Author's Note: I guess that this is really over done but I'm being a Jacob/Bella fan right now. But Edward/Bella fans, don't worry, I love them as a couple too, I have things that hide up my sleeves on the darkest of nights.
Disclaimer: I don't own any of the rights to Twilight, Midnight Sun, New Moon, and Eclipse, Breaking Dawn or anything to come. Many of the characters are created by Stephanie Meyer except for the few that will come up along the way. Also, the first bit that is written in italics was written by Stephanie Meyer and I only added it to set the mood.
He released me, lifting his other hand to brush his fingertips along my cheek, trailing them down to my jaw. I could feel his fingers tremble-not with anger this time. He pressed his palm against my cheek, so that my face was trapped between his burning hands.
"Bella," he whispered.
I was frozen.
No! I hadn't made this decision yet. I didn't know if I could do this, and now I was out of time to think. But I would have been a fool if I thought rejecting him now would have no consequences.
I stared back at him. He was not my Jacob, but he could be. His face was familiar and beloved. In so many real ways, I did love him. He was my comfort, my safe harbor. Right now, I could choose to have him belong to me.
Maybe it would be easy-like holding his hand or having his arms around me. Maybe it would feel nice. Maybe it wouldn't feel like a betrayal. Besides, who was I betraying anyway? Just myself.
Keeping his eyes on mine, Jacob began to bend his face toward me. And I was still absolutely undecided.
As his nose brushed against mine I realized that Edward was never coming back. His lips met mine, lightly at first, but as soon as he realized that I wasn't fighting it he put more passion into the kiss. His hands moved from my cheeks as our lips began to move rhythmically as one, one found its way to the back of my neck; the other rested itself on my lower back. Jacob's burning lips parted mine and our tongues slid together and apart. So many boundaries that I had known before didn't matter now, standing on tip-toe my arms wrapped themselves around his neck, one hand running through his hair.
He stopped, briefly to mutter something that sounded like, "persistence does pay off," Before returning to the kiss with more enthusiasm than before. After a few moments we both found ourselves out of breath.
He was grinning, as if he had won something, in many ways I guess he had. I blushed sheepishly, although I had no real reason to yet finally the constant throbbing in my heart had subsided and was replaced by a pleasant burning sensation. This kissing was more daring than any of Edward's.
It hurt less to think the name now.
We stood there in silence for a little while until we heard the cruiser pull up. Charlie walked in silent and sorrowful, I had almost forgotten about Harry.
"I should get going," Jake whispered to me, I almost protested but I knew that he needed to be there for Billy and I should be there for Charlie, "I'll see you later," he promised me.
When was later? I asked myself.
Charlie placed himself on the couch, turning on the television, but I could tell that he wasn't watching sports as Jacob gave me a goodbye kiss before turning to leave. I let out a small sigh, closing the door with both hands and turning towards Charlie ready to console him.
"Oh dad, I'm so sorry about Harry," I said, sorrowfully as I rushed to the couch and pulled him into an embrace. I had told him that many times before, but I knew that after the funeral he needed to hear it again. He wrapped his arm tightly around me, dry sobbing, afraid to let the real tears come. I held him like that for a few minutes muttering reassuring words here and there before he pulled away, catching his breath.
"So," he croaked out, "are you and Jake finally together?"
I thought, for a moment, were we together? "Yeah. Yeah I guess we are."
As soon as I said those words Charlie's face brightened, "Oh Bella I'm so happy for you."
As soon as those words were out of his mouth, the phone rang. I got up from my perch on the couch and went to answer it with a calm, "Hello?"
"Bella," the velvet voice purred through the phone, my stomach dropped.
"Edward?" I choked out, but he had already hung up. The gap started to rip itself open.
"It's been a long day," I muttered to Charlie, "I'm going to bed."
"Okay goodnight, Bells."
Things felt different, but familiarly different as I pushed open the door to my room. Like my room had dropped several degrees in temperature, back to the way it used to be before global warming had occurred in my room when my sun started coming around, and suddenly I knew he was there. My eyes avoided the corner where I knew his perfect body stood, motionless. I got ready as calm as I could and slipped into bed, still avoiding him, my eyes never met any part of him once, and surprisingly enough, I fell asleep. I just wanted to wake up screaming, the nightmares didn't come that night, but I knew what nightmare awaited me waking up.
The next morning I woke up to a cool hand tracing my facial features and Edward's once topaz eyes, now blackened with thirst, looking at me. I barely managed to groan out a, "Stop." My voice thick with sleep and desperation to keep hold of what little bit of my heart that still beat.
"Why? You have no idea the relief I'm feeling in the fact that you're still alive," And with those words I knew Alice must've seen me jump off the cliff.
"You can hear my heart beating, therefore, you can leave," I muttered angrily.
"But I don't want to go, I want to stay here with you, Bella, I can't take it anymore, I can't be away from you, I love you, I can't stand trying to pull through a single hour without you, I can't stand being a zombie anymore, it's not the right kind of monster for me to be living my life as," He whispered, sincerely but still trying to pull off a joke, pulling my face towards his as if to kiss me.
The words made the hole in my heart rip open even further but I knew how I could continue to heal, I couldn't let this nightmare continue on, I had to banish my Romeo.
I twisted my face so that his lips met my cheek, the words he'd used on me months before burned on their way out, "I'll always love you…in a way, but I've moved on."
As clear as if the hallucination was back he murmured his last words into my ear, "Be happy Bella."
"A clean break," I used more of the words that he'd said to me and the tears shimmered their way down my cheek as he slipped himself out my window for the first time in a long time and the last time in my life.
I sighed and let the lethargy overtake me into sleep again until another pair of hands brought me into consciousness, the fire that melted the remainder of ice on my skin.
"Jake?" My hands searched for him, followed my eyes and finally my lips.
"Was it bad Bells?" He asked quietly, a bottle of Lysol in his hand that he continuously sprayed wherever Edward had touched, which was quite a lot. The horrid smelling mist filled the room until all that came out of the bottle was air.
"Not incredibly, it wasn't a party or anything though," I tried to keep my mood light which was easy, unsurprisingly.
"What did he want?" Jacob tensed himself, trying not to let the tremors move past his hands.
"To check on me, to see if I'd take him back," I stood on tiptoe in order to touch my hand to Jake's face to get him to look me in the eyes.
"And what did you tell him?" He braced himself for any answer that would come, I knew that this could make or break his heart.
"That I'd moved on," I'd already said this to Edward, but to say it to Jacob was better, so that he could know how I felt.
"Oh really?" Jacob's voice was joking now, as he lightly grew a big ego, "What is this lucky guy like? It's that joke Mike isn't it?"
"Not really, he understands me better than Mike does. And he's good looking, but only in a way," I put my head down hiding my flushed cheeks.
In a brief moment Jacob's eyes were in front my face, "Don't do that," he muttered, touching he lips lightly to where the blood pulsed under my skin. A tingle flew to my stomach where the dormant butterflies began to beat at my insides once again, I tilted my head up further to force my mouth onto his.
"Do what?" I barely managed to ask, breathing against his lips.
"Hide your face," He muttered, pulling me off the ground in his arms.
I pulled myself back to look at his face once more, I lightly traced the dark circles under his eyes that were even more prominent than the day before, "Jake you need to rest. You've been doing too much running."
He shook his head, oh defiant Jacob, "I can't rest with that bloodsucker still out there, I can't have her getting close to you, especially now, you're my life now,"
A tiny shock pulled at the rip in my heart. I'd already heard those words before, these mythical creatures needed to stop sharing their romantic lines. Before I could let the tears build up I focused my attention to Jacob's face, I'd cried too much these days.
"You can rest though, I'm still exhausted myself, nightmares have been keeping me up at night lately, would you mind sleeping with me for a little?" Jacob's eyes searched mine to make sure that there was no hidden sexual meaning behind those words. I admit, on any other day there might be but the words I spoke were so true that he picked me up and placed me in my bed before crawling in next to me.
I was surprised that we didn't fall through the floor as Jake's feet hung completely off my bed before he wrapped his arm protectively around me, like a small child's favorite teddy bear, and closed his eyes, the light snores came almost too soon afterwards.
It was a different kind of lullaby than I was used to, but a lullaby to me all the same and it assisted into pushing me into sleep where the nightmares were locked up for once and a pleasant dream came all on its own, probably with the help of Jacob.
I dreamed of a time without vampires on my trail, where it could just be me and Jake, happy, with two little kids running amuck, completely ungraceful a trait from both parents, a mix of Charlie, Renee, Billy and The Pack with bonfires at the beach and small shacked houses flowed through my head as my heart was finally happy.
But of course that happiness couldn't stay, no, not for me, Bella Swan, danger magnet.
The room grew cold once more and Jake awoke with a start his nose flared to face the danger at hand.
Yay! First chapter done! Sorry about the cliffy but I think ending at 11:11 is gonna be good luck for this story. Review please? I respect all criticism.