"We'll I hate you too!" I shouted, sliding to the floor as the last person who ever paid attention to me walked away, her ever graceful walk skipping out of my sight for the last time. It wasn't fair. Ever since S. Korea had been bombed to death by his northern brother, Taiwan had been depressed. She'd taken it out on him, claiming it was his fault South Korea was dead. If only he hadn't left England, he might not be in this mess...
England. To hear that name broke my soul into tiny bits, and those shards cut up my already broken heart. I felt alone. Australia was there for me, but he was busy with his fiancé and wedding plans. The nightmares weren't so bad with people around, chasing away thoughts with an abundance of happiness. On my own...the gunshots seemed so real. Watching my people groan and curl up on the floor...
I remembered it all to well. A stubborn man who loved, but would not except the fact that love could not become something more between relatives. A small flicker of light that was put out the moment I asked- no, demanded, my independence. He denied me, ignored my peoples protest. But then it caught up with him. Currently fighting with France, his taxes and debt were high. He called on my people for assistance. They refused to pay him.
England took his frustration out on me. By that time, our relationship was already a dying flame. The pain I was in...I bled the cries of the colonists. Making him angrier still, I couldn't- wouldn't control them. I only supported their distressed cries for help. France, Spain, and, a great kingdom at the time, Prussia listened and sent me reinforcement. They were the ones who taught me to fight as though I felt nothing.
After winning the war, Britian ignored me. Any attempt to rekindle the coals was, and will always seem, futile. But it was somehow possible. Even no, hundreds of years later, I can still remember the words he spoke that day.
"You idiot! Why can't you follow anything through to the end?!"
"There's no way I can shoot you. I can't. Its not fair! Damn it why?!"
I responded softly, "you know why."
I missed him more than anything. Truth be told, I would give anything to be his colony again. Go back to the better days. Filled with love...no matter how scarce, far spread. Even so far apart, we still touched hands. I sank to the kitchen floor, tears streaming down my cheeks. It wasn't fair...he was right. It isn't fair. Oh England...the things I'd tell you...
"I love you." More than anything, I added mentally. I let out a distressed sob, the sound escaping my lips like the noise of a dying animal. The phone let out a loud ring. It refused to relent, and I was forced to answer it, no matter how alone I wanted to be.
"H-hello...?"
"America? It's Britain, your late for the meeting between our bosses." Cold voiced as usual. "Have you been crying...?" I hiccuped and took a deep breathe.
"Why would I cry...? My life is...less than perfect, but still...Britain...I'm not coming to the meeting. Positive you'll manage without me, as all I ever do is mess shit up. Thanks anyways..." I prepared myself to hang up, but he interrupted me.
" I'll be over in a few, Al." He sounded worried.
"That won't be necessary. I'm perfectly alright."
"No your not. Shut up, bloody git. I'm already in the car...see you soon." Shit...no...No...no...I'm doomed, I'll break down and sob my eyes out if he looks at me all brotherly. No...I set the receiver on the hook gently, turning and curling up on the couch. Pulling a blanket around my shoulders, I shook violently, despite being warm. What would he say to the traitorous brat who left him...? I will not cry...he can NOT see me cry...
England entered using a key my boss had probably given him, seeing as how he didn't have one of his own, and called out.
"Alfred? Love, where are you?" His voice sounded soft, loving...it broke my heart into even tinier pieces. I think I perfer being ignored...he found me sniffling on the couch. Wrapping his arms around me, I broke down. Sobbing, telling him I was sorry. All he did was pet my hair and nod. When I calmed down a bit, he kissed my forehead.
"I love you too." Those were the words that inspired me to live my life as I do now.
I turned towards my husband bemused, breaking into full out laughter while he played with little Adam. New York was growing fast, and we both loved him with all our extremely big hearts, as much as we loved each other. To this day I have learned to regret nothing, because where would you be without doing it?