Thinking Of You
One-Shot
Three in the morning. I should be sleeping, but I'm not. I haven't sleeped in the past two days and honestly, I'm sick of it.
"Babe?" I heard Devin mumble, his breath tickling my ear.
I sighed, "Huh?"
Two days of Devin staying the night.
"Are you okay?" He asked me, his voice starting to sound a little less... forced.
"Mhmm," I mustered out, thinking of something - someone - that I told myself I would stop thinking about. It's not working.
"Brea," He said my name, his voice taking a serious tone, "Look at me please."
I turned to stare at him. I tried to think of how I loved his brow- no they're blue! Blue blue blue. Not brown. Why the hell would I think Al- DEVIN's eyes were blu- brown!
"What?" I managed to say,
"What's wrong?" He brushed his thumb over a tear that escaped and was making it's way to my chin.
"N-nothing."
"Brea, your awful at lying," He mumbled brushing hair behind my ear, "Now please tell me what's wrong."
I sucked in some air. Devin's awesome, but... he's not the same. He's not the best as awful as that sounds. He's second best and how am I suppose to tell him that's the problem. That he's not as good as my ex. How he's just a rebound in my mind. A year year long rebound. So instead of telling him the truth I just shake my head and force a smile, "Nothing Devin. I swear, just thinking of Anna."
Anna, my sister. Quick thinking Brea. Now Devin can possibly leave in peace with your memories...
"I'm sorry." He cradled me in his arms and kissed my cheek. I felt numb, not knowing what to do. So I just kept silent, contemplating on the six years of my adult life. After I graduated I went to college for photography and got a bachelors in the arts. Started taking pictures for magazines. I eventually moved to New York just for the sake of there being more buisiness. After a while I met my current best friend Mia. She knew these guys who were in a band, so she asked me to take pictures of their concert for her, and I agreed. This led me to meeting the band and led to where I am now. I mean, I probably wouldn't of met Alex if I never met Mia right?
Jesus Christ. Three years completely wasted. A year of being a helpless nothing. All thanks to Mia. And Alex of course... well maybe it was me. I mean, I let him go. Fuck, I said yes to dating him. I didn't deny anything. And then what happened? I got fucking burned. So I guess it's more of my fault than anyones. Right? Right. After these thoughts made their way through every nook and cranny of my brain, raking through every possible idea, outcome, just... anything, I went to sleep. In the wrong guy's arms.
Fuck you Alexander Gaskarth.
My god, that was awful xDD