Title: the rivers in egypt
summary: and a little part of her knows it too because God, she isn't stupid. But ignorance is supposed to be bliss—humanstuck au, Feferi/Sollux/Eridan
notes: um, first homestuck fanfic hi. Also i'm back from the dead...kinda
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"You missed swim practice yesterday."
The tone is knowing and more than a little accusing. Feferi doesn't say anything, doesn't look away from her locker at all.
"You never miss swim practice. But I haven't seen you there in three days—I haven't really seen you at all for three days," Eridan continues, "I'm starting to feel like you're avoiding me." He pauses for a moment. "Are you?"
She shakes her head, dark hair flying everywhere. "No, no—of course not," she says and he is unconvinced. "I was just...I've been hanging out with Sollux lately." She doesn't need to look at him to see the hardened glare and instant scowl that appears whenever Sollux is mentioned in one of their conversations.
Feferi pretends to organize the books in her locker because she does not want to see the angry hurt look in Eridan's eyes that he disguises with the tough glares. She does not want to feel the guilt because it's not like she's doing anything wrong.
(except you know how he feels about you and it isn't right to keep stringing him along like this because he's your best friend and you still want to be with him but you want Sollux too and goddamnit Feferi you're so selfish think about his feelings for once)
Eridan clenches his fists by his sides and grinds his teeth together in frustration. "Look," she says and closes the locker door and clicks the combination lock back on, "I'll be at practice today okay? I promise."
He lets out a frustrated cry. "Ugh, it's not even about that anymore it's—Dammit Feferi look at me!" He pounds a fist on the nearby locker, startling her and causing her to look at him strangely.
(you shouldn't have looked at him because now your gut is wrenching and twisting and being tortured by an unseen force because he's hurting and it's all your fault why are you so selfish?)
Suddenly Feferi is sick of this whole thing because it's the same thing over and over again. She frowns at him, feeling angry and sick and tired. "What is your problem?" she asks harshly and tries not to yell in case a teacher passes by. "What's my problem?" Eridan repeats, "He's my problem. You two together is my problem. Why can't you see that you're so much better than him?"
"Because I'm not!" she exclaims, "So stop saying that! Stop bringing up the rich/poor thing because I don't care. I just—ugh—you're my friend Eridan okay? And Sollux is—Sollux is my friend too and you need to learn to accept that." He scoffs and gives her a look that she knows says 'you're so stupid sometimes Fef.'
"Tch. Boys and girls can't be just friends Fef and you need to accept that," he says and she wants to say 'What about us then?' but she doesn't because she already knows the answer to that one because God, she isn't stupid. But ignorance is supposed to be bliss right?
They're silent for a while and then Feferi says, "I have to get to class. I'll see you at swim practice today, okay?" Eridan just rolls his eyes and snorts. "Right." He walks the opposite way down the hall, hands shoved in his pockets and scowling.
Feferi sighs and leans into the gray metal lockers and wishes she wasn't so selfish.