystal blue eyes, beautiful like the endless blue ocean, so wide and honest, he says through gritted teeth.
"It's not ok Naruto. Do not forgive me this easily. What I did was unforgivable. I punched you. I hurt you. Even if you try to deny it, which I know you will cause you are just too kind-hearted to let anyone be sad, it is true. You should be angry at me. You should want to hurt me. You should want to let me suffer. And I would understand that. Really I would. The only thing which I can understand though is you trying to forgive me when I so clearly hurt you. I'm sorry Naruto. I wish I could be perfect for you, I-"
"Shut up"
"What?"
"Just shut up." When Sasuke opened his eyes again which had closed during his monologue, he noticed right away that Naruto was crying. Endless tears streaming down his face.
"What's wrong? I'm sorry please don't cry dobe. I'm sorry to have upset you I just-"
"Sasuke"
"Hn?"
Pressing a soft kiss on his lips, Naruto pulled back to gaze at the eyes of his lover. The beautiful onyx eyes which are always holding so much love and passion towards him. The eyes who make him feel like he is the most important person in Sasuke's life. But now there was also self-hatred and sorrow there which just broke his heart. Sasuke should never feel like he is not good enough.
Taking a deep breath, Naruto focused all his being on the man right infront of him. The man who knew him inside and out like noone else. Naruto is sure that they were made for each other.
"Sasuke I love you"
"Naru-"
"I love you so much Sasuke. My heart only belongs to you. I love you so much. You are the only one who understands me, who loves me for who I am. I'm always thinking about you, noone else. Don't force me to hate you. Let me forgive you. I need you Sasuke. The last few hours were just horrible. The moment I left I already missed you so much. It felt like my heart was being squeezed so much that I had difficulties breathing. I can't exist without you.
I have always loved you. Everyday. Every hour. Every minute. I never stopped loving you. So please, accept my forgiveness."
By now, both had tears streaming down their faces.
Trying to find his voice, he pulled his blond angel close to him.
"Thank you Naru. I love you. I love you so much. Thank you for forgiving me. Thank you for loving me. I love you. You're perfect. I'm sorry. You deserve so much better but I just can't let you go. I'm just that selfish."
Smiling through his tears he manages to mutter out, "I'm glad you're selfish enough to not let me go, you know."
Sniffling, he whispers "I love you."
"I love you. With all of my being."
Both resumed to hug the other as tight as they could. Because they know that a love like theirs is something unique which you don't just give up.
And they know that they have to talk this whole matter out. That this is something that will linger with them for quite awhile, maybe forever.
Because forgiving is easy, to forget though is a whole different situation.
But they have time.
For now they are content with just holding their significant other in their arms.
- End -