Coward, a harry potter fanfic

Disclaimer: don't own

Author's note: Hi all! This is my first Harry Potter fanfic. I tend to start new fandoms with drabbles, so that I can get the feel for characterization before I go in-depth with it. This one is in Lupin's POV, right after he storms out of the house in Deathly Hallows.

Coward.

The word refuses to leave my mind. I don't want to think that Harry's right. I want to think that he's troubled, lashing out because of stress, worry, even his own arrogance...

But it only takes me a moment to realize how true he is. I am a coward. I may have been in Gryffindor when I was in Hogwarts, but I'm not anything more than a coward.

I'm hiding from my responsibilities. Everything Harry said was right; I'm trying to play hero, to feel young and free again. And if I get killed... that would be selfish of me. No child should have to grow up without a parent. Harry has had to live without both of them, and after seeing that, you would think I would know better than to abandon a child.

I don't want our child to be a werewolf like me. It's sheer hell- I've told Tonks that. But I shouldn't make it worse by doing this.

But I don't feel ready to go back yet, either.

I am such a coward.