Written for RiversHolidayChallenge on Tumblr by loki-the-fox...
Prompt: "But it's Christmas... You're supposed to be here with me."

Worry: The heaviness of the armour. Tony stuck inside the mansion. Watching him fall into the water and not see him emerge. Thinking he was dead; their last meaningful conversation had ended with her walking out in him after a nightmare.

Pain: Maya's lies. Killian's flaming face and burning hands. Extremis searing through her veins. Throat raw from screaming for help, for relief, for Tony. Wondering if he'd be able to make it. Wondering if she deserved to be saved, after the way she'd let him down, not realising how afraid he was.

Panic: Killian pinning Tony to the metal floor, ready to burn him. Dangling over a hundred foot drop, knowing she wouldn't make it out of this alive. The despair in Tony's eyes as he struggled to reach her. The phantom brush of his fingers as she fell, screaming.

Fear: Killian hurting Tony. The sudden urge to murder the madman for laying a hand on him, for using her. The thought of hurting Tony, the man who'd risked his life for her, for the world. Trying to back away from him. Too late. Tony grabbed her hands, she let him, then watched in horror, unable to let go as fire spread from her hands and scorched his face, blackening his skin, taking away his smile-

"TONY!" Pepper screamed. The darkness of her surroundings pressed into her and she struggled to find the glowing blue light that had become her solace. But it wasn't there and she wanted to cry, to rage, she wanted to kill someone, anyone, who was keeping Tony away from her, because she couldn't have killed him, she wouldn't have killed him, she'd never be able to live with herself, without him-

"MISS POTTS!"

The loud voice shattered Pepper's panic and she realized she was on a couch in the front room of the house in Malibu. The papers scattered around her were indicating that she had dozed off while working. The clock on the wall read 9:30 pm. Just a couple hours till Christmas.

"J- JARVIS?" She called out in a tremulous voice.

"Right here, ma'am," the British voice said, something like relief coloring his words. "It appears you were suffering from a rather vivid nightmare that involved... The latest fiasco."

Pepper swallowed, trying to get her breath back. One whole year had passed and she still wasn't completely over it. She kept looking around herself, reflexively. But she knew that was irrational. Tony was on the other side of the country. Judging by the time here, he was probably still in a meeting with the Board.

"What's Tony doing, J?" She asked in a whisper, getting up to walk to the bedroom. She might as well get some proper sleep.

"I believe he would call it 'pissing off the old farts'," JARVIS replied and Pepper would have smiled at the oddity of hearing such terms in that posh accent, if she hadn't felt so shaken and disoriented, like she was going to break down in tears any minute now.

"Miss Potts?"

"Yes?"

"If I may," JARVIS hesitated. "I believe it might ease your mind to speak with sir once."

"No, JARVIS," Pepper protested, getting into bed. "He needs to discuss the holiday line with the Board. It's bad enough that I'm not there as CEO, we can't distract the head of R&D, too." She didn't mention how much it actually would help to hear Tony's voice.

"Pep?"

"What the f-?" Pepper bit her tongue as she stared up at the holographic screen displayed in front of her. Tony was on the other end of the video call, looking at her with worry. "JARVIS messaged me saying you were in distress? I've stepped out of the meeting for a break. Is everything alright?"

Pepper allowed herself a moment to simultaneously curse and praise JARVIS, then another moment to appreciate how unfairly good her resident genius looked with that white suit hugging his shoulders snugly and his hair artfully tousled as always, his dark gold eyes focused on her with an intensity that never failed to tender her breathless.

Then she came back to earth.

"I had a nightmare," she confessed, sitting up and drawing her knees up to her chest. "About... You know, Killian, Extremis, falling... I saw... I..."

Tony's brow smoothened in understanding. "You saw me die," he stated calmly. "And it was your fault."

Pepper nodded frantically. "How'd you know?"

"Because," he said softly. "I dream about you falling whenever we're separate."

"Can you come home?" Pepper asked softly, too prideful to plead. "Please?"

Tony bit his lip. "I don't know, honey," he said, apology and frustration leaking from his reply. "It's been a couple years since I actively attended a conference for more than just representation. They're not gonna let me go easily."

"But it's Christmas." Alright, she was wrong. She wasn't totally above begging. Sue her. "It's Christmas and you're supposed to be here with me."

Tony's face went pinched for a second, then relaxed. "I'll be there as soon as I can," he promised. "See you." The screen went dark before Pepper could ask what he meant.

To her infinite surprise, she actually did fall asleep. Maybe it was just the knowledge that Tony would be there. Whatever the case, something in her was calmer, letting her relax.

On some level of subconsciousness, she was aware of a warm body sliding into bed behind her, the touch of warm lips on her temple and rough fingers over her arm.

She woke to find brown eyes gazing at her, a smile tugging at usually smirking lips. "It's creepy to stare," were the first words out of her mouth.

Tony grinned. "Not if you're my girlfriend," he argued.

"When did you get here?" Pepper asked softly, tracing his goatee.

"An hour and a half after talking to you. I told the Board that we would continue the meeting later because the CEO," he paused to flick her nose. "Had just called to say she was giving everyone two weeks off on account of the holidays. Then I used the suit to fly over here."

Pepper stared. Tony frowned at her silence. "Sorry for not finishing the meeting," he said, not sounding sorry at all. "But you asked me to be here. How was I supposed to ignore-"

He shut up when she kissed him. "Merry Christmas, Miss Potts," he mumbled when they broke apart.

"Merry Christmas, indeed, Mr Stark," she murmured back. "Thanks for being here."

"Anytime."

"And for not getting another over-the-top gift like that rabbit."

"...Well, about that..."