Disclaimer: I own nothing.
Another angsty oneshot based off a song...this time Hinder's "Lips of An Angel" as the song. PLEASE REVIEW if you have a moment!
"Tamara, for the last time, I don't feel like going out tonight," Derek grumbled as his girlfriend stood in the doorway to his home office.
She glared at him. "What the hell is your problem, Derek?" she snapped. "We haven't been out in weeks!"
Derek rubbed his face with his hand and sighed. He was sick and tired of Tamara and her belief that she had to go out with her friends every night. His case load had been heavier and heavier lately, but that didn't stop his girlfriend from demanding social gatherings. He didn't know how the hell he had ended up dating her was beyond him. Seeing her again after so many years had just happened by accident, and soon they were in a full on relationship.
And it all had been in the aftermath of his breakup with her. It had been the most painful event in his life, losing her.
How had he come to lose her?
Oh, right. Her job requiring her to leave. She'd had to leave Quantico, leave him. The day she'd left, they hadn't even been able to say goodbye. It was better for them to just part ways like they would see each other again. But he didn't know if he would see her again. He didn't know if he could without having his heart ripped out.
So they'd skipped goodbye.
"You know what? Fine! Just sit in here and work," Tamara snarled. "I'm going to read in the bedroom. You let me know when you're ready to be civil." She turned on her heel and stalked out of the room.
Derek rolled his eyes and leaned forward, resting his elbows on his desk. He put his head in his hands and took a deep breath, hoping that when he exhaled all his heartache would go out in an instant. But when he breathed in again, his heart was still beating with an vicious ache that hurt his ribcage. Squeezing his eyes shut, he tried to push the image of her, her curvy figure, her honey colored curls, her sparkling brown eyes from her head. She just wouldn't leave him, though. She was stuck in his mind, trapped as if she had been sewn into the muscles of his brain.
As he opened his eyes and was about to return to work, his phone rang. Thinking it was Hotch, possibly calling about a case, he picked it up. But it wasn't Hotch who's name appeared on the caller ID, nor any other of his BAU team.
The ID read Penelope Garcia.
XXXXX
Penelope sat on her bed with her knees pulled up to her chest. She was staring at the unpainted wall of her bedroom in her Seattle apartment. Her new job was detestable. It was far from her home, her family, her love. Every day was one spent in depression, an unbearable dark that she couldn't figure out how to get out of. She was lost in that dark and without Derek, there was no hope of her finding her way out of the maze.
A few tears slipped down her cheeks, and she wiped them away hurriedly. She couldn't cry. It wouldn't do anything to make her feel better. Unless she had Derek, there was nothing she could do. Even though their relationship had ended before she left, not seeing him everyday made things harder and harder. Just the sight of him gave her strength. And without him she had no strength whatsoever.
What hurt worse than not seeing him was knowing that he had found happiness in Tamara Barnes.
Penelope looked out the window of her bedroom and observed the night skyline. The FBI had found her a great apartment, one in which she had a view of the Space Needle. But all the great views in the world couldn't make her feel better.
As she sat, she began to feel the depression weigh her down even more. Her impulses were beginning to get the best of her and she grabbed her phone hurriedly. She couldn't help herself from pulling up Derek's number.
She looked at the shining light of her phone screen through glazed eyes. Derek's name and photo ID were staring back at her, burning a hole in her chest. How had she let him get away? What had gone so wrong? They were best friends, they had one of the most intense connections anyone had ever seen. Usually Penelope felt like a strong independent woman, but what was the point of thinking she could take on the world when she didn't have the person who gave her strength? She was human, she needed human connection.
And the only person she really needed was Derek.
There were many people she loved - JJ, Rossi, Hotch, Reid, Prentiss - but if she was the only person left on the planet, the one companion she would want to be with Derek Morgan.
On a whim, she hit the send button and listened as the phone rang several times. She shouldn't have done this. It was likely he wouldn't answer her. They hadn't spoken in three months; it was likely he wouldn't want to break that streak.
But just when she was ready to put the phone down, she heard the line pick up and a deep baritone voice say a hesitant, "Hello?"
Immediately, her throat closed up and her eyes overflowed with tears that trickled in streams down her cheeks. She wiped them away and took a deep, shaky breath. She still couldn't find her voice.
"Penelope?" His voice was soft and hesitant as he spoke. "Penelope, are you there?"
She inhaled deeply. It was now or never. She just had to tell him that she missed him and still loved him.
"Derek..." she whispered tearfully.
XXXXX
Derek could hardly believe his ears when he heard Penelope say his name. It had been too long since he'd heard her voice. Something in him shifted as soon as he heard her speak. He felt like he'd been lifted up off the ground and life was being breathed back into him.
He'd thought he'd heard her say his name, but he wasn't sure. "Penelope, please tell me you're there," he said frantically.
A short cry erupted and he felt his heart clench at the sound of her sorrow. "I'm here," she sobbed.
"What is it, Penelope?" he asked in a whisper. "Are you okay?"
"No," she wept. "I'm not okay!"
He bent his head in shame. How could he ask such a stupid question? He already knew the answer. "I'm sorry," he whispered, rubbing his face tiredly. "I'm so sorry." He was trying to keep his voice as quiet as he could so Tamara wouldn't hear him. This was not a moment he wanted her barging in on.
"You're quiet," she sniffled. "Is everything okay? Oh, God! I'm probably interrupting you while you're doing something! I should never have called!"
Even though she couldn't see him, he shook his head vigorously. "No, no!" he begged, his voice still soft. "You didn't interrupt anything. Please don't hang up."
"Why are you whispering then?" she asked.
"Tamara's in the other room," he admitted. "We had a fight earlier. I don't want to talk to her right now. And if she knows I'm talking to you, she'll freak out." He sighed. "Baby Girl, what's wrong?"
"Don't call me that," she murmured tearfully. "You can't call me that. You're with Tamara. We're over, you can't call me things like that anymore."
A tightness filled his chest. "Penelope, you're the only one I want. I should have told you that before. I should never have let you go." He took another deep breath. "I love you."
"Derek, I love you, too," she wept. "And I miss you. I hate being apart like this. I hate that we didn't say goodbye before I had to leave. I just - I just hate all of this!"
An unusual occurrence happened just then. Tears began to burn in the back of Derek's eyes. "I know, Baby," he murmured. "I hate it, too. And I miss you...I miss you so, so much. Even you saying my name makes me feel better. You're the only woman I want."
She was silent for a long moment before finally speaking again. "I love you, too," she said. "And I won't lie to you. I haven't moved on. I probably never will. But I won't let you throw your life away for me." Another sob escaped her mouth. "Goodbye, Derek. I love you...I always will."
"Wait! No, Penelope! Don't hang up!" he begged.
But the line was already dead.
Cursing, he slammed his palm down on the desk in grief. He couldn't get rid of it, no matter how hard he tried. He rose from his seat angrily and in rage shoved all the items off his desk, the lamp falling to the floor with a loud crash.
Soon after, Tamara burst through the door and shouted, "What the hell is wrong with you?" Her face was set in a vicious glare.
Turning to face her, Derek ignored her question and and stormed past her, exiting the office.
"Don't you walk away from me, Derek Morgan!" she growled, trailing after him as he went to their bedroom and began to pull out a suitcase. "What the fuck do you think you're doing?"
He snorted. "What does it look like I'm doing?" he snapped. "I'm packing a bag."
"Well, that's not a bag you would take on a case," she said. "Where are you going?"
Finally looking up at her, he said bluntly, "I'm going to find Penelope. And I won't be coming back except to grab my things."
Tamara's face was filled with malevolence. "You're going to find her? What about me? Are you just going to leave me here?"
He nodded. "Yep."
XXXXX
Penelope was grabbing her purse to leave work after turning her computers off. She was ready to leave, go home and drown her sorrows in a bottle of wine. It was all she could do. Since saying her final goodbye to Derek two days ago, she had been nothing but depressed, grieving the loss of both her friend and greatest love.
It was more than she could bear.
When she reached the lobby, she pulled out her umbrella and looked out into the Seattle rain. It was one of the things she hated about Seattle: the seemingly never ending rain. Sighing, she opened her umbrella when she got outside.
As she started walking down the street towards her parking garage, a voice yelled out.
"Penelope!"
Whirling around, her mouth fell open when she saw Derek, in the flesh and dripping wet, rushing towards her. Almost instantaneously, her heart filled with joy and tears started rolling down her cheeks. "Derek?" she breathed hoarsely.
He reached her and she observed him, water dripping down his leather jacket and face.
She didn't even give him a chance to say anything; she merely dropped her umbrella and threw her arms around his neck, oblivious to the fact that he was soaking wet and that she was now drenched. She inhaled the scent of him and held him tightly, allowing him to wrap his arms around her and hold her close. A sob escaped her throat.
"I've got you," he murmured. "I've got you."
Pulling back, she touched his cheek with her palm. "What are you doing here?" she asked.
"I transferred," he said.
Her gut dropped. "Why - why would you do that?" Derek had given up the BAU? He belonged there, profiling with Hotch and the rest of the team. He shouldn't have left.
"I can't stand not having you with me," he said, cupping her face in his hands. "I moved her to be with you. I'm not losing you...I won't lose you. You being gone, it's like something was missing from me, a vital part of who I am." He leaned down to kiss her softly on the lips. "You are what keeps me strong, Baby Girl. I'm useless without you, as a profiler, and as a person."
Her heart swelled with love and a smile spread across her face, tears falling against her open lips. Wrapping her arms around his neck, she kissed him hungrily, proving with that touching of their lips just how much she loved him. It wasn't just her needing him or him needing her; they needed each other, just as much as they needed oxygen for their lungs.
When she broke apart, he said, "Your angel lips never cease to amaze me." He paused to kiss her again. "I love you, Baby Girl."
She took his hand and gave it a squeeze. "I love you, too." Leaning down to pick up her umbrella, she started leading him down the street, ignoring the stares of the people walking by them on the street. "Let's go home."
"Home could be this street for all I care, just as long as I'm with you, angel."