"Commander, there's an urgent-"Jacob's feet skidded to a stop at the top of the stairs in Shepard's cabin. Looking up from his datapad, he froze in complete and utter shock. Sprawled on the bed was none other than the famed assassin, Thane Krios. He was reading a book, completely naked besides the thin blanket covering his "special" extremities and a pair of reading glasses perched on his green nose. They locked eyes, frozen in a sheer moment of awkwardness.
"Um... okay...I'll… I'll come back later." Jacob stammered, effectively tripping on his own foot in his haste to get the hell out of the room, leaving him standing no nearer to the exit. The frills on Thane's neck responded for him, flushing a deep, scarlet red. His full lips twitched in the start of a response, but before he could speak, the bathroom door slid open and Commander Shepard strutted out, dressed in only a lacy black bra and underwear. Jacob flushed pink and threw his hands up to block his view. Shepard, all professionalism and grace didn't skip a beat.
"Hey Jacob." She said casually as she pulled over a t shirt. Picking a pair of leather pants off the floor, she tossed it across the room to Thane, who caught it purely out of reflex, his surprise and embarrassment still evident on his sharp features.
"Remember to request entrance next time." Shepard said, seemingly as an afterthought.
Jacob nodded quickly, barely stopping himself from looking at Shepard's form. It's quite surprising when you've never seen a person outside of three layers of armor, suddenly walking around in nothing. Immediately, Thane was at Shepard's side, looking incredibly uncomfortable with his green, muscled chest exposed, reaching to hold Shepard's arm. It was an obvious cue to leave. Whether they were just getting started or finishing up Jacob didn't know and didn't care. He was just about to escape when the words flew out of his mouth stupidly.
"I didn't know that both of you... where... doing uh..." He drawled.
"Well, that noise in the vents at night certainly aren't mice." Shepard replied coyly. Thane's eyes betrayed his mortification as Jacob awkwardly backed out of the door and into the elevator, stifling an obvious cough. When the doors had finally closed, Thane broke the undoubtedly awkward silence.
"Siha, was that… last part necessary?" Shepard smirked sexily as she placed her hand on his bare chest, no doubt still under the influence of her saliva induced high.
"Be proud of your work Thane, assassinating is not what you do best." He couldn't find any words as Shepard led him back to the bed and climbed over him.
"What a true warrior angel." He thought, as her spicy scent enveloped him once again.