A/N: A Matt x Mello oneshot written to the lyrics of the song, "The Ocean," by the artist, Mae.
I Need You Here Tonight
He couldn't sleep.
Mello peered out into the utter darkness that cloaked the entirety of his bedroom, his bluish gaze possessing a sense of hurt and sorrow, his mind mesmerized in an ongoing series of flashbacks. He couldn't help, but remember. He found himself remembering those past thing he had thought he had forgotten, those childhood memories of the orphanage in England – those recollections that made smiles form on his lips. But, as always, nightmares trailed the favorable recollections, but even to those, he found himself smiling.
Why?
He remembered one particular individual – one person out of many he had acquainted with – that, always, was there. He had been like a brother, but so much more than just that, someone who was at his side when you least expected it to lighten the moment with a lighthearted joke, or just a smile.
This person was Matt.
Mello remembered when Matt would slip his hand in his and hold on forever, or kiss his cheek when nobody was watching them. He remembered how beautiful Matt always looked, even when clad in his typical black-and-white striped shirt and tattered jeans. He remembered his voice, deep, yet warm. He could remember how he always smelled of cigarettes and earth – the scent of a man.
Yes, all of these recollections poured into his mind.
Mello could remember Matt so completely, as if the man were alive.
Am I alone in this?
Never a night where I can sleep myself 'till day.
He sunk his head deep into the delicate down of his pillow and turned onto his back, carelessly letting wisps of his rich-blonde hair tickle his neck and jawline as they slithered by his ears. His blue eyes were fixed above him, on the ceiling – towards the Heavens, where Matt was.
He hadn't meant for Matt to die.
He hadn't expected for his plan to fail.
Why…Why did he have to oversee that one flaw?
That one damned flaw that cost Matt his life.
A noise of distress escaped him.
He blamed himself. He was the reason he died.
Nevertheless, he prayed that Matt forgave him.
Mello sighed. "God, please...I'm sorry."
We must try to figure it out, figure it out.
It won't be that easy.
We lost it somehow.
It was then when a thin path of light corrupted the darkness, when the door was pushed ajar and a silhouette appeared. Mello propped himself on his elbows and perplexity shadowed his pale complexion, but it was not long until joy and disbelief abruptly coursed through his system – although, it did not show on his face. The silhouette moved towards him, outstretching a black-gloved hand in his direction.
"Mello," it whispered his name.
The voice was instantly recognizable – it was deep, yet warm. Mello smiled and looked to the silhouette's eyes, finding a pair of orange-tinted goggles strapped over them.
Such a visage was unmistakable. He knew this man.
Mello whispered a name back, his voice low. "…Matt."
You come over unannounced.
Silence broken by your voice in the dark.
Mello slipped his hand in Matt's and shifted himself onto his feet, proceeding to step beyond the doorsill and into the hallway. All around them, the world seemed to blur and fade to nothing, and paradise unfolded. Their hands squeezed tighter as the world further dissipated to nothingness, becoming replaced by a shoreline – sand, the ocean, a warm breeze, the night sky, the full moon...
Mello was uncertain.
Was he dreaming?
The breeze washed over his bare legs and swept up his oversized tee-shirt. He caught Matt's scent of cigarettes and earth. He inhaled deeper.
It all seemed so real.
I need you here tonight,
Just like the ocean needs the waves.
Still clasping Matt's hand, Mello sat himself by the water. Again, he peered into the dusk of the night, listening to Matt take a seat at his side. For a moment, their hands let go, but Matt quickly encircled Mello's waistline with one tender arm. The blonde, subconsciously, laid his head by the crook of the other man's neck and, too, brought his arm about him, leaning into his frame deeply, sensing the warmth of his body radiate through the fabric of his clothes. The scent of the man grew stronger, and Mello desired to taste him, bringing his lips against his neck.
Matt's low laughter echoed in his ear – as if to prove that the situation was, in fact, real.
Oh, the night becomes the space that's somewhere in between,
What I feel and what I'm told.
Sitting on the shoreline trying to figure it out, figure it out.
To find out the meaning,
And reach it somehow.
Mello laid flat on his back, listening to Matt rustle in the sand as he heightened himself onto all fours, then straddled his friend's waistline. He flashed the blonde a playful, lopsided grin – one that could make any woman swoon. His hands slipped to the sides of his face, stroking such flawless skin and that adored mane of golden hair. As Matt leaned down, Mello wound his arms around the man's torso and outstretched himself beneath his lover, locking his bluish eyes with the other man's similarly-hued pair. Matt let his form fall lightly on top of Mello's, letting his inner thigh come in contact with his love's and his hips descend gently.
He gathered his lips in a kiss.
Their chests met and their hearts began to beat in sync – together, as one. Mello closed his eyes and awaited the moment, slipping his hand along the small of Matt's back, continuing until he could grasp a gentle fistful of his brunette hair. Matt, too, brought his own hand to the back of Mello's head and tenderly elevated it in his palm. He leaned down and pressed his lips against his soft mouth, sustaining the kiss to allow delectable, sweet flavors blossom on his tongue.
He was the first to moan.
Mello, softly, echoed.
Rain began to fall.
Fall around me now,
Like, stars that shine and brighten the way.
It felt as if a trace of Heaven had descended upon them both, dabbing a little sense of ecstasy – a little sense bliss that encircled them, and kept them bound in its divine clutches. Neither one of them wanted such impassion to depart.
The kiss grew deeper and more passionate with the accumulating rainfall. They soon became drenched in the cool precipitation, their forms shivering whenever a gentle gust of wind would wash over them. Mello called out in a moan, fluttering his eyelids to gaze up at Matt through rain-obscured vision. From behind his orange-tinted goggles, Matt's blue eyes upturned in a smile down at his love.
Mello embraced the man tighter.
He indulged himself in him.
Such bliss - it was intoxicating.
I need you here tonight,
Just like this night, it needs the rain.
Tasteless, untainted rainwater streaked his face and moistened Mello's lips. Matt kissed him harder, snaking in his tongue. Beneath the sound of the rain pattering dully against the sand – striking faintly against the ocean – the sounds of their moans struck the atmosphere. Matt felt himself conform on top of Mello's extended frame. They breathed together, moaned together, and their hearts thrummed in sync.
It was as if they were becoming one.
The season has changed.
The wind, it blows colder now,
Colder now.
With a noise of yearning, Matt took a gentle hold of Mello's shoulders and pulled him upright, situating his slender frame in his lap. Both men embraced and, not once, parted their lips. Matt, continuously, ran a tender hand through Mello's soaked, golden locks, pausing once every moment or so to cradle his jawline, or to stroke the side of his face. On an exhale, Mello brought his mouth to the crook of the other man's neck, fluttering his lips across the subtle arches of collarbones, and the rigid texture of his throat.
Matt forfeited with a prolonged moan. He slipped his hands up the back of Mello's shirt, stroking him as if attempting to suppress his ecstasy coursing through his system. He leaned his head back and breathed out, letting the rainwater further dampen his face and hair. Mello took advantage, and kissed Matt's elongated neck, murmuring indistinctly into his skin, rattling sensitive bones with his voice's deep moans.
Matt's eyes drooped. He whimpered, "M-Mello…"
The clouds are raised,
The rain, it falls harder now,
All around.
A rush of cool air washed over them both, and they shivered, embracing. Mello flung his arms about Matt's neck, and the latter encircled a slender waistline. He nuzzled his face close to Mello's cheek, kissing his ear before he murmured again, "Mello."
You come over unannounced.
Silence broken by your voice in the dark.
"Matt," Mello uttered back.
He started to lock their lips - to, again, taste the essence cigarettes and a little alcohol, and to inhale rich, earthy cologne.
But, when their mouths met, Mello could not sense him there.
He could not feel someone's warm breaths slipping into his mouth, or the presence of another tongue snaking against his own, or the simple sensation of the man's soft lips.
He felt as if he were kissing nothing, but atmosphere.
Air, dust, and nonexistence...
No longer did he feel strands of rain-drenched hair in his palm, or a secure pair of arms holding him.
It was as if Matt had evaporated from existence, had dissipated into thin air.
He had vanished.
I need you here tonight,
Just like the ocean needs the waves.
Mello glanced around him in a desperate pursuit to fix his eyes on his love's handsome face – to see him again - in desperation to know that Matt was doing nothing but playing some sick joke on him, just hiding…
But, he found no one.
Mello didn't bother to cry his name or call out into the obsidian, night sky. He found himself gazing up into the Heavens, again, and the paradise around him began to evaporate to nothingness.
The dusk setting of his bedroom returned.
The door had been shut, preventing any trace of light inside.
The darkness engulfed him.
Matt was gone.
Mello was alone.
Will you come over?
…I need you here tonight.
He lay back down, this time, on his side. He touched the spot on his cheek where Matt's gloved hand had touched him, the place where his jawline had been cradled, and the tiny spot where soft lips had pressed against his ear.
He licked his lips.
He tasted cigarettes.
I need you here tonight,
Just like the ocean needs the waves.
He closed his eyes.
His fist clutched.
"Matt…"
Just like the stars that fall around me now.
**********