Hi there! Lately I was pretty caught up in a new anime Shingeki no Kyojin. Never thought I'll like anime again. After a long-time break. But I'm really happy I did)) I really need to sleep now, but I had this sudden urge to write something for an EreMike week (I love this two, they're perfect). I know I'm late, but I really had no time to do it before... So here is my first fanfic for this anime that has a theme for EreMika fans out there)) And sorry for any mistakes, English is not my first language.
Heartbeat
In her not so long life of a soldier Mikasa never had time or wish to wonder if there was something human about this enormous giant monsters people called Titans. Something close to her own kind. Like emotions. Do they feel happy then they're getting their hands on some meal? Do they feel fear then her fellow soldiers come and cut their necks killing them? They do show their anger in a form of a loud roar that has nothing to do with a normal human speech and sounds more like an animalistic bellow, but is it really a true sign of a real emotion? Or it's something told by instincts? Do they even have ones? Or maybe they have some physical feels. Not only that all-time hunger that draws them to kill and eat humans like some greedy kids go for candies. Do they feel something like pain? Come to think about it, she never has seen any Titan with pained face, even then they were losing limbs or getting attacked from behind or squashed by other giants. They always were wearing this stupid smirks and smiles. Yes, they did have screams that sounded painful, but was it really they way of showing pain, or was it just a visible sign of them getting uncomfortable? Do they have... hearts? Hanji-san once told her that she had that one nasty experiment which involved piercing a giant's heart. She said it never shown any reaction to it. Scientist quickly come up with a theory that this Titan was simply too closed up to show any emotion at all, but Mikasa had doubts about it. Maybe it never had one to feel anything. After all, young soldier has been too close to giants too many times and she had never heard any sound like a heartbeat coming from them. Only that hard breathing, deep scary growls and terrible crunching sound of chewed up bones of her fallen comrades. No sounds like she was hearing now...
After a long rough fighting with Titans outside the Walls, being covered by her own blood with opened fresh wounds, spinning head and sprained ribs that hurt like hell she wasn't sure if that she was hearing wasn't an illusion brought up by her tired brain and wild fantasy.
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Even with his hard panting with some growls mixed in it and thuds on a ground deafening her Mikasa still could hear it. A heartbeat. Coming out of a wide muscled chest which she was cuddled in large hands against. Loud and strong enough to make her head hurt with a sound, but still somehow calming. Familiar. Just like that one time then she held him in her arms with face pressed against his chest while a white-hot steam was covering them from other's eyes. Making it their little moment.
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Just like that time. But back then it was her reassurance of him being alive, now it was her only sign of herself being still here, in this cruel, but beautiful world. Her own heartbeat in her ears is drowned by this loud thumbs of a Titan holding her, carrying her back to safety, running back to Walls then she can be saved and taken care of. Their comrades far behind riding horses at full speed to catch up with them. But Mikasa wasn't even thinking about it, all that was there in her head is his heartbeat echoing in ears and sending chills down her spine. All she feels is him holding her close to himself to keep her warm with his heat and steam pouring from a hard skin. She had lost a lot of blood and her pale skin was growing cold, but there was still some warmth left.
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White stone of the Wall Rose was seen in the horizon and Eren willed himself to run faster and harder. All just to not let Mikasa to disappear, not let her... He shuddered even at the thought of a word "die". In his clouded mind he still could see that last Reiner's attack. Armoured titan had swung his fist at him while Rouge titan was down on the ground after a powerful blow to back attempting to tear his head off and break his neck to take Eren out of a titan flash and finally capture him. But Mikasa had other plans. How stupid it was of her to jump in front of Rouge and take the blow on herself. He still could hear a sickening crunch in his ears and the sound of something flying to the side and landing with a loud thud on the ground. Then there was her broken figure lying in a glass with blood slowly forming a pool around her straining green cape and cowering wings on her back. After that there was nothing, but a blind rage and hatred in his heart and soul.
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This weak sound coming from her small figure in his large hands reached his pointed sensitive ears telling him she's still here, she's still alive. Still holding to last strains of life. She felt cold against his hot skin sending painful jolt through his big heart. One little hand pressed weakly on his muscle to balance herself, another one tugging at red blood-socked scarf around her neck. No sound coming out of her mouth. Only weak thumbs in a chest.
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There is Hanji-san standing on the edge of the Wall watching them approach and ready to shot down on her 3DMG to cut him out or to help with something. 'Just a little longer. Wait, Mikasa, soon enough you'll be alright. Soon you'll be safe.' She couldn't hear him, but this words said to himself were calming and a little helpful. But not for too long. Mikasa's hand slipped from his skin sanding a chill on it like a cold blade sliding on a flash. The sound in her chest almost silent to him now. Skin even paler than before. His thoughts started to confuse with each other, then panic caught up with him faster than any soldier back there. Mikasa fell completely limb in his hands, breathing slowing as fast as her tiny heartbeat. 'No! Don't you dare then we're this close...' Woman with glasses flew down fast, but not fast enough to catch up with a weak heart.
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And then there was silence.
A blinding light coming from everywhere was her first visitor in this hour, then her eyes slowly opened to a world around her. Everything was blurry and unfocused, but strangely warm. Like something was holding her weak almost unfamiliar body. Mikasa blinked once, twice. Walls around her come to focus along with a ceiling hanging far above her throbbing head. Wooden brown ceiling of the infirmary then she has been too many times visiting him. Seems like this time it's going to be reverse. At her weak attempt to smile her whole head started to hurt. Yes, along with her sight a blinding pain had returned. Unpleasant feeling that let young Oriental know, she was still alive. For a moment then her heart had stopped and she fell in a cold darkness Mikasa thought that was it. Her last moment. She won't be able to do anything anymore. No fighting with monsters, no training with solders and corporal, no protecting Eren... No hearing his heartbeat anymore. Speaking of him...
Ignoring the searing pain in her head she weakly turned to the side to look at the source of a warmth she was feeling on her hand. There he was. Half lying on her bed while holding her hand tightly in his own. Eyes closed, hair falling on his face, lips moving slightly letting out a soft snoring. Eren always looked peaceful then he was asleep. The only time she could watch him without being afraid to be scolded on. There were strange marks on his cheeks that looked like scars, but were healing slowly with a light almost invisible steam emanating from them. Mikasa wanted to touch him to be sure that it wasn't some cruel dream, to feel his hot skin to reassure herself she was truly here with him. Just as she moved to brush his drown hair slightly his emerald-green eyes opened and stared straight at her. A tiny little second of silence and then he was there hugging her carefully with his ear pressed against her chest and closed eyes full of tears.
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"Never ever do it again!" was all that he said while rubbing his head against her not getting enough of her smell, of feeling of her being in his arms, of her being alive. Her hands weakly raised to his hair and Mikasa hugged him back in a silent promise feeling as his racing heart beat fast and strong pressed against her stomach just like the time he was saving her few hours ago. 'Just as human, as he always was and always will be. No matter what.'
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