In series 3, I can't help but be curious as to the reason for the pause before Anthony says "always" to Edith before turning and leaving the church. I feel that the word was meant to stand apart from "and may god bless you my dearest darling." I mean, he even leans in and lowers his voice as if trying to convey some special meaning intended only for Edith. Or, perhaps I'm just reading way too much into the jilting scene! Anyhow, thoughts and comments are always appreciated!
Lines from canon belong to JF.
Anthony Strallan sat in his library, staring vacantly out at the vast expanse of Locksley, still trying to process the unfortunate news he'd received earlier that morning. An ill-fated, though not unexpected, phone call from the specialist in London confirming that the baronet had, perhaps, six months to live. A few more, if, in the doctor's opinion, certainly not Anthony's, he were lucky. Cancer. A diagnosis the older gentleman had first received in Italy, where he'd hidden away for the past 10 years, following that dreadful day he'd jilted Lady Edith at the altar. And so, after fooling himself into thinking that his feelings for a certain strawberry blonde had diminished, the blue eyed baronet, wishing to live out the remainder of his days at his beloved Locksley, had sold the villa in Tuscany, all furnishings included. Well, everything, save for his books, his gramophone and beloved recordings, and the one possession most near and dear to his old heart, a collection of keepsakes and mementos. Precious belongings with which he refused to part, a self-made shrine of sorts to his time spent with Edith.
Once back in Yorkshire though, tortured by the bittersweet memories, the older gentleman thought that returning to his ancestral home was, quite possibly, a huge mistake. Edith was everywhere. He saw her sitting in the gardens, reading in the library, walking in the orchards, taking tea in the drawing room. Anthony was haunted as well by reminders of that fateful decision with which he had condemned himself to a life of loneliness and grief. And, the nightmares were back. Dark dreams filled with ghostly grooms, faceless brides, and cries of anguish. Anthony shuddered, he had no idea why Stewart insisted on remaining in his employ.
Yes, an array of memories abounded, but recently, the one that most occupied Anthony's mind these days was his final words spoken to the young woman who'd been his sweet one, Goodbye my dearest darling, and may God bless you. Always. He'd often wondered if, once the initial shock and heartache of his betrayal had worn off, Edith had noted the significance of that final word. Always. He hadn't a chance to talk privately with the young woman before the wedding. The couple, it seemed, was constantly being watched. Someone listening in on their conversation. And, it certainly wouldn't have been proper to speak freely of such personal feelings in a church filled with guests. And so, he'd chosen his last words carefully, hoping it would sound, to those in attendance, as though the tall blond were simply wishing that God would always bless her but that Edith, intelligent young woman that she was, catching the deliberate pause, as he leaned in to whisper the word meant only for her ears, would know the always was meant to stand apart from all other sentiments the baronet had uttered. He'd wanted to convey in some small way, the depth of his love for her, as well as remind her why he felt the need to set her free. And so, with that one word, Anthony had willed the young woman to understand that although he had hurt her terribly, she must always remember how he had told her, on more than one occasion, that, whether or not she believed it, he had always known that she was special, not only to him but the world around her as well. That in this post war era, in which women were slowly being given more opportunity, he had always stressed, that she had the potential to accomplish great things if only she'd step outside the boundaries that society placed upon her. He would always be her champion, if not in body at least in spirit. He had always known that his loss would be the world's gain and he had been right. And, most of all, Anthony had wanted her to know she would always, ALWAYS, have his heart.
Anthony sighed, so many times he'd wanted to write to Edith, explaining himself, just in case she hadn't fully understood the reasoning behind his actions. But most importantly, he'd wanted to make certain she was aware of all the different connotations and subtle nuances his always had implied. Perhaps, it would be acceptable to write now. After all, she was settled with a family. Successful. And he, he was dying. Perhaps, she would reply, saying she'd forgiven him. At least then, he could face death with some degree of peace.
Picking up his pen, he began to write
I've completed an outline for this story but find I'm wondering whether folks in the Andith community would be interested in reading it. I'd appreciate your thoughts on whether or not to continue. Thanks!