"Hold On"
a songfic by Crys Ritter 2004
for my sister, on her birthday, January 21.
No copy write infringement intended. I don't own the characters of seaQuest DSV or the music of Good Charlotte, Pat Benetar, Everclear, 3 Doors Down and Suzy Flowers.
Depression is a black box there is only one escape from....
or so it seems.
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this world
this world is cold
but you don't
you don't have to go
you're feeling sad, you're feeling lonely
and no one seems to care
your mothers gone and your father hits you
this pain you cannot bear
but we all bleed the same way as you do
and we all have the same things to go through
Lucas...
I never ....
I never thought you were so cold and lonely.
I knew your family was distant, I knew there were secrets you couldn't share.
I wish I had told you ....
I wish I had shared my secrets, we had more in common than we knew.
When 'being good' means sitting so quiet
when 'being good' means you're always achieving
when 'being good' means being just like you
when 'being good' means never disagreeing
How many lose when one heart's in hiding?
how many lose when one heart wants to be dying?
how many lose when one heart stops trying?
Wounds of the Fathers
wounds of the Mothers
wounds of the Daughters and the Sons
visit all of us, visit everyone
How many lose when one heart is broken?
how many lose when our love's unspoken?
how many lose when one heart's forgotten?
You tried so hard to be everyone's everything,
"Such a good boy", they all said.
Too late, we can all say it now.
They cry in the dark, so you can't see their tears
They hide in the light, so you can't see their fears
Forgive and forget, all the while
Love and pain become one and the same
In the eyes of a wounded child
Because Hell
Hell Is For Children
And you know that their little lives can become such a mess
Hell
Hell Is For Children
And you shouldn't have to pay for your love with your bones and your flesh
It's all so confusing, this brutal abusing
Hell is for Hell
Hell is for Hell
Keeping the masks that we both wear....
Putting the past behind, try not to care.
Paying the ultimate price
pretending we don't care.
hold on if you feel like letting go
hold on it gets better than you know
the days, you say they're way too long
and your nights, you can't sleep at all
and you're not sure what you're waiting for but you don't want to no more
and you're not sure what you're looking for but you don't want to no more
Days that I felt I couldn't face ....
Days that you never came out of your room ....
Days that when we did, the circles nearly hid the eyes we fought to keep open.
I keep telling myself that someday it'll get better but I'm not sure when or how.
but we all bleed the same way as you do
and we all have the same things to go through
hold on if you feel like letting go
hold on it gets better than you know
don't stop looking you're one step closer
don't stop searching it's not over
hold on
Day by day, I keep on hoping ....
But now that you're gone I'm loosing hope ....
Then I see all that you could have been....
all that you might have done.
I have to hold on.
what are you looking for
what are you waiting for
do you know what you're doing to me
I missed the signs, I didn't see what you had going on.
You waited and I didn't show ....
I didn't show how much I cared.
I wish I could be like all my heroes
I wish I could be like all yours too
I don't wanna be wasted
No, I don't wanna live inside of this daydream anymore
I just wanna be happy again
I don't wanna be wasted, I don't wanna be
I don't wanna be wasted, I don't wanna be
I don't wanna be wasted, I don't wanna be blind
No, I don't want to be blind
No, I don't want to be blind
I wish I hadn't been deaf, hadn't been blind....
If I hadn't stayed mute,
You'd not have gone and left me behind.
There's another world inside of me
That you may never see
There's secrets in this life
That I can't hide
Somewhere in this darkness
There's a light that I can't find
Maybe it's too far away...
Maybe I'm just blind...
Maybe I'm just blind...
Maybe ....
Just maybe if I could open up
Let the light shine, show them what's inside
It won't be too late for me.
So hold me when I'm here
Love me when I'm wrong
Hold me when I'm scared
And love me when I'm gone
Everything I am
And everything you need
I'll also be the one
You wanted me to be
I'll never let you down
Even if I could
I'd give up everything
If only for your good
I'd do it right now, if only you'd come back to me ....
I won't tell you a damn thing
That I could not tell my friends
Roaming through this darkness
I'm alive but I'm alone
Part of me is fighting this
But part of me is gone
I don't afraid to go
but I don't think I can stay now.
When hero's fall, in love or war
They live forever
When your dreams won't come true
Can you hear this prayer
'Coz someone's there for you
This is a song
A song for the lonely
And that's not you only
Through the darkest night
You're gonna see the light
Only you could make me hurt so bad ....
only you could give me such great hope.
So lonely inside
So busy out there
And all you wanted
was somebody who cares
Your hand is all I have to keep me hanging on
Looking back, I can look forward now.
GO AHEAD
what are you waiting for
hold on if you feel like letting go
hold on it gets better than you know
don't stop looking, you're one step closer
don't stop searching, it's not over...hold on
Wait for me, please wait on me ....
Don't let go ....
Please don't go ....
We were closer than you know ....
I have to hold on,
even though you're gone ....
I'll always miss you.
Look into the future
What do you see
I really need to know now
Is there a place for me
And tell me, where do we go from here
Take me as you find me
For what I am
And when I make mistakes
Please understand
And as long as I know you're near
There is nothing for me to fear
Out of the darkness
A light shines
Burning through the coldest night
And we can find our way (Together we'll make it)
With every step we take (Moving closer together)
If we're gonna survive
The dream must stay alive
Baby, will you hold me, when I'm afraid
See me through the danger, 'til the break of day
If there's love, there's a chance for me
Just believe in yourself, you'll see
HOLD ON HOLD ON HOLD ON HOLD ON HOLD ON HOLD ON HOLD ON HOLD ON