Disclaimer: I don't own any part of Criminal Minds or the characters…
Summary: Reid goes to Garcia for help when he feels like he needs some computer experience and hilarity occurs, well not for these two…. Birthday fic for healthnut1232… Slight mentions of H/P romance, though
A/N: This is my first Garcia/Reid fic and I'm not really sure how it turned out, but here it is. No romance between these two, but slight mentions of H/P romance. This story was written for my fanfiction friend, healthnut1232. Happy Birthday, girlie! She sent me a PM, asking if I could write a birthday fic for her. Hope you like it, healthnut!
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"Every true genius is bound to be naïve". -Friedrich Schiller
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Zero Tolerance
Reid continued to work on the files that were stacked up on his desk. There had to be at least twenty more of the brown paper files sitting on his desk top, waiting to be worked on and finished up. He could have sworn there had been less files there before he had gone to the break room to grab, yet another cup of steaming hot coffee with just the right amount of milk and sugar. He always liked having more sugar in his coffee than anything else because it helped him stay awake and focus on his files.
With the sneaky looks that Morgan and Emily had been shooting each other, Reid suspected that it was their doing that he had so many files on this desk, while their desks, that had been stacked with files about 5 minutes earlier, were almost ridden of them entirely.
"Done" Emily chorused in a sing-song voice that nearly echoed through the almost empty, BAU floor. Picking up her files, she shot an "I'm better than you" smirk at Morgan, who frowned at the grinning brunette.
"Yeah, well you probably finished all of your files as quickly as you could so that you could have more time to make out with Hotch at his desk for hours" Morgan continued with a teasing scowl.
"Yeah, well you're probably right" she answered, chuckling at his thoughts. By now, everyone on the team knew about the advancing relationship between Emily and Hotch, each agreeing to keep it a secret from Strauss and the directors. Relationships in the Bureau were frowned upon with the rules of fraternization, enforced by the Ice Queen, herself.
After Emily had gone up to Hotch's office, Morgan turned to Reid. "Listen, kid. Sorry about dropping those extra files onto your work load. It was mostly Princess' idea to make you the scapegoat in all of this. You know that it-"
"Was mostly your idea. Yes, Morgan. I know that" Reid finished with a teasing smirk, eyes still locked on the files in front of him. Morgan glanced in the direction of Hotch's office in time to see Emily closing the shades on their boss' office windows.
"Oh, you are a naughty girl, Prentiss" Morgan murmured. "I never would have thought that those two do the dirty at work".
"Mmmm Hmmm" Reid answered. "Okay, Morgan. I'm all done, but instead of walking in on Hotch and Emily, I think I'm going to call Hotch before I go up there. I definitely don't want to see what I saw when I walked in on them last time".
Morgan rolled his eyes at the genius, who called Hotch's office phone from his own to let him know that he would be coming up to give the Unit Chief the finished files.
*~OoO~*
After exiting Hotch's office, Reid decided to head on over to Garcia's lair. JJ had left early to bring Henry to his friend's birthday party and Dave had left to attend a conference about his newest book that he had recently published. Morgan had just left on a date with Jordan Todd and Hotch and Emily were having a love feast in Hotch's office.
Reid knew that Garcia always had something fun going on, even on a Thursday night. Rapping on her door, he saw the bubbly blonde technical analyst standing before him a minute later. She was wearing a blue and purple polka dotted skirt, a deep red shirt and black high heels. Her blonde hair was curled with a red and white flower pinned on the side of her head. As usual, she was also wearing tons of colorful jewelry and makeup.
"Why hello, young genius. What brings you by the wonderful lair of Penelope Garcia this fine Thursday night?"
"Um hey Garcia. I uh actually had a question for you"
"Go ahead and shoot" she responded with a smile at her fellow stuttering co-worker and friend.
"Well you know how you are really educated with computers?" Reid continued, stepping from side to side on the cold tile floor outside the tech girl's office.
"Yeah?"
"Well, I was speculating if you can clarify the statistics about the art of technology?" Reid asked slowly.
"In English, please?" she asked with a smirk.
"Can you teach me some tricks about computers?"
He watched Garcia's blue eyes light up like stars. She surprised the younger man by pulling him into a giant bear hug.
"Why, sure! It's about time that you have an ambition to work with computers, unlike my other dear, yet stubborn, friend, Mr. Rossi". Garcia clapped her hands excitedly. "This is gonna be so much fun. Maybe I'll have hope for when the time comes for me to end my career at this wonderful Bureau, I'll have a viable young man to inherit my talents".
Nodding, Reid began to think about whether or not it really was a good idea to see Garcia. She pulled him into her office and excitedly shut the door behind the two of them.
*~OoO~*
"So, my young, dark blonde friend, let this be the time when we begin to embark on the wonderful journey of computers and cyber world". Garcia waved her hands in the air and started up two more computers on her desktop.
"Why don't you start up that third one right there?" the blonde asked, pointing to another computer. "Just press that button on the bottom, right hand corner".
Reid leaned forward to press the button, but pressed too hard, nearly knocking the computer backwards off of Garcia's desk. Garcia let out a slight scream and grabbed the computer by its stem, pulling it back up onto the desk.
Garcia placed a hand over her heart. "Okay, we wouldn't want anything happening to Chacola, would we?" she let out a nervous laugh.
"Sorry Garcia" Reid replied, slowly furrowing his eyebrows. "Can I ask who Chacola is?"
"Chacola is the name of this computer, my man, just like my name is The Wonderful and Awing Penelope Garcia and your name is The Fantastic, King of Nerds and Super Cool Pretty Boys, the One and Only, Spencer Reid!" the blonde answered dramatically.
Reid just gave her a perplexed look. "So, with that said, my young genius, no harm done and let's continue on this wonderful journey of learning about technology. At least what you did isn't as bad as what Gumdrop did the other day. Breaking my special pink wireless mouse, I wanted to break her pretty buttocks into four equal pieces" she muttered. "As much as she bought me a new one, that one was really special. I had it for three years".
Reid raised an eyebrow at that while Garcia continued. "Okey dokey, than. Let's continue".
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"So this is the main screen. You can log into the internet or as I like to call it, the link to the world of wonder and criminology. So, click on the big letter "E" to get started with that".
Reid moved his arm forward to use the mouse and instead, his elbow collided with the "ON" button on Garcia's stand up fan. Papers flew across the room, one landing on Reid's face. His vision clouded and he fell off the spinning chair and onto the floor, accidentally hitting off two switches with his foot on the way down. The lights went off and so did all of the computers.
"Help! I can't see" Garcia cried. "Where are my glasses? Reid?"
*~OoO~*
"Hey Hotch. Did you hear that noise?" Emily asked quietly, gently pulling away from their overly passionate kiss and hearing Hotch moan from the loss of contact that their lips had made. "It sounded like a scream".
"The only screams I'm hearing are yours" Hotch mumbled while a butt naked Emily got up from his chest on the floor of his office. Both agents began to get dressed and Emily leaned over to turn on a light.
"Uh, Aaron? You're desk light isn't working."
"Again? I just changed the bulb the other day. I went to some hardware store that just opened. They probably sell a bunch of cheap crap that doesn't work for long".
"I don't think that it's just your desk lamp. Your ceiling light isn't going on either" Emily remarked, flicking the switch. "Then again, this place has been turning into a dump lately. The bathroom sinks are falling apart and now the wiring is bad".
"Em? I think the power is out" Hotch suggested, glancing out the window of his office to see the entire bullpen had darkened. Even Strauss' office was dark.
Hotch and Emily hurried out into the bullpen and saw Strauss standing in the middle of it, flashlight in hand.
*~OoO~*
"Agents. Do you have any idea how this might have happened? This entire floor is in a blackout" she announced, handing each one of them a flashlight.
"No, ma'am. We don't know. Agent Prentiss and I were discussing a recent case issue when we discovered that the power was out" Hotch lied, shooting Emily a sneaky grin when Strauss turned her head.
"We did hear a scream, didn't you sir?" Emily asked Hotch. "I'm going to see if technical analyst, Garcia, is okay". Upon approaching the door, she banged lightly, hearing the piercing voice of Penelope hitting her ears. Emily pushed the tightened door open with all her might and it opened, banging against the wall.
"Oh, Em. Thanks for rescuing us. When the power went out, my automatic door locking system wouldn't let me out. Reid and I would have been stuck in here all night, if you hadn't come along". The blonde hugged Emily tightly, followed by Reid.
"What's going on in here, agents?" Strauss asked, looking at the two.
Garcia opened her mouth to speak. "Well, Chief Strauss. I was teaching Dr. Reid how to operate a computer, since he isn't very good with them and well…there were a couple of ah…complications".
"Is that true, Dr. Reid? Are you the one who has knocked out the power on this floor and the wireless communications?" Strauss asked, placing her hands on her hips and sighing.
"Uh well, yes…l-I mean I didn't mean to, ma'am, but you see, I fell off of a chair and accidentally broke two switches that operated the power and the wireless communications. It was an accident" Reid stuttered nervously, glancing at Garcia and Emily, who were trying to hide their smirks from Strauss. Even the corners of Hotch's lips were raised in an almost smirk.
Rolling her eyes at the clumsy agent, Strauss proclaimed that she was going to call the electricity company to fix the problem and headed up to her office to grab her cell phone, leaving Emily, Hotch, Garcia and Reid standing in the doorway of Garcia's wreaked office.
*~OoO~*
"Reid, what the hell did you do?" Emily asked, bursting out in laughter.
"He ruined my office, that's for sure" Garcia murmured. "Look". She held up the flashlight, illuminating the office in a dim light. There were wires all over the floor, an over turned chair, splatters of a blue liquid and various items from Garcia's desk. "The blue stuff is my blue Gatorade" she finished.
Emily and Hotch chuckled while Reid looked down at the floor, clearly embarrassed. "Garcia, I'm really sorry. I didn't mean to ruin your office".
Garcia crossed her arms over her chest. "I know, Reid. What you did is worse than what Emily did to my precious mouse, but now I know that I'm going to need someone else to take over my job when I leave this Bureau". Her eyes lit up when a certain person came to mind. "I know. I'll ask JJ!"
Emily smirked, bidding the two agents a goodbye, while Hotch took her hand, leading her back up to his office.
*~OoO~*
"Maybe the darkness won't be so bad after all" Emily said with a smile when Hotch closed the door behind both of them.
"Oh, you know it won't" Hotch continued with a smirk, leaning down to kiss Emily sweetly on the cheek.
*~OoO~*
"A sense of humor is a major defense against minor troubles". -Mignon McLaughlin
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