Buona sera, amici miei...OK, that's all the Italian I know...dang, I'm running out of cool Author's Notes! Anyone know how to say hi in any other languages?

Here we have another GMD one-shot. Here, little Danielle asks her father the BIG QUESTION. Hopefully this will be cute and adorable and full of d'awww. Enjoy!

LONDON 1883

"Daddy, can I ask you a question?"

Professor Ratigan peered over the newspaper he was reading to see his little daughter Danielle looking up at him with her inquisitive dark blue eyes. He grinned. "I don't know, Danielle, CAN you?" Being a former Oxford professor, he was a stickler for correct grammer, even from a four-year-old.

"Sorry, Daddy. MAY I ask you a question?"

"Of course, darling, ask me anything you like." Ratigan set the paper aside. It was nice to have free time, but his daughter meant more to him than anything else.

"Where do babies come from?" Danielle asked.

"Um..." Ratigan fumbled, trying to figure out how to explain it. He felt that usually it would be a mother's job to tell her children about where babies came from, but his beloved wife Mary had been dead for a few years now, so it was his job to explain things to her. "Um..."

Danielle blinked at her father. "It's OK if you don't know, Daddy. I can go ask Uncle Fidget."

"I KNOW! I'M NOT AN IDIOT!" Ratigan shot back, his pride getting the better of him. He calmed down a second later. "I'm just trying to figure out the best way to answer your question, that's all."

"Oh." Danielle was quiet. "So where DO babies come from?"

"Well, honey bunny, babies come from their mommies." There we go, he thought. Short and sweet. Hopefully she won't ask what that means.

"What does that mean?"

Of COURSE she asked that. She's YOUR daughter. "You see, it's like this; a baby starts out as a tiny little dot, even smaller than this." Ratigan held up his fingers to show how small. "Because it's not ready to be in the world when it's that small, the baby's mommy keeps it safe and warm inside her tummy until it's big enough and is ready to be born." He smiled. Hopefully THAT'LL keep her satisfied.

Danielle thought about what her father had just said. "But then where did I come from?"

"What do you mean? I just told you where babies come from."

"Yeah, but I don't HAVE a mommy," Danielle replied. "So where did I come from?"

Ratigan felt his stomach tense up a bit. He knew that sooner or later he would have to tell Danielle about her mother. He had just hoped that it could have been later. "The truth is, Danielle, you DID have a mommy, but she's not with us anymore."

"Where IS she?"

"Well, sweetie, when Mommy and I first got married, the doctor told her not to have any babies, because he was afraid it would hurt her. But because Mommy wanted a baby very, very much, she ignored the doctor's advice. And she had you in her tummy and she kept you very safe and healthy, but then when it was time for you to be born, she got very hurt and she...died." Ratigan began to cry. I can't believe it, he thought. It's been four years since Mary died and I STILL cry every time I tell that story. Then again, I suppose one never really gets over losing their true love.

Danielle looked sad. "So it's my fault Mommy's not here anymore?"

"No, no, not at all," Ratigan tried to comfort the little girl. He picked her up and put her on his lap. "Mommy wanted you here. That's why she was willing to get hurt and die to bring you here."

"Are YOU glad I'm here, Daddy?" Danielle asked.

"Very much so. I love you so much, my little princess."

"I love you, too, Daddy." The two hugged. "Daddy, may I ask you one more question?"

"Certainly, darling."

"How does a baby get INTO its mommy's tummy in the first place?"

Ratigan chuckled and patted her on the head. "I'll tell you about that when you're a little older."

Awww! Wait, does that last line count as Getting Crap Past the Radar? (sorry, it's my inner TV Troper screaming to get out!)

Oh man, now I'm trying to imagine Vincent Price actually HAVING this conversation with one of his children (he had at least two, just so you peeps know), and lemme tell you, it's pretty blippin' hilarious, if only because he plays so many evil/not nice characters that he seems to be one of the LAST people you would want to have this conversation with a kid, but in real life he was a big sweetheart so it might actually work out pretty well.

Thanks for reading, peeps! Abinaza! (for the seven of you out there who haven't seen The Princess and the Frog, that's Maldonian for bye-bye)

All my best, DiscordantPrincess.