Jackson's highly questionable adventures at 2Fort

Jackson is a simple, slacker stoner who materializes in 2Fort somehow. Watch as our OC hero deals with the RED team, rocket launchers, and deals with his disintegrating sanity.

I wrote this out for hoots, but mostly of boredom one night. It was going to be about some guy who gets transported to a mythical land with wacky characters. But I thought it was too stupid.

Somehow, my idea evolved into this.

I bet there are millions of mistakes, feel free to find every single one. I will give you a trophy.

Rated M for bad words and drug use

Jackson wakes up in the safety of his home

The sunlight shone through the thin crack of my dark blue curtains, blinding me as if it was some sort of toxic laser. I could hear my neighbour's dog barking signalling that it was now morning, and more possibly the afternoon.

I slowly woke from another alcohol-induced slumber, fighting against gravity to sit up. With a tried groan that resembled a dying creature, I had difficultly, trying to untangle myself from the mess of bed sheets and comforters. With my eyes and mouth dry as sandpaper and my body aching from laying in the wrong position all night, it was yet another bleary start to another day of doing nothing.

Stumbling to the bathroom and expelling my bladder, I half-heartily washed my face afterwards and stared at myself at the mirror for a moment. When, my spell of sudden vanity was over, I snatched my jacket laying on the lino floor (half wet from someone having a shower) and I dragged my feet to the kitchen. Ignoring the rising pile of undone dishes from the night before, I glanced over to the stove to see the kettle still steaming on the element; what I needed was a good, hot, cup of tea to-

"Good afternoon Jack."

With another groan (much quieter though), I rolled my head slightly to face the cold owner of the voice. Kate, ie. younger sister, evil tyrant sat on her spot at the small kitchen table, her manicured hand holding a spoon, her other clutching the paper. Kate didn't look at me as she left her spoon in her bowl of oats to take a sip of tea. I started to prepare my own cup.

"Hey."

Silence filled the gap between us.

I looked out towards the garden. It looked like rain, the sky was covered in grey clouds with darker, scarier ones away in the distance. I saw our fat neighbour, Phillips or Levowitz or something, the owner of the yappy hound watering his plants with a hose. I never understood why he did that, it was clearly going to rain. I looked up towards the clouds some more, distracting myself from listening to Kate turning the pages of the paper.

Things were again awkward between us. It was common now to be fighting every third or fourth day now, and spending the rest of the week pretending it never happened and ignoring each other. Although she is 3 years younger, she acts of mother, nursemaid, lawyer and judge for every little thing. She reminds me of a leopard, a cute, lovely creature with the ability to rip your face to shreds if provoked. And I, an antelope, a scrawny, tall slender man, who gets his ass handed by his little sister every day. It wasn't my fault, in fact if I had it my way, I be gone from this wretched little nest. Alas, mother bought the flat for both us. Just because I wasn't as successful and getting more money at work and had less trusting friends, doesn't mean a thing. It was my curse for being the handsome one.

Often I'd send a witty quirk about her absence of friendship and boys, which would send her screaming the same rant over and over until I say sorry, or she finds something else to yell about. But, me still in the beginning of a hangover, decided not to push her buttons today. Instead, I would make polite conversation and get on her good side.

I went back to preparing my tea,

"So, you're still home?"

She took another drink from her own mug. "I have an important date with a potential business venture-er. We're having dinner tonight."

I didn't understand that sentence. I pondered if she just made it up on the spot, but in my state, I would be better not think about it. Her smug smile forced me to forget about preventing the serious matter of my hangover.

"Oh good, maybe if you're lucky, it's a man and he's handsome, rich and single, and he'll sweep you off your feet and you'll live in a castle and move out."

An awkward pause surfaced. Only the clinking noises my spoon made against my mug of tea when I mixed in the honey and milk was heard. I knew what was coming. surprisingly, Kate sounded very calm.

"Maybe. But then, you might nearly die in your own filth and you'll have move back in with mum. And then *I* have to deal with the repercussions that follow."

Did I hear a single strain of spite? I stared ahead, staring out into the tiny garden outside the window; I smirked... Dare I?

"At least you'll finally get laid."

Oh dear, I did struck a nerve... that pleases me.

"How *OLD* are you?"

Oh god, I here it comes. God damn, I wish I didn't start this again, I don't want a headache. I regret everything.

Her teeth barred like a rapid dog, she forgot about her oats. I simply ignored her. The faster I let her get through her dissatisfaction, the faster if would be quieter.

I yawned and one of my sluggish hands rubbed at my morning stubble on my face. Fortunately, my headache did not return but I did notice how much quieter it gotten. I looked over at Kate; she was staring at me with fierce eyes, awaiting my response.

I decided to change the subject. I rolled my eyes and left the kitchen towards the living/sunroom.

"I'm going to Slemaches later. You need anything while I'm out?"

I collapsed heavily on the sofa, thankfully setting my mug of tea on the coffee table before hand.

Although I couldn't see her face, I could tell she crossed her arms,

"Oh, you that smelly hard candy you like?"

I narrowed my eyes and glared towards the ceiling, "You know what I meant. And for your information, I'm not going to see my 'goonish friends' tonight. I'm going to detoxify my body this weekend. Nothing but pure fruits and vegan mayo for me."

"And a few joints." She added.

I didn't answer. I didn't answer because she was right. Well I don't care. It's my fucking week off and I could do whatever I please at home.

The rest of the morning- or the afternoon involved her and me ignoring one another. It kept the peace going and her sanity intact. Whatever she does in her office/bedroom is beyond me, I however, branched out throughout the entire flat, keeping my computer in the living room.

I made myself a pear and apple smoothie and sat crossed legged at the table. With a few clicks, I was logged into steam, and was on my way onto playing some little violent videogames. The familiar tune of the Demoman's theme brought a grin to my face. I choose a server and waited for it to load, sipping on my drink, re-reading my stats on the computer screen. I had nothing else better to do.

Kate eventually emerged from her domain, going on her dinner adventure.

"Leaving already?" I asked dodging a rocket and hiding behind a conveniently placed stack of crates. Running out of bullets in the middle of a war-zone means you're pretty much dead. Not unless you're a master at melee battling, which I admit, is not my forte.

She frowned, "It's 5:30. My meeting is at 6:50."

"Oh"

God dammit, where did the day go?

"Yes, um, I don't know when I'll be back. Maybe 8, 8:30. We'll see." She muttered, taking out her keys.

I knew exactly what she was doing. To prevent starting another fight, she'd give me a stern look, as in a warning. If I didn't answer her right way would lead to her shouting insults at me.

I, who simply wanted to play TF2 and prevent another headache, just complied.

"Yes, I won't smoke in the house." I grumbled. My Soldier character was brutally slaughtered by a shower of bullets.

"Good. And make sure you don't smoke near Mr. Baines this time. Poor man has tuberculosis. He can't stand any type of smo-"

"Yeah, yeah, have fun right."

"I will." Her voice called out, getting fainter as she walked further away. I waited until she closed and locked the door before I went into action.

I sacrificed my character and stayed in the respawn room as I leapt up ecstatically from my seat.

With a few joyful bounds, I scurried to my bedroom and went straight to my hiding spot where I kept all my marijuana. Skimming through all my secret treasures, I finally found my little black cloth bag. With a happy grin, I skipped down the hallway, back to my computer.

I considered smoking in the living room, just to prove I wasn't going to be bossed around by someone younger than me. But, being a self proclaimed slacker, I'm going to put up much of a fight either.

I sighed, and made my way to the wet, murky patio. I sat in a water-soaked cushion in a lawn chair and flicked out a lighter from my sweatshirt pocket. My mumbling and grumbling about the weather starting to decrease, I sat back, relaxed and opened my bag. I removed a joint and pressed it into my mouth while drawing the strings along the bag to a close.

Lighting the exposed side with my light, I inhaled deeply before relaxing letting the grey smoke escape my nose and mouth. Watching the smoke rise and swirl like dragon fire, I suppressed the urge to cough my mouth out. Blinking slowly and watching the rain-like mist fall from the vanilla sky, I thought of what I could do after my smoke break. Following routine, I could smoke my usual smokes then have dinner. I could take out old VHS copies of "Unsolved Mysteries" and huddle under the covers with all the lights on till Kate comes back.

I began to smoke a cigarette, a common practice I taken on after watching people older than me do.

I get all my best ideas while high, I could continue my epic novel that will one day rival Harry Potter. I perked suddenly. There was something I wanted to do; dominate that 13 year old Demoman with his damn pimp hat.

Rushing inside before bolting the door, I dried my wet feet on the shag carpet and wrung the leg bottoms of my pyjamas. Taking a moment, I tossed all the butts into the compost and put the black bag into my shoulder pocket for later.

I sat back into the office chair, and tuned on the monitor and placed my hands over the appropriate keys on the key board and mouse. I was ready to attack with vigour the moment I left the respawn roo-

What the fuck? I stared at the screen.

I was in the respawn alright. But everything was frozen, no sound, no movement, just a POV of my Soldier character staring at the respawn door.

"Pah! This is just what I need" I muttered.

I rushed my mouse around, hoping that I'd see that little pointer. None.

I grumbled and slouched. Now I'll have to restart the damn game.

"Now I have to wait till it loads again... Stupid, expensive computer thing."

What a perfect moment to destroy my peaceful buzz. I pressed the restart button, leaned back in my seat and waited. Nothing happened.

Aw for- FUCKS sake.

On my hands and knees, wedged under the computer desk, I began a search to find out what was wrong. The computer was still plugged in, every wire was connected and the power wasn't off. But I'm not a computer expert, maybe I should-

I froze. Something was wrong.

I sat back into my seat.

My headache I thought long gone returned with the power of a 100 power drills. But this didn't feel like a normal pain, this was a painful, like your head will implode type. I rubbed my temples gingerly.

I blinked a bit when my eyes got tingly, and I eagerly took another sip of my forgotten smoothie.

Is this normal to have my limps feel like jelly? I shook my arms out; they were getting number, with odd pulses coming from the joints.

I groaned and clenched my teeth.

Ohhhhh fuck, what the fuck is wrong with me? I needa... I need to call...

I froze. A strange electronic buzz came out of nowhere. Before I could even wonder where it was coming from, I held the sides of my ears to keep it out.

Fuuuuuu- Stopit! I hissed.

I flung myself forward from my chair. This wasn't right, this wasn't right at all.

My whole body was shaking and trembling, I felt everything move around me

I was going numb

The ability to breathe was getting harder

I felt as if my heart was going to leap from my throat if it went any faster.

I was getting disoriented, everything was moving, and I couldn't tell the floor from the wall from the ceiling

I was all numb

I was panicking, what's WRONG to me?

It was the moment when everything simply vanished into darkness that I fell onto thin air.