I was concerned with publishing this story, because some people may think it's a little mean. However, I thought it was worth it for reasons I'll list at the end of the story. Thank you, Amtrak12, for looking my story over. You know how much I value your Mrs. Cooper analysis!

DISCLAIMER: I own nothing…not even Paul…wow, that's sad.

"Hello?" Mrs. Cooper put down her tea and leaned back against the sofa.

"Hi, Mrs. Cooper? It's Penny. Sheldon's neighbor."

"Well hi, there! How are you? What's my Shelly gone and done now?" Mary smiled to herself. Now that he didn't live with her she never tired of hearing all the crazy things her son was up to.

"He's in Montana. Well, actually, he's on his way to Montana. He says he's going to live there now."

"Oh dear, is this still about the robbery?" Mary tsked and put down her knitting.

"You know about that?"

"Leonard called me. I told him that Shelly would be fine in time. His father, God rest his soul, used to always say to me 'Mary, you have to take your time with Sheldon.' I always took that to heart, and it always worked. So, Shelly's gone to the Big Sky state, has he?"

"Yes," said Penny. "He taped a good-bye for us and slipped out while we were watching it. I'm calling you because I was hoping that you could persuade him to come back. He's my best friend, like the sweet, funny sibling I never had, and I'm probably overreacting, but…I don't think he'll last long without the four of us. I know he's a grown man, but I'm still worried about him."

Mary was pleased at the motherly tone in Penny's voice. Mary remembered her sister worrying when her daughter went out on her own, and she detected the same tenor in Penny's voice. So her little Shelly had a surrogate big sister out in that awful California place. This pleased her. "Where in Montana is he headed?" She heard Penny repeat the question to someone in the room, say, "thanks, honey," and address Mary again. "Bozeman. Bozeman, Montana."

"Thank you. I'll see what I can do," Mary said. She knew what Penny was feeling. They may not be as smart as her Shelly, but they both knew one thing: Sheldon Lee Cooper was not the type of person that could survive and maintain his sanity (questionable sanity, she swore that those test results were fudged) without his constants-his friends.

Mary reached for the phone again. She had a plan. True, it would scare him a little, but oftentimes with children it was best to let them put a finger on a stove to avoid being burned worse later. Shelly was still her baby, her youngest, if only younger than Missy by three minutes. If this plan worked, Shelly would be on his way back to California almost immediately, back to where he truly was safe.

"Hello?"

Mary smiled as she heard the voice on the other end. "Paul? It's Mary Cooper. Missy's mom? She babysat you when you were living in Texas?"

"Mrs. Cooper! Hello, how are you doing?"

"I'm splendid, you?"

"Fine, fine. Senior year is great. What do you need?" Mary told him her plan. "That's a little mean, don't you think?"

"Yes, a little," Mary admitted. She could hear the hesitancy in Paul's voice. "But this isn't something that I can handle over the phone, and by the time I get there worse must have happened to him. We need to get him home to his friends that care about him."

"What if I talked to him?"

"You think he'll listen to you? Go for it. He may just recognize you and want to stay at your place until he found somewhere to live. You'll be sent to the couch, as he needs to sleep in a bed. He'll want to play mind games all night. Oh, and in the morning, do NOT use the bathroom at 8:20 or you will be sorry for the rest of your life. Remember that, or…you could do what I suggested."

"Okay, I'll do it. When and where?"

A few hours later the phone rang again. Mary reached for it. It was Paul. "I've got the stuff. He's on his way home."

"Good, good." Mary took a sip of her tea. "You didn't scare him too badly, did you?"

"I think he was more annoyed."

"That's my Shelly."

"What should I do with his stuff?"

"Send it down my way, and I'll get it back to him. Thank you much, Paul."

Mary hung up the phone. It was a full-time job being mother to a homo-novus. Luckily the good Lord blessed her with two other children who were dumb as soup. And much less likely to overreact.

If any of you have read my fics, you'll have a pretty good idea of how much I adore Mrs. Cooper. I know that for her to intentionally get her son robbed could be considered a bit mean, but in the show Sheldon was not totally terrified at the second robbery, and this way he gets his stuff back! I also wanted to acknowledge the Sheldon/Penny friendship and I liked the idea of both Leonard and Penny calling Sheldon's mama in concern for him.

Hope you liked it!