AN: Hey guys. This idea just came in my head out of nowhere. It's just one of those things that just needed to get out into the universe. It might my OCC or not, it was just a bunch of fun to write. I also like the Cookie/Hakeem relationship so there's that. Enjoy! I don't own them because if I did Malcolm would still be on the show. :) Enjoy.
These broads aint about nothin'
Don't call me, no text, no discussion.
They all phony and that's why I don't truss em
They all phony and that's why I don't truss em
"That's hot shit right!" Hakeem exclaimed taking a long pull from the bong in front of him.
"It's dope keem. This is a straight up number one banger bet!" Chicken laughed drinking from the bottle of Hennessey like it was apple juice.
"It's definitely gonna knock Jamal's corny ass song off the charts." Drew chimed it.
Hakeem frowned thinking about Jamal and their last interaction, it was in no way pleasant, still he didn't want to see his brother fail.
"Man chill. There's room for both of us."
"Your mom and dad don't think so." Chicken laughed.
"What mom? Haven't you heard my song?" Hakeem angrily picked the bong up and took another pull, the smoke got caught in his throat and he started coughing heavily.
"Man, FUCK Cookie."
They all laughed except Hakeem.
"I'm serious. Fuck Cookie, Fuck Tiana all them bitches that fucked me over. Fuck. Them." Hakeem spat out and reached for his glass of E&J.
"Man why you so mad? You act like you don't have mad girls clockin you? And you pressed over Tiana? Pussy whipped nigga." Drew laughed.
"I'm not pussy whipped. I just…" He stopped. He didn't know why he was so upset. Sure he liked Tiana but he did have Camilla his anger was misplaced and God only knows why.
"Whatever." He finished with a scoff, there was a loud knock on the door that could be heard over the music that was already being played obscenely loud.
"Man who is it? Chicken get the door."
"Nigga, I aint your assistant."
"Then you can unassist your ass away from my liquor and my weed."
Chicken pursed her lips.
"Fine."
Another loud knock.
"I'm coming, I'm coming. Damn, what the fu-" Chicken couldn't get the rest of the words out when she opened the door to a half-smirked Cookie Lyon resting on the frame.
"Oh. Uh. Hi ," she whispered quietly, "Hakeem it's your mama!" Stepping to the side to allow Cookie to pass, Chicken quickly snickered behind her back as Hakeems eyes widened before he smirked at Cookie.
"I don't have a mama."
"Funny, I don't have a fake ass wannabe gangsta son yet here you are?"
The room was silent before Chicken and the two others burst out into hysterical laugher.
"Ha. Ha. Ha. What do you want Cookie?" Hakeem didn't bother with eye contact he just took the lighter to light another hit.
"I wanted to talk to you. " She glanced around the room at all the prying eyes. "Alone."
"There's nothing you can't say to me that my crew can't here. They can stay."
"Fine have it your way." She walked closer to where Hakeem was sprawled on his loveseat. "Excuse me." She politely gestured for Drew to get up from his seat on the armchair. He mumbled a soft sorry before grabbing his bowl and bottle of beer.
"This gonna take long cuz we kinda busy?"
Cookie smiled and looked around. "I see." She picked up the bottle of Hennessey and poured herself a glass before taking a sip and leaning back. "At least you have good taste in something."
"Look Cookie, if all you're gonna do is come and insult me you can go."
"Quite the contrary. I want to help you."
"How?"
"Scrap this dumb ass "Can't Truss Em" song."
"No."
"You think it's cute? Going around talking about how much you hate women when most of the people shaking their ass to your music is women? You think grown ass men wanna listen to a little fake ass gangsta rap about how his girlfriend has a side piece and his mama wasn't around?"
"The people will listen to anything I make. I'm a star."
"You wanna be appealing, be real."
"This is REAL. I don't like you. I don't like Tiana."
She cringed a bit before leaning forward.
"Then talk about that Hakeem. Talk about your anger, rap about what matters. That's what they can relate to."
"I am relatable."
"Really. You think people can relate to an entitled rich boy that never had to work for a thing a day in his life? I mean you're even lazy when it comes to your weed." She laughed gesturing to his bong.
"What?"
Cookie shook her head, thinking for a moment.
"Where is it?"
"Where's what?"
"The weed? Pot? Mary J? Ganja? You know what I'm talking bout boy." She held her hand out.
"I'm not giving you my weed."
She nodded. "Okay." She turned in her seat to address one of her uninvited spectators. "Which one of you wants an easy $100 dollars." Cookie smirked digging into her purse to pull out a crumbled $100 bill.
Curtis shot up.
"Here you go!" He handed her a tiny zip lock baggie, she opened it up to smell it.
"Thank you baby." She smiled back. "One of ya'll got a grinder?"
Chicken pulled something out of her back pocket. "This right?"
Cookie looked at the circular metal tin. "Yep. Give it here."
"And I know one of yall got a cigarillo or something." Drew pulled one from his pocket handing it over to Cookie.
"Great. Today's lessons for all my wannabes in how to properly roll a blunt."
"You can't be serious." Hakeem sighed staring at her in disbelief.
"Holy shit!" Drew exclaimed and pulled up a seat near Cookie.
"Can you back up?" Chicken laughed as she and Curtis walked over.
"See the way your little," she looked Drew up and down, "big friend over here is acting proves my point."
"Which is?"
She took the bag an pinched a bit of the weed carefully out of the bag and into the grinder and began twisting the top. "You're lazy. You are privileged and wouldn't know hard work if it stabbed you. You see Hakeem you pretend, and you do quite a good job of it, but they can tell. I told you once you don't need to rap like you from the streets because you not. Your daddy and me? We are."
They all watched as Cookie carefully emptied the cigarillo and dumped the contents on the table, she dumped the contents of the grinder into the now empty shell.
"See the way you should make your music is similar to the way I'm rolling this right here. Careful. Precise. Purposeful." She looked up at Hakeem while she rolled the blunt to damn near perfection. Showing it off from them to see before licking and sealing it. She took the lighter from the table and lit the tip pulling from it deeply and exhaling it out of her nose before sucking the smoke back into her mouth and out again.
They all leaned in close waiting for her to pass it and Cookie laughed, taking another small pull.
"Ya'll think I'm sharing? I did this."
"But you used our stuff." Curtis said defensively.
"Because you gave it to me and now I own it and made something else."
Hakeem followed her every word. Damn. She was good. Using the weed as a metaphor for his music. The different people that go into making a hit song the producer, songwriters, and instrumentation they all want a piece (and rightfully so) but it's up to the artist that has the final say that makes it their own. Cookie was trying to encourage him to be his own.
Cookie and Hakeem exchanged looks, an unspoken understanding.
I'm glad you got it. Her expression read.
"Well. As much fun as you guys have been I have a full schedule ahead of me and I don't want to delay you're little day party any longer." She stood up blunt still in her hand and walked toward to door.
"You gonna smoke that by yourself?" Drew spoke up.
"Absolutely not." She scoffed and put it out on the coffee table by the door and tossed it out the window nearby. Their faces were priceless.
"Hakeem." She nodded putting her sunglasses back on, dismissing herself from his apartment with a soft closing of the door.
She stood by the door just a little while longer to hear their reactions.
"OH MY GOD. Hakeem, no disrespect but Cookie is going down in my books as top MILF of all time. FUCK!" Drew exhaled.
"Bro is that a boner?" Chicken laughed.
Hakeem shoved his foot against Drew's calf and he hissed in pain.
"Yo, watch your fucking mouth that's my mama."
"I thought you didn't have a mama?" Chicken teased.
Initially cringing at Drew's comment Cookie walked away with a smile when she heard the word mama escape Hakeem's lips.
"Progress."