Yuzuki's Notes: This was made of pure idiocy. I'm really hyper. So, I made this. Enjoy!!
Disclaimer: I don't own Bleach. But if I did, Ichigo would be a girl. And Kon would be a bear, not a lion. And I would be part of the show...hahahahahahahahahahahahaha. But I think Tite Kubo wouldn't like me, I'd screw it up and call it Twinkie...or Milk...or Tide...instead of Bleach.
Uryu Put Drugs In My Twinkie.
I'd Like To Thank That Stupid Twinkie That Made Me Sick, And My Nee-San, Nozomi. And All Who Read!
Narrator POV.
One day, Ichigo was eating lunch, as usual, on the rooftop, with Orihime, Chad, and Uryu. Ichigo sighed and pulled out what he had for lunch,
Ham sandwich.
Diet Soda.
A bag of sliced apples.
'Huh?' Ichigo pulled out a Twinkie. It was chocolate flavored, and he had a bad feeling about this, for some unusual reason. He sighed, he was too jumpy, especially since Hollows were bound to show up any second.
He looked at what the others were doing, quietly eating their lunch. Uryu, with out Ichigo noticing couldn't help but smirk.
'Heh...this is pay back...Kurosaki. You don't mess with the Quincy.'
He watched in victory as Ichigo bit into the Twinkie and swallowed the bite.
'Checkmate.'
Immediately, Ichigo had to crap. He didn't know why...maybe he was allergic to Twinkies?
"Um...Kurosaki-kun? You don't look so good." Orihime pointed out the obvious, Ichigo was turning bright green.
"Y-Yeah...I don't feel so... BLAH!"
"Ew! You threw up on my food!"
"Sorry, Inoue I...BLAH!"
Chad's foot had fresh puke on it. He looked up and said quietly. "Ew."
Uryu fell over laughing, almost drawing tears. Then he crossed his arms in X shape and manically laughed. "BUWUAHAHAHAHA! That's what happens when you mess with the Quincy! You get upchucked!"
"You evil little shit! I'll-" Ichigo then stopped, as Uryu was pointing at his pants, holding his hand with his mouth.
"What?" Ichigo looked down there...and noticed a large wet spot...
"HA! You pissed yourself!"
"YOU EVIL SICKO!!! I'LL...ahhhhhh..."
Ichigo then passed out, drool vibrating from his mouth. Uryu laughed, really hard. He fell over, the sight was creepy, psychotic....maniacal... (Yuzuki: Sexy...mmm...lol.)
"HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Yak...Ha...Ha....ha..." he cleared his throat, then sat himself down taking in deep breaths. Then when back to eating his lunch.
Orihime and Chad sat their, dumbfounded. "Um..."
Ichigo:
"...And that's how Uryu did it.
I learned my lesson.
NEVER, EVER eat Twinkies."
Me:
"Wow. That only makes Uryu ten times as hot... -drools-."
Ichigo:
"Were you even listening!? I'm trying to tell you a story!"
Me:
"I was listening."
Ichigo:
"...and?"
Me:
"-points and laughs- Ichigo pissed himself! BUWHAHAHAHAHA!"
Note To Readers: The Author, Yuzuki is not trying to say put drugs in your friends (or enemies) Twinkies. That's just wrong. She is trying to make fun of Ichigo. The whole point exactly.
Uryu:
"Um...why is this on fan fiction?"
Me:
"I'd just thought I'd let the readers know of your brilliant scheme!"
Uryu:
"Have you been stalking me again!?"
Me:
"What? No. I'm an innocent little girl."
Uryu:
"Innocent my ass!"
Me:
"Eh...something wrong with your ass...?"
Uryu:
"This is hopeless."
Will Uryu ever get through to Yuzuki? Will Ichigo ever dye his hair? Will Yuzuki ever listen to Ichigo?
Yuzuki:
"Yeah. Twinkies are DA bomb."
Will Yuzuki ever see how crazy she is? (No...)
Yuzuki:
"You may call me crazy, but you have no idea."
Uryu: So...is there some kinda moral to the story?
Yuzuki: -shrugs- What's a moral?
Uryu: Like a lesson...or...
Yuzuki: That's easy. TWINKIES ROCK!!
Uryu: No...it has to be one that makes sense.
Yuzuki: -crosses arms- Hmph. Then what do you suggest Mr Uryu-Twinkie-Hater-Ishida?!?
Uryu: The moral would be... "Trust your gut." or... "Know your enemy." or...
Yuzuki: -boo!- Boring! I like mine better.
Uryu: IT MAKES NO SENSE!
Yuzuki: -nods- YEAH it does, "Twinkies...ROCK!"
Uryu: -sighs- Forget it...
MORAL OF STORY:
TWINKIES ROCK.
-Thanks! And Review~! Or if you think this is crazy, or the author is crazy....don't be afraid to say it! She takes it as a compliment!!