One day, Princess Tutu was walking around the city plaza,
and her tutu got caught on a nearby tree branch and she began
to play tug-a-war with the plant, only to lose pathetically.
Princess Tutu was furious. She then took out her carving knife
that she carried in her magenta tutu, just in case of emergencies.
For Princess Tutu an emergency could range from a waiter stepping on her carefully
pedicured toe to having her favorite snacks go stale. She ripped off the evil branch
with fury and within 8.37 miliseconds, the branch was now a insanely sharp
axe. She glared gleefully at the tree responsible for the damage of her tutu
then began to hack it into bits and pieces with it's own branch, now her
axe. The tree cried and cried for her to stop but his tears only got
her more excited until she finally had crushed it into mere sawdust, which
she would claim were rare and exotic spices from India at the next
fleamarket. Princess Tutu realized she was in desperate need of a new Tutu.
She could not be seen wearing the filthy hideous Tutu that had a .6 milimeter
rip, which was on the innermost layer of the tutu that was not visible to outsiders.
She went to J.C.Penny's and began to browse through their glamorous Elmo tutus.
She finally found one that suited her, it had a picture of Elmo saying, "ME LIKE NACHOS!" in
a cheerful manner.
Princess Tutu was walking past the bookstore when she noticed her Uncle's Girlfriend's God mother's
neice's sister's best friend, Myuto inside. She went inside and spit some mucus into his ear.
He shrieked, ripped a page out of the book he was reading and gave hera papercut across the neck,
and blood squirted in every which way, onto the other customers. The other customers screamed in
reply and all of them puked on Myuto at the same time, causing Princess
Tutu to forget her wound for a moment and fall to the floor laughing as
hard as possible at Myuto. She then yelled at him, "That's what you get
for that stinkin' name of yours, you grotesque beast!" After that, she ran directly
home.
The next day, she tried on her new Elmo tutu and looked in the mirror.
She was very happy, so happy that she exploded into millions of puke green colored
pieces of confetti.
The end.