A/N: This is chapter one of a multi-chapter fic. I'm not sure how many chapters it will be in the end, so I'm not even going to make an estimate. This fic is a collaboration with my best friend –ashimaru-. We combine our favorite couples occasionally. The results are…interesting. Yes, this is an AU. The characters are in college…ah, the temptation of a college AU. Fun.

DISCLAMER: We don't own it. Or them. Or anything related in any way whatsoever. Got it?

Japanese Note: Tadaima means "I'm back" or "I'm home."

Switching Roommates

Chapter One

The Trade

"Tadaima!"

Kagome let the door swing closed behind her and entered the tiny apartment. There was no reply.

"Suikotsu?" she called. Again no answer. Kagome walked through the entranceway into the living room. Her gay roommate, Suikotsu, was draped over the couch, staring at the blank TV screen.

"Did you want this on?" she asked, confused. Suikotsu shook his head. "Oookay…" Kagome perched on the arm of the couch. She glanced down at her roommate. Suikotsu's eyes were dull and listless—never a good sign. She narrowed her own eyes. "Did you take your medicine this morning?" she asked suspiciously. Suikotsu nodded, and Kagome sighed. Sui had been her best friend since elementary school. He'd always taken medicine to control his multiple personality disorder…and the duty of making sure he actually took it usually fell on her.

"Did you have a nice time with your boyfriend?" he grunted finally. Kagome sighed. So that was it.

"Yes, I had a nice time with Inuyasha," she replied, emphasizing his name. Kagome bit her lip, not wanting to antagonize him, but at the same time wanting more information. "Did you have a nice time at home?"

Suikotsu ignored her.

"Sui-i," Kagome put on her whiney voice.

"You sound like Jakotsu," Sui mumbled into a couch cushion. Kagome laughed.

"Likely. Sui, come on. What's wrong?"

"How come you always have a date?" he asked stolidly. Kagome shook her head.

"Because I have a boyfriend. Sui, it's not like you're not popular. Two different guys asked you out this week."

"Three," was his reply. "One was a girl."

"Okay…" Kagome trailed off. "So why didn't you accept any of them?"

"I'm gay."

"The guys, you idiot!"

Suikotsu was silent.

"Well, what was wrong with them? The one brown-haired gay was kind of hot."

"Too gay," Suikotsu said, still in a monotone.

"Sui," Kagome laughed, "you're gay."

"Not that gay."

Kagome rolled her eyes. "I think you'd better explain."

"Come on, Kagome. The guy wore lipstick. I'm into guys. Not girls. Gay guys are too much like girls for me."

"Okay…I guess I see your point…but what about the other one? With the black hair?"

"He had a purse."

"Oh."

Just then, Kagome's cell phone rang. She squealed and jumped for it. Sui, grinning, got to it first.

"Hello?"

There was a sigh on the other end. "Suikotsu?"

"Yup?"

"Put Kagome on."

"No."

"Oookay…"

"What do you want, Inuyasha?" Sui asked, grudgingly. "She just got back about a second ago."

Another sigh. "Take my roommate! Please!"

Sui blinked. "Renkotsu?"

"Hell yeah. Those people still won't let me trade roommates."

"He's a guy, right?"

"What the—um—yeah…"

Just then, Kagome grabbed the phone. "Inuyasha?"

"Please get rid of Renkotsu!" Inuyasha groaned.

Kagome sighed. "What did he do?" She was used to this. Inuyasha never stopped complaining about his roommate, Renkotsu. Kagome was glad she'd been able to get an off-campus apartment with her best friend. She didn't know Renkotsu very well…only that he and Inuyasha hated each other's guts, and were constantly trying to get rid of each other…one way or another.

"Don't ask. Doesn't matter. Just get me out of here!"

"Hmm…" Kagome got an idea. "Call you back in a sec, okay?"

"What? Sure. Hurry up."

Inuyasha hung up the phone. Kagome turned a brilliant smile on her roommate.

"Oh Sui-i-i!"

"Oh no."

"Do you mind doing me a big favor?' Kagome batted her eyelashes. Suikotsu rolled his eyes.

"Yes."

"Pretty please?"

"Still yes."

"With hot guys on top?"

"Ye—what?"

"Hot guys, Sui."

Suikotsu sighed. "What do you want, Kagome?"

"I want you to spend the night with Renkotsu."

Sui flushed bright red. "WHAT?!"

Kagome beamed. "He's hot, right? Minus the hair. But his dad's a monk. He made him. I'm sure it'll grow back, right?"

"When did I—what—I never said I wanted him!"

"He's a guy, Sui. He's not gay. He doesn't have a girlfriend. It's worth a try, isn't it?"

"Um—but—I—it's not like I like him, or anything!"

"Why are you denying it? I never said you did." As Sui flushed even redder, a memory flashed unbidden through Kagome's mind.

"Is your soup any good?" Kagome asked Suikotsu, who sat beside her in the college cafeteria.

"No," Sui replied. Kagome shook her head.

"No, neither is mine."

Suddenly, her head snapped up. Suikotsu followed her gaze. A boy with unusually long black hair had entered the cafeteria, violet eyes scanning the room. Kagome jumped out of her seat and waved to him. Suikotsu rolled his eyes…which were suddenly drawn to the boy standing a ways behind Kagome's boyfriend. He had a black bandana tied around his head. His black eyes also scanned the room, but not as though he was actually looking for something. He wore long black pants with way too many pockets and chains draped across them. His black tee-shirt had a picture of a flame printed on it. Suikotsu didn't even glance at Kagome as she got up to run and greet Inuyasha. His eyes remained on the boy in the flame tee-shirt. He only dragged his focus away when the boy started walking in his direction. He looked at Kagome. She had Inuyasha by the hand, and they were walking back toward the table. The boy was following. Sui's mouth dropped open, and he tore his gaze away, staring down into the depths of his miso soup.

He could hear Kagome talking softly to Inuyasha.

"I don't see why I can't introduce your roommate to my roommate. It's perfectly natural, right? And he doesn't know anyone here yet…"

"Kagome," Inuyasha interrupted her. "Trust me. You don't know Renkotsu like I do. He's pure evil. I swear."

"Come on, Inuyasha. Can't we just introduce them, once? For me?" Sui almost laughed as he pictured the look on Kagome's face. He knew that look too well. And he knew just how any guy but himself, or any guy who wasn't gay, anyway, would react. He smirked.

Before Inuyasha had a chance to answer, however, he felt a sharp tap on his shoulder. His head jerked up.

"I'm Renkotsu," said a smooth, deep voice. A voice that could only belong to him—to the boy Sui had been watching only moments before. Sui was good at paring voices to faces. So he shouldn't have been so very surprised when he looked up and saw the boy standing there, black bandana, flame tee-shirt and all.

"Ngaah!" he said. The boy blinked at him.

"Um…you're Inuyasha's girlfriend's roommate, right?"

Sui fell out of his chair. It clattered to the ground loudly. Blushing a bright fuchsia, Sui scrambled around on the ground, trying to right himself. His foot connected with something solid. When he felt something hot and wet land on his head, he knew that he'd kicked the table. And he was currently sporting his soup bowl as a hat.

He heard laughter, and prayed that the boy wouldn't laugh. Still trying to right himself, he listened for the boy's smooth voice to chime in. It never did.

"Here."

Suikotsu knocked his soup bowl off his head and looked up, ignoring the soup dripping into his eyes. The boy was smirking down at him, but he was offering his hand. Sui tried to avoid the boy's seemingly endless black eyes. A futile endeavor. Sui took the boy's hand, but was not entirely sure what he was supposed to do with it. Why was the boy offering him his hand? Why was he on the floor? What the hell was his name anyway?

Smiling meekly, Sui shook Renkotsu's hand. "Hi, how are you?" he asked politely.

"Good, thanks," Ren replied, still smirking. "Do you need help?"

Suikotsu blinked, and sighed. "Yes. I think so."

He realized he was still holding Renkotsu's hand, but wasn't quite sure how to let go.

He heard a female voice, and looked up in time to see Kagome smiling at the two of them, for all the world as though nothing out of the ordinary had just happened. "Sui, this is Inuyasha's roommate, Renkotsu. Renkotsu, this is Sui-kun, my best friend."

Suikotsu looked from Renkotsu's puzzled and slightly amused face, to Kagome's patient smile, to Inuyasha trying to suppress his laughter.

"Oh, shit," he said.

Ah, yes. Kagome remembered Ren and Sui's first meeting very well. Perhaps this plan would work even better than she'd originally intended.

Suikotsu narrowed his eyes as he recognized the slightly maniacal glint in his best friend's eyes. That look never boded well for him. Or anyone else who happened to be standing too close, for that matter.

"Sooo…Sui…" Kagome grinned. "How about it, hm? Will you spend one night with Renkotsu…uh…in Renkotsu's dorm?"

"I—" Sui paused, buying time. "I thought the whole idea was to get Inuyasha out of his dorm, not me into it."

Kagome beamed. "It is."

"But then…where's he going?" Sui turned puzzled eyes on Kagome, whose grin became wickeder still.

"It's a trade."

"OH." Sui's eyes widened. "Soo…you're trying to set me up with some guy I don't even know so that you can have a night with your boyfriend?"

Kagome nodded. "Yep!"

Sui sighed in defeat. "Fine. But you owe me one, Kagome."

"I thought getting to spend the night with Ren-kun was enough," she offered innocently. Sui glowered. Ignoring him, Kagome reached for her phone.

Sui watched nervously as Kagome dialed Inuyasha on speed dial. He listened warily to Kagome's side of the conversation.

"Hey. We can trade. Yeah. Sui agreed. Yup. Yup! What's Renkotsu think? Okay. Really? That's great! What?" She laughed. "Perfect! 'K, see you soon. Love you too. Bye bye!"

She pressed the end button and turned to Sui. "He's making miso soup," she said as innocently as she could manage. She did not miss Sui's sudden blush, or the fact that he suddenly jumped off the couch and ran to his bedroom. Giggling, Kagome followed him, stopping at the closed door. "Inuyasha's coming here, then we'll take you over to their dorm." She waited for an answer. None came. "Sui?" Again no reply. What's with this new idea of his of never answering me? "Suikotsu. Answer me or I'm coming in, no matter how undressed you are."

"I don't have any pants!" was his reply.

"Oookay…"

"This shirt's too gay! This shirt's too gay! This shirt's fucking ugly! This one's too gay too! This one's too orange! What the hell is this?!" There was a short pause. "Why the fuck is everything I own so gay?"

"Sui, honey, you're gay. Hate to break it to you."

In response, he burst out of the room wearing some sort of tank top and a towel wrapped around his waist. "See what I mean?" he exclaimed. "This looks like a girl's shirt!"

"Sui?" Kagome patted him on the shoulder. "That's my shirt."
He looked down at himself. Then he looked at the room behind him. "Oh," he muttered. "This is your room." As he pushed past her to get to his room, he grumbled "Your clothes are gay."

"Mmm-hm!" Kagome followed him into his room this time. "You, Sui, need help."

He balked. "Hell no. You are not dressing me!"

"Oh, I think you can handle putting the clothes on yourself. I'm just going to choose them."

With that, she began rummaging through his laundry basket, since she knew better than to think that he'd actually put anything away.

She threw some shorts at him, and finally came up with a black tee-shirt that had a picture of a squirrel eating a nut. Bigger than yours was printed across it in large letters.

"No," said Sui. Kagome laughed

"They aren't?"

"No! Well, yes! I mean, bigger than yours! Because you don't have them! You're a girl! But Ren's! No! Maybe! How the fuck would I know?!"

"Weeell…" Kagome brandished the shirt at him. "You'll just have to find out, then, won't you?"

"Aaaak!" Sui grabbed the shirt and threw it across the room. It landed on top of a lamp and stayed there. "When did you become such a pervert, Kagome?"

"Maybe I've been hanging out with Miroku too much, hm?" Kagome laughed. Sui grimaced, thinking of Kagome's very hot, very perverted, and very straight friend. Rolling her eyes, Kagome tossed him a plain black shirt and turned around so that he could change.

"Okay, I'm changed," Sui said. Kagome turned around. "Um, Kagome?" Sui avoided his friend's eyes.

"Yeah?"

"Could you um…you know…um…"

Kagome blinked as a flat iron soared through the air toward her. She almost caught it. Picking it up off the floor, she grinned at Sui.

"Someone wants to look good," she said playfully. Sui blushed. Grabbing Sui's hairbrush, Kagome headed out into the living room. Sui followed. Kagome sat on the couch and gestured for Sui to sit on the ground at her feet. She plugged in the flat iron and waited for it to heat up.

oOo

Inuyasha used his key to unlock the door. He let it swing shut behind him.

"Kagome?"

"In here!" she called back from the living room. He walked through the entryway into the living room. A strange sight awaited him there. Kagome was sitting on the couch, humming as she flat ironed Suikotsu's hair. Inuyasha blinked.

"What the—"

"Hey!" Kagome looked up from the strand of her roommate's hair she was focusing on. "He'll be ready in a sec."

"Okay…" Inuyasha had known Suikotsu for as long as he'd known Kagome. He thought that he really should be used to him by now. Not so much.

Kagome patted the couch beside her and Inuyasha came and sat down.

"What're you doing that for?" he asked, gesturing at Suikotsu's hair. Kagome smiled.

"He wants to look nice for Ren-kun," she murmured. Her words were followed by growls from both men in the room.

"I do not!" cried Sui, as Inuyasha muttered "Do not call him Ren-kun!"

Kagome sighed. "Fine. Sui does not want to look nice to go spend a night with Renkotsu." She grinned wickedly. "He's only been obsessing over it ever since I called you, after all."

Sui said something that sounded like "Nnnmfrrg!"

Inuyasha stared at him.

"Now," said Kagome, unplugging the flat iron, "for the finishing touch!"

"Oh no," muttered Sui.

Kagome pulled a clear lip gloss out of her purse and knelt down beside Sui. "It gives your lips extra kissability!"

Inuyasha snorted.

"Nonononononono!" said Sui. "Nonono-nnnf!" Kagome had taken advantage of his panic to brush a stroke of lip gloss on. He tried to shove her off. She ignored him.

"Make yourself useful, would you?" she asked, turning to Inuyasha. "Hold him down!"

Laughing silently, Inuyasha grabbed Sui's shoulders from behind and held him in place. Kagome applied the lip gloss, ignoring Sui's protests.

"There!" Kagome slipped the gloss back into her purse and stood back to examine her work.

"I feel gay," muttered Sui. Kagome rolled her eyes.

"C'mon. You don't wanna be late for Ren, do you?"

Sui sprang off the ground. Kagome laughed.

"'K, let's go." She grabbed Inuyasha's hand and her purse, and followed Sui out the door.

oOo

Renkotsu growled at the loud knock on his door. He liked peace and quiet.

He hated Inuyasha.

"What?" was his response.

His roommate ignored him, unlocking the door and coming through, holding his girlfriend by the hand, her roommate somewhat nervously following.

"Why'd you knock?" he muttered.

"To annoy you," Inuyasha replied. "Here's your date for this evening."

Renkotsu rolled his eyes.

"Not gay."

Suikotsu gave Kagome a scathing look. She put her finger to her lips.

"You've never had a girlfriend," Inuyasha retorted. "You could be."

Renkotsu shook his head. "Nope."

"Umm…" Kagome grabbed Sui's arm and pulled him over to where Ren was sitting on the couch. "Here you go." She plunked him down next to Renkotsu. "Have fun." She winked.

Renkotsu grumbled something that sounded a little like, "Notgayshutup." Kagome waved.

Sui looked anywhere but at Renkotsu. "Bye," he muttered to Kagome, suddenly wishing he'd never agreed to this. "Have fun." In his words, it was sarcastic.

Kagome nodded. "'Course!" Bye bye!"

And she and Inuyasha were gone.

For a moment, there was silence.

"Suikotsu? Are you…wearing…lip gloss?"

"What?" Suikotsu spun to face Ren. "No! Yes! Maybe! I don't know! Kagome made me!"

Renkotsu laughed a low, soothing laugh. Suikotsu's breath caught in his throat. His heart melted into a gigantic puddle of goo, slowing oozing down to pool at his feet.

"Don't worry, it looks cute."

"Gaaaah!"

Thud

ItlookscuteitlookscuteitlookscuteitlookscuteHESAIDITLOOKSCUTE!

"Um…what are you doing on the floor?"

"…nothing."

"Okay…"

Renkotsu rolled his eyes. The guy was pretty cute, in a silly kind of way. He glanced down at him, where he was lying spread-eagled on the floor. Hmm…he has a nice ass…

Renkotsu shook his head forcefully. NO, he does NOT!

Disgruntled, Sui rolled over. "Sorry about this," he mumbled.

Renkotsu nodded wordlessly. I will not think that he has a nice dick…

A/N: Thanks for reading! Reviews are very welcome, as is constructive criticism. All flames will be given to Renkotsu. He will dispose of them for us; how very kind. We considered entitling this fic "'Tis the Season to be Gay!" It will emerge into a Christmas fic later, you see. We also considered the line "Well, he could roll over, but that would create the crotch problem…"

Can you guess where?

Soo…thanks a lot! Review!