What Hurts The Most.
I can take the rain on the roof
of this empty house.
that dont bother me.
I can take a few tears now and then
and just let em out.
I was crying. Again. It had been months since Eli was stabbed and died.
but I just cant get over it.
Im not afraid to cry every once in a while.
even though going on with you gone,
still upsets me.
He just couldn't end the stupid fued. And look what happened.
I couldn't help but feel partially responible.
If I just confessed about the stink bomb.
If I didnt go to the dance with Fitz.,
Fitz.
Just hearing his name.
Even thinking his name makes me cringe.
He stabbed Eli.
there are days every now and again I pretend
Im okay.
But thats not what gets me.
I've hung out with Alli.
but it doesnt do any good.
But she's comforted me through it.
Its hard to deal with the pain of losing you everywhere I go.
But Im doing it.
Its hard to force that smile when I see our old friends
and Im alone.
I've become a lot more distant.
With everything.
Everyone.
Alli.
Adam.
My Parents.
Darcy.
still harder getting up
getting dressed
living with this regret
I dont really go anywhere anymore.
Just hide out in my room.
Thinking of him.
Regreting my choices.
Wondering what would've happened if he wasn't stabbed.
But I know If I could do it over
I would trade
give away
All the words that I say in my heart
that I left unspoken
Its hard dealing with someone you love dying.
yes love.
I did love Eli.
I wish I could've told him that, before he..
before he...
I started sobbing again.
What hurts the most.
was being so close.
Having so much to say
watching you walk away.
never knowing what couldve been
and not seeing that loving you is what i was
trying to do.
I miss him.
so much
He was such a great friend.
He helped me deal with my parents.
Broke me out of my shell.
Told me I was beautiful.
I miss his sarcasm.
His smirk.
His gorgeous green eyes.
I miss him.
not seeing that loving you. is what i was trying to do.
Im baaaack!
Sorry! My comp broke.): got a new one!
My internet went down and I was home sick so i figured.
hey, i havent written anything for a while. why not?
well I dont completely hate it.
I know it came out late after the (My interpretation of All falls down p2)
BUUUUUUT in my defense I didnt want to do one. ;D
But I heard the song and was like
"Holy freaking crap!" so yeah!
Hope you likeedddd~ Raina