I was listening to Beauty and Pain by Superchick, and with an idea from one of my reviewers for Unbeautiful this one was born.
I ran down the dark road, the moon was my only guide to his home.
I don't know what that song did to me but it light some fire. I had to figure out why he left me. Why he walked out that door? I didn't want to move on only knowing was sweet memories and a divorce paper with both our signatures.
I'm not going to settle for an empty world. I didn't want to live here in the darkness without knowing the reason why I got here. If I were to move on I needed to know the reason. And the only person who knew that was Yusei.
I made it to the border of the Satellite and New Domino. I heard he had bought an apartment here. So he could see his friends in the Satellite but still make it to tournaments on time.
It was a smart move, but it seemed everything he did was smart. It was weird how he could pick choices the smartest choices yet be risky. But it was the one thing you have to love about him.
It seemed also if he believed in you, then you could believe in yourself and then everything fell into place. Like nothing could go wrong, no one can hurt you with their witty words or sharp blows, and that the world was at peace.
I made a couple of turns and stopped. In front of me was a complex with dark blue numbered doors and glass sliding doors in front of the building. It wasn't as fancy as New Domino but it wasn't as shabby as Satellite. The roof was a dark brown and the railing on the second floor was painted black. It reminded me of the colors Yusei wore.
The owner was a kind man who helped both Satellite's and to kind New Domino's. He never got caught because he was on the border, snobby New Dominos couldn't stand being even close to the Satellite so they made the border off limits, with a few exceptions for Luna and Leo, no one has broke it.
I was about to take a step forward when thoughts started floating in my head, bringing fear with them.
What if he did have an affair? What if he didn't want to see me? What if he laughed at me? What would he say?
Fear pulsed through my veins but I shook my head of those thoughts.
Yusei was to kind hearted to do that. I'm not going to live in fear for the rest of my life and I'm not going get out of here
I walked down the path. Every step closer the walk felt longer. I could just see Yusei, at the door. I pushed my legs to run faster and harder.
I almost made it to him, just arm's reach away. I reached my arms out but he disappeared behind the black doors.
I fell to the ground with a thump, my head pounded at the contact with the sidewalk. I looked at the doors that swallowed him up before my eyes closed and I was succumbed to the over powering darkness.
My eyes fluttered open, my mascara eyelashes brushed on my skin.
Great now I have mascara all over my face. Doesn't anyone know how hard it is to scarp mascara off.
My vision was a white haze. After blinking a few times I could make out my surroundings. I was on a tan couch with a black blanket covering my body.
The carpet was a dark navy blue, the walls a pearl white. I turned my head and a light brown hotel office style desk in the corner with a shelf with slots and dangling from the edges of the slots.
"Your up." I looked to the front of me and there was an old man. He was short and skinny. He had white short hair, that defied gratify and stood straight up.
His skin folded on the bones and muscle, showing his old age. He had onyx eyes, that glowed with mischief. My head then pounded, a sharp pain shocked my body and automatically I grabbed my head.
"My head." I was then handed an Advil and water, which I gladly accepted. I swallowed the pill and took a sip, and gave the water back to the old man.
"You had a pretty bad fall there." Fall, what was he talking about?
"What happened to me?" I asked in a hoarse voice. The old man handed me the water. The water slid down the sides, hydrating and cooling my throat.
"You fainted." Okay so that dream I had of Yusei was a dream. I need to see my doctor and ask him to see if my powers didn't put any holes in my brain.
"Can you do me a favor?" I asked the old man.
"Your looking for Yusei aren't you Akiza." I looked at the man in disbelief. How did he know my name? At least I knew Yusei was here.
"How do you know my name?" I had to know. When you have some random old man ask you if your looking for your ex husband and knows your name than something is wrong here.
"Yusei came to my hotel about 4 months ago. He looked upset about something. Later in the month he came home from a duel and he told me about you and the divorce. He's outside in the yard. You guys need some talking to do." I ran out the door looking for Yusei.
I found him lying in the grass, looking at the stars like we used to.
He still looked as sexy as ever. He traded his jacket for a grey vest that showed his perfectly toned biceps. He still had the same undershirt that hinted he had a six pack and his legs were shown off in his black jeans.
Why did he have to be so sexy and I was just a woman who had an unusual hair color. I'm surprised that he stayed with me looking that good. And the worst part about it is he didn't even notice all the looks woman gave him. Though he didn't notice other woman so I guess it all works out.
Why did he make me happy? Every time I looked at him my heart would be harder to the point I thought it would rip out of my chest.
My breath would catch in my throat that I would have to suck in big gulps of air to get my face back to it's normal shade. Love worked in mysterious ways.
I walked up to him my foot steps muffled by the damp sweet smelling grass. I sat beside him pulling my knees to my chest, my dress going a little past my ankles.
He looked at me, telling me that he acknowledged me, then he turned his head back to the stars.
"We need to talk, don't we?"
"Wasn't that perfectly clear when you left me in the middle of the night, y leaving divorce papers on the counter." He chuckled at my sarcasm and then it was quiet expect for the rambling of the talk show host on the radio.
"Don't you remember nights like these. Where we would look at the stars and make our own constellations. How I would lie in your arms and I would listen to your heart beat."
"Yeah, those nights were so rare I usually brought a picnic and red wine. We would eat the whole thing." I laughed. There was never a crumb of food left.
"What can I say, your cooking is out of this world." We both laughed at my comment.
"So was your cooking. I loved how when you made breakfast we always had strawberries and bananas."
It was true. I loved strawberries and he loved bananas. Anytime I made French toast I would stack it with them with strawberry syrup. We could never get rid of the stupid flies.
He would be the first one to finish it all. The funny part was that I had red hair and he had blonde streaks. What can I say, bananas and strawberries are made for each other.
"If I remember correctly you're the one who would grab the plate out of my hand and gobble down the thing in five seconds flat."
"What can I say, your cooking is too damn good." He turned to look at me with those cobalt blue eyes. They shined with happiness. I wanted to just snuggle in his chest and forget the world.
How could we do this? It's like we never got divorced. Like he never left in the middle of the night taking my heart with me.
I became quiet and turned my head away so I didn't have to see the spark in his eyes fade away. I couldn't take this.
Would he do the same thing? Raise my spirits up and then let me fall back to the lifeless darkness. To the suffering depression, where I didn't even know who I was.
"Why did you leave? I need to know." He grabbed my chin and made me look at him. His eyes had that same determination. That determination to save me.
"Look at me. It wasn't an affair. I couldn't stand looking at another woman than you. Your beautiful and perfect in every way, despite your past. It was me." I felt a tear fall down my eyes.
I wanted to scream he was lying. I wanted to scream than what other reason would he have to divorce me. I'm not perfect. I never was. I'm not beautiful. I wasn't like those super models that he goes to press conferences with. I'm not. How come he didn't understand that?
"Why then. Why divorce me after things were going so well? Why hurt me like that? Do you know how horrible it was for me when you were gone. I couldn't sleep without seeing your face. I couldn't eat, all I could do is cry and look at our picture. I lost myself when you left. My heart broke into tiny pieces and they flew away with the wind."
"I lost you that day. I lost me. I don't know who I am anymore. I'm scared I'll hurt some one else. I'm scared I'll hurt you. I'm scared that I'll never get out of this stupid depression. And here we are talking as if were still married. I don't know what to do any more. I need you. But I fear that I can't trust you anymore. The one person I trust is using me for his own gain. The second person said he loved me than left. Who in this cursed world am I supposed to trust? Who?"
The tears fell faster. I couldn't stop them. I knew my mascara was smearing on my face but that was the least of my worries.
I watched as he stroked the tears with my his calloused thumb. I guess working so hard with mechanical parts scared his hands.
I closed my eyes and enjoyed his hand holding, caressing my cheek.
"Aki, listen to me. I know I hurt you. I know broke your heart but I had been through the same thing. Knowing that I was hurting you, breaking your fragile trust. During my duels I just wanted to see you there cheering me. I love it when your cooking you hum the song stuck in you head, wearing that cute apron of yours. I love how you dance when the radio is on and your doing the laundry. I love it when you kiss me. I love you, Aki and that will never change."
"I left because of me. Jack told me that there are new dark signers and they are threatening to bring some one stronger than the King of the Underworld. I was scared. I didn't want them to figure out were married and use you to get to me. So I got the papers quickly and signed them and left. I didn't want you to know. I thought I could move on but I couldn't. Falling asleep became harder because you weren't there. I got so used to you falling asleep with me that once you left I had to take sleeping pills just to get to sleep. I can't live with out you and I'm not willing to try again."
Then he leaned close. I thought he was going to kiss me so I closed my eyes and relaxed. Instead I felt a light, slightly wet sensation on my forehead.
"We have two request from a John. The first song is I'm Sorry by Tommy Reeve." Yusei hummed to the soft beat and then started singing.
I know I wasn't there
When you needed me the most
I know I didn't care
And was afraid to get so close
Tonight it's getting hard to fall asleep
Cause it's becoming clear that I broke all into pieces
And I can not reverse it
So I've got one more thing to say
No one believed me at first that Yusei could sing, not unless they heard it in person or on recording. But Yusei was embarrassed by this so we made it our little secret.
I'm sorry for your pain
I'm sorry for your tears
For all the little things I didn't know
I'm sorry for the words I didn't say
But what I still do
I'm still loving you
I know I let you wait
I've been away for far too long
But now I can relate
To everything that I did wrong
Stop breathing when I think I'm losing you
And there'll be no excuse so I'm on my knees
So listen please
Let me hold your hand once again
He grabbed my hand, leaned his forehead on my and closed his eyes,
His eyelashes brushed mine and I closed my eyes, listening to his apology.
I'm sorry for your pain
I'm sorry for your tears
For all the little things I didn't knowI'm sorry for the words I didn't say
I'm sorry for the lies
I'm sorry for the fights
For not showing my love a dozen times
I'm sorry for the things that I've called mine
But what I still doI'm still loving you
I'm sorry for your painI'm sorry for your tears
For all the little things I didn't know
I'm sorry for the words I didn't say
I'm sorry for the lies
I'm sorry for the fights
For not showing my love a dozen times
I'm sorry for the things that I've called mine
But what I still do
I'm still loving you
That's what I will always do
"I love you Aki." Yusei whispered to me. One tear fell down my eyes and he wiped them away. Then he gently touched my lips in a sweet chaste kiss.
"And our next song is Beauty from Pain by Superchick."
The sweet melody played, the notes from low to high. I hummed to the beat before singing.
The lights go out all around me
One last candle to keep out the night
And then the darkness surrounds me
I know I'm alive but I feel like I've died
"You haven't died Aki." Yusei whispered to me.
"I know but it felt like it."
And all that's left is to accept that it's over
My dreams ran like sand through the fists that I made
"I'm sorry." He whispered. I just laid down, my head on his chest, listening to his heart beat while singing.
I try to keep warm but I just grow colder
I feel like I'm slipping away
After all this has passed, I still will remain
After I've cried my last, there'll be beauty from pain
Though it won't be today,
Someday I'll hope again
And there'll be beauty from pain
You will bring beauty from my pain
"You always do." I whispered to him.
My whole world is the pain inside me
The best I can do is just get through the day
When life before is only a memory
I'll wonder why God lets me walk through this place
And though I can't understand why this happened
I know that I will when I look back someday
And see how you've brought beauty from ashes
And made me as gold purified through these flames
After all this has passed, I still will remain
After I've cried my last, there'll be beauty from pain
Though it won't be today,
Someday I'll hope again
And there'll be beauty from pain
You will bring beauty from my pain
Here I am, at the end of me
Tryin to hold to what I can't see
I forgot how to hope
This night's been so long
I cling to your promise
There will be a dawn
"There will always be a dawn. No matter where you are. Away from me or not."
"Do you promise?" I asked
"I promise."
After all this has passed, I still will remain
After I've cried my last, there'll be beauty from pain
Though it won't be today,
Someday I'll hope again
And there'll be beauty from pain
You will bring beauty from my pain
"Yusei can you bring me beauty from pain?" I looked at him longingly. I know he could but now he just have to say yes.
"Yes." Then he kissed me, and that was my happy ending.
So what did you think. Good, bad, terrible. Review.