Glass Mirror
A Glass Mirror
Hangs in front of me
A soft hazy image appears
An ideal reflection of me
But it's wrong
A boy gazed at the mirror, staring at his reflection. His piercing green eyes stood out against his pale skin, and his wild black hair lay oddly tame against his forehead. The blantant tears in his eyes shimmered beneath silver framed glasses. A lightning shaped scar on his forehead, pure evidence to who he is. Harry James Potter, the boy who lived and killed Voldemort in the final battle, his final year at Hogwarts.
Harry continued to gaze at himself in the mirror, wondering out loud to himself, "Why aren't I different? I did everything that was expected of me, but why do I feel so empty… so alone?" Touching his face with soft hands. "It's not worth it, I don't think I can stand it much longer. Am I going crazy?"
People stand
On the other side
My family; my friends
My worst enemies
Staring through
The glass mirror
They don't understand
They look at me but do not see
Who I am underneath
Just a glance
"Come on, Harry! What's wrong! It's just two weeks! I need you there! You're my best friend!" Ron begged.
"Ron, honestly, I'm happy for you and Malfoy, but I don't think I could spend two weeks with his uncle!" Harry protested.
"Harry! My weddings at the end of those two weeks! And you're my best man! Can't you try to indure Severus for two weeks! You won't regret it, I promise!"
"Alright, Ron. If that's what you want!" Harry forced a happy smile onto his face.
Ron grinned, happily, "Thanks, mate!"
"Your welcome. I gotta go pack, I'll see you later!" Harry called, over his shoulder as he ran out of the room.
Big blue eyes
Gentle blond curls
Along with a sweet smile
And all they can see
Is pure innocence
"Hello, Potter. Welcome to my humble home," Severus Snape stated, softly.
"Professor," Harry stated, smiling sweetly. "Thank you for allowing me to stay in your home."
"Your welcome, but school's out and your no longer my student, you don't need to call me Professor," Snape said, staring at Harry, taking a step towards the younger man.
Harry saw Severus' shoes come closer and his eyes flew up to meet Severus' in shock, backing away quickly. "I-I need to go… ummmm… unpack… or sleep… or something…" Harry stuttered, fleeing in a random direction.
Severus watched Harry run off, muttering softly, "How can the innocence stay with you like that, after all you've been through, my fallen angel?"
This isn't me
Or maybe just a part
A sing drop of rain in a storm
One pedal among the
Blood red rose
'Oh my God… he… he tried to… I can't let anyone get close, if he gets close he'll die… maybe if I go first I can save them all from death… if I die, they're out of danger.' Harry thought, picking up the shaving razor he had found in the bathroom, and holding above his left wrists. He stared at the pale skin of his wrist as he cut over and over again. He stared as the blood spilt from the cuts.
Mesmerized he gazed at his wrist, he lifted it into the air, watching the blood trail down his arm.
Then a piercing knock rent the air.
"Harry, are you in there?" Severus' voice sounded through the door, knocking the rest of the trance out of Harry.
"Just a minute!" Harry called, quickly cleaning up the blood and wrapping his arm in a towel, and he pulled his long sleeve shirt over his head, he answered the door. "Yes?"
"Dinners ready, and Ron and Draco are here," Severus said.
"Alright, I'll be out in a moment." Harry smiled then closed the door, firmly.
I see her face
Hidden deep within
The tempestuous glass mirror
Jagged green eye
From the life
That she lead
Harshly stared through
The sharp glass between our worlds
I hear her voice
An ever-faint echo of my life
Whisperings of my faults and goodness
Resentfully weeping our story
To the bitter winds
'Hello, Harry,' a female voice said in his head. 'You like Severus don't you? To bad your not good enough for him… he's beautiful… and your ugly fat and weak…'
'No, Severus is Draco's uncle! I don't like him.'
'No you don't like him,' she said, sweetly. 'You love him. But you'll never be good enough, besides even if you were you'd just kill him like you killed your parents and a lot of the world.'
'No… it's not true…'
'Oh, yes it is, but he hates you, so it makes no difference. Why would he want a broken little toy like you! You haven't been the same since they took you away from Tom and then forced you to kill him!'
'No… no… no…' tears were pourinng down Harry's face.
'Tom was your first… You both looked good together. The master and his numb little slave. Though he never really loved you. You were just a fun little fuck.'
'No…No…No…No…' Harry started muttering out loud, "No… No… N-no…" Evil laughter was heard inside Harry's subconscious.
I listen
To her murmers
Of my Past, Present, and future
Knowing in the end
She is right
The sea
Of people from my life
Stare back at me from the coolness of the mirror
Seeing what they want
Judging
It hurts
To keep these painful secrets
Away from the ones I know and love
To hide myself away from them
Unknown
"Ron, why did he have to be here the whole two weeks? He hasn't left the mansion for two days!"
"Drake! Harry's sad! You remember how he was after we saved him from that bastard! He was broken! You saw those skimpy clothes he wore!"
"Well, I sure hope Sev can handle him!
Come on, Drake! Sev's an ex-DEATHEATER! Why wouldn't he be able to handle Harry Potter?"
"Because Harry Potter is depressed, and a powerful wizard who's depressed is never good!"
"Drake, Harry's not depressed, he's just got a few after war jitters!"
"Whatever you say darling!" Draco stated, pulling his redheaded finance into his arms for a deep passionate kiss.
I'm not free
To dance upon the air
I'm caught between heaven and earth
Too scared to face the fire
So I stay
Lost and alone
On the other side of a smooth glass mirror
Too familiar with
Detachment
'Your detached, lot of good that'll do you!' The female voice commented, in Harry's head.
Harry had been staring in the mirror, 'I'm not detached! I'm at unawares!'
'Unawares, do you even know what that means?'
'Yes.'
'Sure, whatever, you little whore! Your going to miss dinner!' She said, mockingly.
"No!" Harry cried out, suddenly, and he ran down to the dinning room. Severus, Ron, and Draco looked up when Harry entered, face pale and drawn, looking as though the dogs of hell were chasing after him.
"Harry, what's wrong?" Ron asked, in an odd, scared tone.
"Potter…" Draco said, touching Ron's shoulder in comfort.
Severus took one look at Harry's pale and drawn face, and he swiftly walked to Harry and pulled up the sleeve on his left and right arm. He gazed at the pale pink scares on Harry's left arm, and he touched them gently, then he pulled Harry into his arms.
Harry started shaking convulsively, "Sev, it hurts… it hurts… they… they won't… they won't leave me a-alone… stupid mask… hurts… so bad… help… hurts…"
Severus nodded to his godson and his fiancé and picked Harry from the ground and carried the boy to the master bedroom.
I fake who I am
Among all my friends
Hiding my thoughts and emotions
My secrets I bury deep
Within my heart
The cold glass
Separates me from them
And if they glance at my reflection
All they see is the glassy
Reflection
I stare into
The cruel glass mirror
Staring at my reflection in the tranquil glass
It wavers; it trembles
Will it break?
Severus walked into his bedroom and over to his bed carrying the shaking bundle, and placing it gently on the bed. The bundle cried out when Severus tried to move away, Severus quickly rearranged himself, and lay down with the trembling bo-young man. He pulled the bo-young man into his arms, cradling him, and rocking him, if only to calm him down a bit.
Harry continued mumbling, "Sev, it hurts… so bad… no peace… won't leave me alone… 'm not good enough… 'm a slut… whore… bitch."
"Your not a slut, whore, or a bitch, Harry," Severus whispered, gently.
"I am… Tom… he… I was… his… he owned me…" Harry muttered.
"Harry… damnit boy, listen to me!" Severus said, when Harry ignored him. Harry's head snapped up and he looked deeply into Severus' eyes. "You are not a whore! Tom Riddle doesn't own you! If you need to be owned, it's not by that self centered ass hole!"
"I belong to him… Sev, he owns me… I told him I wanted… you…" the last word was a faint whisper that Severus almost missed. "Own me… not him…"
Will I break?
Harry fell asleep in Severus' arms, but Severus still didn't want to leave him. Severus completely healed the scars on Harry's arms, and the just held him as he slept. Thinking all through the night.
'Why is it so hard for Harry to open up? He used to be so easy to read, and he would be so beautiful, but then… when did he start to change? And why didn't we notice that our beautiful savior was trotting down the one way street towards self-destruction? How can we pull him back from the edge that he's drawn like a moth to?' Severus thought.
Harry's Dream
In a cold dark cemetery, Harry Potter stood, surrounded by the deceased. Every one, every last rotten one, of the people who died during the war were standing around him.
Suddenly a fair skinned woman with pale blonde hair and striking silver eyes, swooped forward, the woman looked very much like Draco Malfoy himself. "Harry Potter, my name is Rose Malfoy, it's a pleasure to finally meet the person with whom my sister has been speaking." Suddenly the scene changed and Harry and the blonde woman named Rose were standing my the ocean in the sunlight. 'I can't talk for long! She'll find out I'm here. I'm not dead, though I do exist. I'm here to comfort you against what my sister has said, Annabelle Malfoy is a spiteful bitch, and she's angry about Draco marrying that lovely Weasley boy. You must not listen to her! Listen to Severus he knows of what he speaks… Don't fear… it will all be made simpler soon, my sister shall make a mistake." She stated when she saw Harry fear, she smiled gently, leaned down and kissed Harry on the forehead, whispering, "Take care my raven haired angel," and she was gone.
The thick pressure
Builds all around me
The air becomes deep and heavy
The ocean of people
Becomes blurred
Harry awoke in Severus' private chambers, and it was full of people, he couldn't see them clearly, meaning something was wrong, they were all blurry and he couldn't tell who was whom. His glasses were placed on his face, and yet he still couldn't see anything clearly, except for Severus. Severus was sitting close to Harry with one arm curled around his waist. Harry sighed and curled into Severus' arms, ignoring all others.
Voices, every where, they kept asking him what was wrong, why he wasn't answering, but he was to tired to move any part of his body once he was curled close to Severus. He knew Severus would protect him. "Don't let them hurt me, Sev…" Harry begged in a quiet tone, close to Severus' ear, then the air started getting thicker, and his eyelids harder to hold up, soon Harry's body and entered unconsciousness.
It's getting harder
To fake who I am inside
The glassy mirror violently quakes
I must keep standing strong
I must not break
Severus was holding Harry when Harry next awoke. They were alone, in Severus' chambers.
"Severus… I'm sorry…" Harry whispered, tears welling up in his eyes.
"Harry, you have nothing to apologize for, my raven haired angel," Severus replied, holding Harry closer, and unconsciously calling Harry the same endearment Rose Malfoy had.
"I… love… it hurts so much, Sev…"
"Why did you do it, my angel? Why did you hurt yourself? Don't you know how much it hurts me to know that you're hurting yourself…"
"How did you see them! I hid them… I know I did… how did you …" Harry freaked out.
"You didn't hide them, baby. Relax, I only want to help, I want to make you better."
"You can't… for me to be better… then I'd have to break… I can't break… that would be giving everyone to much power…"
The glass mirror
Begins to shiver slightly
Then to quiver, shake, tremble, and quake
A thin line appear, a scratch
On Perfection
"I love you, Harry, I want to help you get better, so that I can earn your love in return!" Severus murmured, pulling Harry closer.
Harry started to shiver slightly, the he began to quiver, shake, tremble. Then his slight body began to quake violently in Severus' arms, tears pouring down the innocent boy face. "I love you, Severus." Harry continued spasming, for about five minutes then he pulled back, and looked Severus in the eyes. Green eyes shining and red rimmed from the tears he just spilt, "I wanna tell you everything… I think… you can help me tear down the rest of the mirror that hides me from the world… please…" Severus could only nod.
The mirror shatters
Pieces explode
Flying across at me
My reflection splinters and cuts me deeply
Glass shards slash
Biting sharply into my skin
I cry out
Against the pain
My blood stains the broken glass
Bright red covering
Pale silver
"I loved him, did you know that Severus? He was a sick bastard, and he hurt me often, but I loved him in a twisted way… he showed me that if I wanted some thing enough I could get it whether it was from him or from someone else… I don't know, he was beautiful in his own way, and I hated when I had to kill him."
"Tom Riddle, you loved him?"
"As a father, not as I love you… those words used to be so difficult to say. I'm not a virgin, I'm a practiced slave. I know how to obey and I do it well, no matter who my master is… I can't… not obey an order… it just hurts to much to deny a prospective master or just plain master…"
"Master?"
"Uh huh… I need a new master… why do you think Dumbledore didn't have any trouble forcing my to kill Tom… I had to obey… or I would get hurt… Will you be my master?"
I lay there
Sobbing bitterly
The swarm of people left me alone
Blood and glass
Mix together
"You don't want to be my master do you? Did I do something wrong? Am I not to your liking? I can change, honest I can! Please…"
"I want to be your master Harry, I just don't know what that entails…"
"What ever you want it to entail, I belong to you, and only you."
"I can love you as I see fit? Will you have to call me master?"
"Yes, and only if you want me to, Master."
"Merlin, that sounds odd, Harry, just call me Sev." Harry nodded.
"You'll have to name me, Sev, I can't keep the same slave name I had under Dumbledore, you need to change it!"
"What was it?"
"Lemon."
"Ohhh…" Severus looked at Harry for a moment then decided, "How about Kitten?"
Harry's eyes lit up, "I like it, Sev… it's pretty…"
As I cry
My reflection
Returns dimly to the shattered mirror
I see through
The blood
Me.
My shattered image
Is my reflection of me; all the pieces
I am broken but whole
Me
TWO YEARS LATER
"Kitten," Severus said, walking into the library, where his kitten was reading.
"Yes, Sev?" Kitten answered.
Severus knelt on one knee in front of Harry, "Kitten, my beautiful Kitten, Will you do me the honor of becoming my husband?"
After two long years of pulling Harry out of his depression, Severus discovered that he would die should he lose Harry.
Tears filled Harry's emerald eyes, "are you sure, Sev?"
"More sure than I have ever been in my life, be mine for all eternity, Kitten, please?"
"Forever and ever and ever and always, my master, my Sev, my love!" Harry cried, throwing himself into Severus' arms, kissing him passionately.
Severus took the heart shaped emerald ring from his pocket and placed it on Harry's ring finger. "I love you, Kitten, now and forever."
"And I love you, my master, now and until the end of time."
Owari
Authors Note
Poem was written by WickedNeverland, who was nice enough to let me use it for this story!
I don't own any of this, just thought I'd tell you that, as if you didn't already know it! Anyways, please review, and don't flame because then, I'll probably cry, because I'm an over emotional wreck!