Author's Notes: Written for the Phoenix Wright Kink Meme, the prompter asked for some April Fool's angst, featuring a relationship between Phoenix and Edgeworth that Phoenix believed to be fake, a prank. It has been slightly edited from the initial upload to the Kink Meme, but largely remains unchanged.
It begins with a kiss.
Phoenix exits the courtroom with Maya, the morning's trial ending in their favour. His client is taken to fill out his acquittal paperwork as the courtroom shuts its doors. Maya finds Pearl amongst the massed crowd of viewers and together they begin talking happily.
Phoenix watches as his friends cavort and chatter, finally resolving to stand outside and bask in the glory of his win. He stands on the corner of the street, a few feet down from the doors of the courthouse, when he hears the clatter of footsteps behind him. There's barely any time to turn and register that it's Edgeworth approaching, because before he knows it a soft kiss is pressed an inch away from his lips.
He turns his head in shock, a red, chalky blush spreading across his cheeks. Edgeworth smiles at him, holds his hand. His palm is warm, Phoenix realises, and his smile is warm. He's smiling. It takes him a while to notice that the beam across the man's face is not the smirk he usually wears.
Edgeworth seems to recognise the surprise upon Phoenix's face. He leans in for a second kiss and asks Phoenix what's wrong. Phoenix is startled; Edgeworth has never been this close to anyone, let alone him, and it takes him a moment to stammer out his question.
Why are you doing this?
Edgeworth lets out a low chuckle, his voice resonating into Phoenix's very heartbeat. And he answers.
Boyfriends.
Phoenix stares into Edgeworth's eyes.
Boyfriends?
Edgeworth frowns and tsks. He begins to explain something, but Phoenix isn't listening. Regardless of what Edgeworth is saying, Phoenix knows that yesterday there was nothing between them but the fraying knot of their friendship, strong enough to remain but too weak to evolve into anything more. Phoenix doesn't know why any of this is happening, but knowing that yesterday things were normal, and today things are not, he comes to the one conclusion.
It's a prank.
Phoenix ticks off the details in his head. One. Edgeworth is never this forward to anybody, not even his own sister. Two. If he and Edgeworth were, in fact, boyfriends, surely he would have known about it before today. And three, yesterday Edgeworth had paid him next to no attention. A niggling thought prods at the back of his mind — It's unlike Edgeworth to manipulate anyone's emotions for personal amusement — but he bats it away with the thought that Edgeworth is a pawn for another, perhaps someone with a grudge against the defence attorney.
It doesn't matter, he ultimately decides, because he's not going to play along. He pushes Edgeworth away and looks down the opposite end of the street, hands in pockets. He can't see Edgeworth's face, but he expects that he's sighing and giving up his charade.
He doesn't. Phoenix's breath stills as he feels two hands on his shoulders turning him around, and soft lips pecking his nose.
Edgeworth congratulates him for his success in his case, and Phoenix decides to play along, seeing no harm in humouring the man. He takes a more active role in his situation, leaning against Edgeworth and beginning to kiss him slowly.
It's bizarre, having Edgeworth this close to him, he thinks, as he takes a sip of coffee.
Back of the coffee shop, in a booth. Under the table, Edgeworth's hand and his own are linked, away from the sight of others.
He's always seen an invisible wall standing between himself and the man beside him, keeping them at a safe distance from each other. They've come close to knocking the wall down in the past, he thinks as he remembers the re-established friendship following Edgeworth's acquittal in the DL-6 case, and again when Edgeworth returned from overseas and helped him with convicting Engarde. But those were only cracks in the wall; if this is real the wall practically doesn't exist anymore. And the debris, more and more seems to sweep away every time Edgeworth holds his hand, kisses him, or smiles at him.
And then Phoenix remembers that it's a prank, that Edgeworth is playing him a fool.
The wall reappears, taller than ever, bricks stacking on with every breath Phoenix takes, every beat of heartbreak that thrums through his veins.
Phoenix has entertained the idea that it's a prank throughout the whole day, although he becomes less certain of his conclusion as Miles wraps his arms around his torso, pulling him in for a gentle embrace. The sofa is hardly big enough for the both of them to stretch out and cuddle, but it is comfortable. Their bowls of pasta sit on the coffee table, steam rising and then disappearing, like Phoenix's fears.
They eat the pasta in between a flurry of hugs and kisses, embraces and sweet nothings. The familiar music of the Steel Samurai quietly blasts from the television set; Phoenix sees Edgeworth's eyes glance at the screen and he smiles. They can watch it together.
Phoenix doesn't pay the same attention to the episode as Edgeworth does, preferring to sort through his thoughts and emotions regarding the day. Edgeworth is his apparent boyfriend, something he still doesn't believe to be true. Today, Edgeworth is warm. Edgeworth is caring. Edgeworth is exhibiting a new side of himself to Phoenix, for Phoenix and Phoenix alone. Prank or not, Phoenix is grateful for it.
The show draws to a close as the characters onscreen wave goodbye to them, promising to return in a week's time. Miles is leaning against Phoenix, calm. Phoenix doesn't realise until now that their hands are entwined together on the sofa. And, somehow, he wants to believe that it's real — he knows it isn't, there's no point denying that — but some strange part of him wants to imagine that the soft squeeze of Miles's hand is honest, that the gentle kiss pressed to his cheek is genuine.
The kiss is followed by another, and another, as Phoenix suspends his disbelief, giving up to the man beside him. He doesn't care that it's a prank anymore; he tries his best to not think about how broken he'll be when the day passes, when Miles isn't necking him tenderly as he is now.
They're fumbling to the room, their settings shifting around them as they move to the bedroom. Miles is pressed to the bed, Phoenix lavishes him with kisses as his free hand fumbles in the drawers.
And then, as he pulls Miles's slacks off his legs, and then his underwear, he knows it isn't a prank. Edgeworth blushes as Phoenix glances at his length, stiff and protruding from light silvery curls. Phoenix notices with a light flush that he's never been this turned on in his life, and he wants nothing more than to make love to the man beside him, the man whispering endearments in his ear and squeezing his hand within his own.
Phoenix kisses Miles as he prepares him. The man moans softly, bringing Phoenix closer to him. It's as though they've done this before, Phoenix thinks, and it's been so long, so long, since he's been intimate with anyone else.
If he didn't acknowledge it before, he does now. He's in love with Miles Edgeworth.
Miles's name slips off Phoenix's tongue as he enters him, the tight, warm sensation being almost too much to bear. He feels as though he could cry, the man underneath him is smiling. He loves him, too. Overcome with emotion, his affections fall from his mouth, he begins to move slowly. He tells Miles again and again that he loves him, hears Miles answer with equal adoration.
It's Miles's soft moans of his name that undo him, the warm body below him panting and blushing as Phoenix reaches his peak. His own breath stills and his head nuzzles into Miles's neck as he rides out his release, feeling at one with the man in his arms. He covers Miles in kisses; on his lips, his cheek, his jaw, feeling the hot flush of Miles's skin radiate onto him. His hand wraps around Miles's length and he pulls a few times, until Miles joins him in release and they collapse together, arms around each other.
Their panting breaths fall to deep inhales and exhales as they regain themselves, two beings completely in love and at peace with the world. The world is right, Phoenix decides, as he kisses Miles one last time before falling into a deep sleep.
The world is right.
It's barely eight in the morning when he wakes up. He stretches out, eyes still shut, expecting to wrap an arm around Edgeworth.
But the bed's empty.
He rubs his eyes and opens them, blinking a few times in disbelief. And then he remembers.
The bed's empty. It's been empty for years.
Edgeworth isn't here. He never was here.
One of Phoenix's hands ball into a fist as he feels his pulse quicken, the unpleasant truth dawning on him as he realises that none of that day — that carefree, cheerful, lazy, beautiful day — was real.
He remembered thinking the day was a prank, something only a fool would believe. Something only he would believe.
His eyes pan the room as he looks for a smidgen of hope in his painful reality. The blue beanie and its badges gleam wickedly at him from the nightstand.
He's not even an attorney anymore.
None of it was real.
…
…
…
But it can be real.
His eyes settle on the cellular next to the aforementioned beanie. A streak of adrenaline rushes through him as he dials the numbers. Long-distance.
It's worth the inevitable expensive phone bill, he decides, as he hears the voice of the one person he wants to hear. And he answers it.
"Hello, Miles."