The Truth Revealed
By BlackCorp

Rating: T

Disclaimer: G.I. Joe and the characters featured in this story are copyright Hasbro, Inc. No copyright infringement is intended.

Summary: A conversation between character about the use of their weapons.

Duke: Why is it in the cartoon they make it look like I get the girl?

Scarlett: Because the television people didn't want all the nerds out there thinking they couldn't get a girl.

Duke: What's that supposed to mean?

Scarlett: You can lie to yourself all you want, Duke, but we all know the size of the sword does matter.

(SnakeEyes nods his head)

Duke: Women happen to like a man who is in charge!

Scarlett: You keep telling youself that, Duke.

(Scarlett walks up to SnakeEyes and rubs the handle of his sword)

Cobra Commander: She's right, Duke. I started Cobra because I thought it would get me laid.

Duke: You started a terrorist organization to get laid?

Cobra Commander: You know how hard it is to get laid when you're a used car salesman.

Scarlett: You boys just don't get it. The size of the sword matters, as well as how you use it.

Cobra Commander: I know that now since my power got me nowhere, so that's why I got some help.

Storm Shadow: He really doesn't have the skill or right tool. I told him this already, but he's paying me well.

Duke: I'm a real man's man! I don't need a big sword to swing.

Scarlett: Nor a brain it would seem.

Destro: I'm lucky the Baroness can't see well without her glasses and I sell weapons for a living.

Baroness: Destro doesn't know I just like plastic toy swords.

Quick Kick: Hey, I know how to use my foot real well.

Girl: Are you Quick Kick?

Quick Kick: I sure am, baby. You must've heard of my powerful foot.

Girl: Sure did.

Quick Kick: Then you came to see me in action?

Girl: No, a friend of mine told me you kicked your foot into her toaster and it was over too quick.

Scarlett: Guess we know why they call you Quick Kick now.

John Cena: Forget that loser! THE CHAMP IS HERE!

Girl: Who?

John Cena: You know, The Marine.

Duke: Why does the WWE keep sending us its wrestlers?

Girl: Storm Shadow, what a big sword you have!

Storm Shadow: Would you like a private show?

Girl: Sure.

Scarlett: Let's go, SnakeEyes.

Duke: I guess I know the truth now. It's the size of the sword that matters.

Scarlett: And knowing is half the battle.