So I wrote this one-shot (my first time writing fanfiction, though I am a long-time reader and no stranger to writing itself) for the Rizzles Fanfic Challenge this week on Tumblr and I just found out that it freaking WON. I'm almost jumping up and down right now, I'm so excited!
If you haven't seen it there already, here it is. I hope you enjoy. :-)
"If anyone can show just cause why this couple cannot lawfully be joined together in matrimony, let them speak now or forever hold their peace."
Throughout the sanctuary, no one says a word, all eyes fixed on Casey and me.
The silence is unbearable.
Maura, please.
Still no word, not even a cough from anyone in attendance.
Please don't let me do this, Maura. Say something. Tell them I'm being forced to marry him so that he doesn't go back to a war-torn country and put his life on the line yet again. Tell them I'm being guilted into marrying him.
I don't know how long the priest is going to wait before continuing on with the ceremony. Five seconds? Ten seconds? How long has it been? I can't remember anymore and it feels as if it has been forever already.
Casey looks at me and smiles. My stomach churns at the thought of being bound to this man for the rest of my life. I love him somewhere deep down, in my own way, but he stifles me. Most of the time when he's around, I feel as if he is choking me, siphoning away the independence I have fought my entire life to maintain.
God, Maura, why aren't you saying something? Just say it. Tell them you love me. Tell them I love you. Please.
I can almost feel the bile rising in my esophagus and I swallow hard, trying to push it back down.
My best friend and love of my life, standing right behind me as my Maid of Honor, says nothing.
Maura.
A lump forms in my throat. Tears burn my eyes.
Casey smiles at me again, and it finally registers with me that the moment to object has passed.
I hear Casey repeating after Father Crowley. "I, Charles, take thee, Jane, to be my lawfully wedded wife…"
I can't do this. I can't. This isn't right. I'm not supposed to be standing here with Casey saying these words.
My gut is screaming at me to run, to turn around, grab Maura's hand, and simply take off.
"Jane."
Run.
Run.
Fucking run, Jane. Go! Now!
"Jane!" Casey hisses softly between clenched teeth.
I squeeze my eyes shut and shake my head, trying to refocus. Casey has been saying my name. Opening my eyes, his brow furrows with concern and I swallow hard. He quickly tilts his head toward the priest, who has been trying to get me to start saying my vows.
"Please repeat after me. 'I, Jane, take thee, Charles,'" Father Crowley starts.
There is a wad of cotton in my mouth, I'm sure of it. I can't speak and finally I look to him, trying to remember the words he wants me to repeat. "I, Jane, take thee, Charles," he says again.
Maura.
"I, J-Jane," I stutter, looking at Father Crowley, "take thee—" I stop, swallowing again, and look from the gray-haired man to my fiance, standing there in front of me.
I have no clue how much time passes.
"Jane?" I hear a soft voice whisper behind me. Warmth touches the small of my back and I can feel it even through my dress. Maura's hand.
Maura.
Her breath is hot in my left ear, her quiet voice melodic and soothing. "Are you okay?"
"Maura," I choke out.
Suddenly my beautiful best friend is standing before me and her concern is nearly palpable in the air surrounding us. "Jane?" Her hand presses against my cheek. I feel her thumb drag the skin below my eye downward and she squints, looking into my eye. Her other hand cups my other cheek, then checks my other eye. Both of her hands then drop to grab my own.
"Maura," I whisper, looking into her green eyes. I try desperately to tell her how I felt without speaking.
I love you. Don't let me marry him. Please.
"Is she okay? What's wrong with her?" Casey asks quietly behind Maura.
Muscles in Maura's throat shift as she swallows and then moistens her lips, her tongue flicking out briefly. As she glances back at Casey, I hear her say, "I'm not sure. I think," Maura pauses again to swallow. "I think she needs to lie down for a few minutes."
"Now?" Casey's eyes widen.
"I'm not certain of how much she's eaten today," Maura explains softly, glancing back to meet my gaze. I can tell she is trying her hardest to convince herself that this is the truth, that she truly isn't certain of how much food I have had since this morning. "She may be hypoglycemic."
"Everybody's sitting here staring at us, Maura," my fiance whispers to her.
"Father Crowley," Maura says softly, turning to face the priest. "Would you please tell everyone that Jane is not well and I need to go examine her to make sure she doesn't need further medical care than I can provide?"
Out of the corner of my eye, I can see the pale-faced priest merely nodding in consent. I don't take my eyes off of my beautiful Maura.
As Maura loops her arm underneath mine and around my waist to support me, I hear my mother cry out, before rushing up to us from the front pew. "Janie? Maura, what's wrong with her?"
I feel my brow furrowing automatically as I mumble, "I just need to lie down for a bit, okay? Just stay here."
Ma, please. I just need to be alone with Maura. Just let me be alone with her. I beg my mother with my eyes. Please.
Somehow Ma relents and allows Maura to lead me through a side door of the sanctuary, back through a corridor to the bridal suite. Each step we take further away from the ceremony loosens the panic in my chest.
As Maura leads me through the door and shuts it behind us, she comes to stand in front of me and I realize for the first time that she isn't holding my bridal bouquet, nor her own. Casey must be standing there at the altar holding them both. Slowly I lift my head to meet her curious, but frightened eyes. "You didn't say anything."
Her facial expression softens. "Legally, it wouldn't have made a difference, Jane."
Legally?
"It would have made a difference to me, Maura," I whisper, clenching my jaw in an effort to maintain my composure.
Her eyes water as she bites her lip, fighting back tears. "Only you could have broken the silence. I learned a long time ago that Jane Rizzoli is the only one who can stop Jane Rizzoli from doing what she wants to do."
"I don't want to marry Casey, Maura," I sob, grabbing her hands, weaving our fingers together. Pulling her closer, I press my forehead to hers and we stand there in silence for several moments.
Tell her. Tell her that the only person in this world you want to spend the rest of your life with is her. Tell her that you're sorry you never said anything, sorry that you were too afraid. Tell her—
"Then what do you want, Jane?"
To run away and marry you instead. That's the only thing I want.
"Are your car keys in here?" I suddenly pull back and glance around the room for Maura's belongings. Spotting them across the room by a full-length mirror, I fly across the room, dragging her behind me, and pick up her bags. I quickly hand them to her and her hazel eyes widen for only a second.
"Jane?"
I buzz around the rest of the room, picking up my own stuff and shoving it all into the one bag I'd brought with me to the church.
"Jane, what are you doing?" Maura's voice is on the verge of frantic.
Get out. Get your stuff and go. Grab Maura's hand and pull her out the door. Drive away from this church and don't look back.
I spin around, a sense of urgency swirling inside me. As her eyes meet mine, all I can manage to say is, "Come with me, Maura."
Maura's bags fall to the floor. "Jane, we can't just leave! You have nearly 100 guests in that sanctuary waiting on you to come back!"
Tell her.
I drop my bag and close the distance between us, tangling my fingers in her half-pinned up curls and smashing my lips against hers. I kiss her with the desperation I know is rushing through my veins, trying to convey everything I feel for her in that very moment.
She pulls away, gasping for breath, and I repeat, "Come with me."
Please love me too.
Bending down, Maura unzips one of her bags and I hear the jangling of keys. She rezips it and presses the keys into my hands. Scooping up the handles of her bags with her right hand, she reaches for my hand with her other. I transfer the keys into my left hand and intertwine my right fingers with hers.
We then rush toward the door, and I swoop my left hand down to pick up my bag as we pass it. Clinging tight to Maura's keys and the cloth handles of my bag with my thumb and first two fingers, I pull the door wide open with last two.
"I parked behind the church," Maura whispers to me and I immediately hang a left to lead us out of the church through the back.
Because we both have on heels, we have to tiptoe as silently as possible toward the exit.
Please nobody hear us. Please nobody hear us.
I push open the door as quietly as I can, and hold it open for Maura, which forces our hands to break apart. Stepping through the doorway, I turn my head toward the door, making sure I let it close behind me without a sound. I then look forward once more and as I take a step, I immediately bump into Maura.
"Maur, go! Somebody's gonna—"
"Vince," I hear Maura whisper.
Korsak is standing next to Maura's car, looking at us.
Shit, Korsak! Just let us go. Please don't try and stop me from doing this.
I swallow and push Maura toward him, whispering, "Maura, go!" As we both walk toward him, I lift my hand with Maura's keys and my thumb finds the unlock button, as well as the trunk button to pop it open.
Nevertheless I can feel panic seeping into my bones and my chest tightens as we approach him and Maura's Prius. "Korsak," I start to say before he quickly holds up a hand.
"I don't like the way you've done this, Janie," he interrupts quietly.
He's going to stop us. Oh god, Korsak. Please! Maura and I have to—
My former partner continues, "But I know better than to argue with you. Either way, some detective you are if it took you this long to realize."
My brow furrows briefly in confusion and then it hits me exactly what he means. "I knew it all along. I was just too chicken shit." My voice is quiet and I can feel the onslaught of tears rising within me. "Korsak, we have to go. Now."
He then steps away from the car, backwards, still facing us as we both put our bags into the trunk. "Do you want me to tell your mother—"
"No," I shake my head adamantly and I suddenly feel grateful that I never told anyone, including my nosy mother, where I had purchased airline tickets and reservations to for the honeymoon. "I'll call her when we get where we're going."
I feel Maura's hand touch my forearm. "Where are we going?"
"Korsak, go! You never saw us, okay?" Please don't spill the beans. Just let me deal with the consequences of doing this later.
I slam the trunk closed and move around to the driver's side, hitching up my long dress as I climb in. As I close the door, I look over at Maura, who's scrambling into the passenger's seat. I pull the safety belt over me as I start the engine. In my peripheral vision I see that Maura has barely fastened her seatbelt before I shift into gear and press down on the accelerator.
Just keep driving.
"Jane, where are we going? I don't have any clothes to wear. You don't have any clothes to wear," Maura interrogates.
"I have what I wore to the church. It's fine enough for now. We can buy clothes when we get there, right? No big deal."
"I understand that you feel we need to leave quickly, but I need you to tell me where we're going. Are we leaving the country? If so, I'm going to need my passport, which means we have to stop by my house. We don't have any choice."
Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck!
"Goddammit!" I yell, and I can see Maura jump slightly at the volume of my voice. When I speak again, I make sure it's much quieter. "I just want to get out of here. I just want to leave and take you with me and deal with everything later, okay? Can we do that? Please?"
Maura's hand coming to rest on my leg calms me. "I need ten minutes at most, okay? I can run inside, get my passport out of the safe, and come right back out."
Her hand remains on my leg the rest of the way to her house. When we pull up there 20 minutes later, I throw the gear into park and unlock the doors. As she opens her door to get out, I lean over the seat and grab her arm, pulling her back. I kiss her fiercely, pulling at her bottom lip with my teeth as she breaks away. The words are on the tip of my tongue. I love you.Instead I whisper, "Thank you."
She cups my cheek for a moment, searching my eyes. "Why don't you come inside with me and change out of your dress, Jane?" She looks at the keys in the ignition. "I need my keys to get inside anyway."
I chew my lip for a moment before responding. "Ten minutes, okay?"
We're running out of time. Someone is going to find us, Maura.
I grab her keys and get out of the car. Maura meets me in front of the car and I grab her hand as we rush toward the side door of her home.
"The flight doesn't leave until tomorrow morning, but I'm sure we can switch it to an earlier one," I whisper as I fumble for the right key, sliding it into the lock and turning the small piece of metal.
But this is going to cost me an arm and a leg.
"Jane, will you please tell me exactly where we're going?"
I glance back at her over my shoulder and reply, "I booked a cruise around the Mediterranean for two weeks. It starts in Spain and stops in France, Italy, and Greece, including some of the islands."
"Does anyone know?"
I know what she really wants to ask is if Casey knows. I suddenly feel relieved that I kept the honeymoon a surprise.
"No," I tell her as I pull her through the kitchen and living room toward the stairs. "But it's not going to be a secret for long. Between Frost, Frankie, and Korsak, they'll figure it out before our plane even lands in Spain."
Eleven minutes later, we're throwing a large suitcase, because Maura insisted, with clothes haphazardly folded and tossed inside into the trunk of her car. I left my wedding dress lying across the foot of Maura's bed and my heels kicked off somewhere in her bedroom.
I quickly place the keys in the ignition and turn them gently, barely hearing the Prius' engine purr to life. My hand is on the gear shift and still I cannot seem to press in the brake with my foot and shift into reverse.
Do this. Put the car in reverse and pull away. Maura is sitting next to you, right there in the passenger seat. She wants to jump on a plane with you and leave everything behind. Because you asked her to. Because she loves you. Nothing else matters.
Still I hesitate and stare forward, not speaking, entirely unsure of whether it's only seconds or minutes that pass.
Her voice is quiet and smooth like honey when she speaks to me. My eyes flutter shut the moment the first syllable leaves her mouth. "Jane, are you sure this is what you want to do?" She gently places her hand on top of mine, still resting on the gear shift in the console between us.
Yes. I want to do this with you.
Without a word I open my eyes and I can't fight back the smile that begins to spread across my face. Pressing my foot down on the brake, I look over at her and move the gear shift into reverse. Before I raise my foot off the pedal to back up, I turn my right hand over underneath hers and grasp hers gently, lifting it to my lips to place a gentle kiss on the back of her hand.
When she smiles at me in return, I have to remind myself to breathe. She places her hands together in her lap and I can't yet seem to say the words I long to tell her.
I love you, Maura.
I let my foot off the brake slowly, and as the car inches backwards, I turn my upper body around to pay attention. Finally we are completely out of the driveway.
I shift the car into drive.
Maura.
My right foot presses down on the gas pedal.
Maura.
I take a deep breath. I smile.
Finally.