Happy Birthday, Dr. House…
House's bright blue eyes popped open like a pair of jack-in-the-boxes. Today was one of his ducklings' birthdays, but he couldn't remember which. Or should he say, he'd gotten too drunk last night to remember which.
"Hmmmm…" House moaned, turning onto his right side. An arm draped over his side. He turned his head to see brown eyes looking at him.
"Turn around. This is insanely uncomfortable." Jimmy said.
"Piss off." House said.
"Turn around, you butt, so I can kiss you."
House liked the thought of that, so he turned toward the left.
"Hey." he said groggily.
"Good morning, love." Wilson said.
House sighed. Sometimes Wilson forgot he was the girl, and not House..
"Good morning Dr. Wilson." House said crisply.
Wilson kissed the scowl right off his face. House's lips opened tenderly to accommodate Wilson's seeking tongue. They kissed hungrily, then broke it off.
"I'd better go make pancakes." Wilson said.
"Oohh, then you'll taste like macadamia!" House said. "Yay!"
Wilson smiled indulgently as he walked to the kitchen. Ever since House and himself had started sleeping together three months ago, it was like the kinder, gentler House. Still a pain in the tush, but eh, what can you do? I sound more like my Mom every day, Wilson thought. Maybe I am the girl.
House started thinking. Should he ask Wilson whose birthday it was? God, no, maybe it was Wilson's. And as Wilson's property, (it was true, House had the stamp on his ass to prove it!), Wilson would kill him.
The other ducklings? Nah, they'd get offended and start bitching, and then he wouldn't get a moment's peace the whole day.
What about Cuddy? Maybe. She'd just make fun of him, tell him, and move on. Cuddy had possibilities. He could handle her wit.
House had seen a drawing the other day, probably by the ducklings, maybe not. His diagnostic genius, choice of cases, and smashing good looks had made him world known. The drawing, something along the lines of a personal ad with his face on it, had nailed him perfectly, everything from his age, to the medical career, limp, monster trucks, and motorbikes. His favorite part had been something along the lines of "likes to eviscerate lesser mortals with blistering wit." So true. House smiled. How did people know him so well?
House decided he'd ask Cuddy. Besides, he'd get to see how much cleavage she was showing today. Big bonus.
He was about to get up when the cell phone beside his bed rang.
"'Lo?"
Three voices on the line hurt his ears. "Happy Birthday!"
"Shuddup," House said, and hung up the phone. Why were the ducklings calling him to wish one of them a happy birthday? He didn't do that, plus it was a waste of phone minutes Wilson paid for. 'Twas annoying.
House slid his legs off the bed and called for Wilson
"Hon, where'd you put my cane last night?" House smiled. He was becoming positively TAME!
"I'll get it, House." Wilson said.
Wilson came into the room, twirling House's 'kickass' cane and doing Rockette kicks. House smiled and snickered.
"See, you are the girl!" House said.
Wilson stopped, came very near, and whispered in House's ear, "I don't care. I love you." House smiled, stopped Wilson from leaving, and whispered, "I know. Me too."
Mornings were the always the worst. There were times when he'd consider overdosing on Vicodin again. But Wilson was always there to pull him back.
Let me help you into the shower," Wilson said.
"No, I can do it."
"For crissake, House, I sleep with you on a daily basis. I do things I've never done nor ever would do every night. I've told you I love you even when all you have to say is 'piss off.' Don't you think I deserve to see you at your worst? Haven't I already? For two days last year I paced the floor and barely slept because I was so afraid for you. LET ME HELP YOU!"
House grimaced. The pain was too much to hide. Wilson was there, always there.
"Look at me." Wilson said. "Look at me and tell me you don't want my help, that you don't hurt. Then I'll just walk away like I always do, and you can come after me, like you always do, and nearly get hurt, like you always do, and we can make peace."
For some reason, during these fights they had on a regular basis, House always heard some teen pop songstress' lyrics. Today it was Miranda Cosgrove's "About You Now."
"I don' t have the energy for that today. Yes, I hurt. Yes, I need your help. Aw, hell, I always need your help. You're always there, whether I want you or not. I'm about to say something I never want circulated- I'm sorry."
Wilson's brown eyes smiled. "I'll never tell."
"Thank you, Wilson."
Wilson has stripped off House's clothes and is walking him to the shower.
"Coming in with me? House asked.
"Meow…"