"Jaaaaack!" came a loud shriek from the garden.
Jack jumped and ran towards the open door.
"Danny, what's the matter?"
"'pider, Jack. A great big 'pider was coming to get me."
Jack gathered up the distraught young boy, trying to keep a straight face.
"It's OK, Danny, I've got you. Do you want me to come out and get rid of him for you? Shall we go and see? He might have gone by now."
"'Kay, Jack."
"There's a brave boy."
"Carry me, Jack."
"OK, Sport. Don't worry I'll not let him get you."
#
"Where is he then?"
"In my house, Jack."
groan "Of course, he had to be in there didn't he. You know how hard it is for me to get in there? It's not designed for grownups! My poor knees, Danny!"
Jack crouched down low and inched his way into the small 'house' in the garden.
"Where was he, Danny? I can't see him."
"Down there, by the window. Be careful, Jack, he's ginormous."
"This him, Danny?" Jack pointed at a spider barely the size of Danny's pinky toe nail.
"That's him, get him, Jack. Get him out of my house."
"OK, calm down, Danny. I'm gonna move him for you."
"Don't hurt him, Jack."
"I'm not going to, don't worry. Danny, please can you run inside and get me a piece of paper."
"'Kay, Jack."
#
"Here y'are, Jack."
"Well done, Danny…er Danny where'd you get this from?"
"Your desk, Jack."
"Ah, OK. Not quite what I had in mind, but I suppose a bank statement is as good as anything!"
"I done OK, Jack?"
"You sure did, Sport. You sure did. Now shall we finally do something with this big bad spider?"
"Sure thing, Jack."
Jack carefully folded the bank statement in two and persuaded the spider to walk onto it.
"You got him, Jack!"
"Sure have! Back up a bit, Danny. I'm coming out."
"Where you gonna put him, Jack?"
"We'll put him in the trees. Pick which one you want to be his new home."
"'Kay, Jack. This one here, I think he'll like this one."
"You wanna say bye to him, Danny?"
Jack carefully tipped the spider out at the base of the tree.
"Bye-bye, 'pider."
"Good boy. You gonna play out here some more?"
"Yep! Gonna play in my house now 'pider's gone home!"
"OK, good plan."
Crisis averted !